All of D26’s applications are now in! She is done applying to college! No matter what happens with the rest of her admissions journey, I am so proud of her. I said a bunch along these lines in a post after reading her first early action application, I have more to say now and this is the only place I can really say some of it.
D26 goes to an intense independent school where the majority of students matriculate at highly selective schools with sub-20%ish acceptance rates. The cultural peer pressures are to covet admission into highly rejective schools. Both my wife and I, and many of our closest friends, went to highly rejective schools. My daughter has spent her high school years (and most of her life), surrounded by folks who attended those types of institutions, and kids who aspire to. D26 is also a double legacy at a highly rejective school, which my wife and I loved. D26 cared about none of that. We visited my alma mater early in the process, and she rightly decided it was not a place she wanted to be. Nor were any of its peer schools. She figured out what she wanted in college, and applied to schools that fit that. All small liberal arts colleges, based 100% on fit for her rather than selectivity. The result is that one of her top choices is a sure thing admit for her that accepts 60%+ of applicants. Her other top choices were a target and a reach that was the only fairly highly selective that made her final list.
The majority of students at her high school also apply ED somewhere. Typically about 1/2 the class is done with admissions by now, and know where they are going due to ED. All of the cultural pressures pointed toward the notion that D26 should ED. Her college counselors explained that she is competitive for her reach in RD, but ED would greatly increase her chances there. ED to her top choice target would convert it to a likely. Despite that, and what virtually all of her friends were doing, she decided that she was unwilling to give up the top choice “safety” at this point to increase her chances at the more selective schools. She understood that may mean she doesn’t get into one, or both of those, but did not want to choose one simply because it increased the odds to get in. Honestly, I doubt I would have had the maturity to make that choice as a teen. I likely would have chased prestige and ED’d to the reach even if I didn’t want to go there more. Her ability to block out the noise of what other people want, and what other people think of her choices, to do what is best for her is a quality I deeply admire.
Earlier this break she was reflecting on her admissions situation positively. She felt bad for her friends who applied ED and did not get in, some of whom were scrambling to add schools to their lists and figure out if they wanted to do an ED2. She also wondered aloud to me if some of her friends who got in ED, but who in her view picked a school to commit to in part because it increased their odds of admission, would wonder if they made the right choice without seeing what their other options might have been. She was happy that she has a school she likes that she knows she can go to, and can see what the other options look like in comparision. She said, if she gets into none of the others, then the sure thing school was meant to be. It made me melt with pride and joy for her.
To be at this stage and to know that D26 has charted her own path, despite the norms of her community and everyone else’s opinions (including mine), is a beautiful thing. The fact that regardless of what happens with admissions in March, she will end up at her #1 choice on top of that, is such a gift.
Happy New Year everyone!
D26 has an interview coming up for a full cost of attendance Scholarship that will only be an 8 min zoom call. This seems so crazy short for something so big!!! Anyone have any recommendations for resources that might prep her for the interview ?
