<p>My parents think I don’t have any friends in High School, yet I do (About 4~5 Very good friends, and then the rest people I usually talk to). Their argument is that you don’t go somewhere together, on plans or call each other. How can I convince that I am in fact not friendless and have a decent social life? It’s frustrating for me to see them say since I never talk to a friend outside school, I don’t have any. We live in a rather large area, and with all classes, time schedules and so on its impractical to meet up. Any ideas on what to say?</p>
<p>Socialize with your friends during the weekends. Have some weekend fun with your friends–Go to the movies, get some pizza, go to the mall, play sports, etc. There is always time for friends outside of the classroom.</p>
<p>Not really practical, but I could probably try, any other ideas?</p>
<p>Not practical? Why isn’t it practical to do things with your friends outside of the classroom setting? High School is the time to learn how to balance responsibilities and fun.</p>
<p>I agree with Nysmile, I was very thrown off by your response that is was not practical. If they are people you strictly only hang out with at school then your parents are going to believe you have friends if you never make plans or hangout after school or the weekends. I’m sure your parents wouldn’t mind if you invited a few of them over to your house on the weekend to hang out and what not. Heck throw a huge party that will show them!</p>
<p>Are you introverted? (The real definition, not the stereotype.) Check out this book, and perhaps share with your parents if you think it describes you.</p>
<p>[Quiet:</a> The Power of Introverts in a World That Can’t Stop Talking: Susan Cain: 0030788707778: Amazon.com: Books](<a href=“http://www.amazon.com/Quiet-Power-Introverts-World-Talking/dp/0307352145/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1350345955&sr=8-1&keywords=quiet]Quiet:”>http://www.amazon.com/Quiet-Power-Introverts-World-Talking/dp/0307352145/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1350345955&sr=8-1&keywords=quiet)</p>
<p>My dd doesn’t need to be around people–in fact, she needs a lot of alone time to be comfortable and happy.</p>
<p>You sound just fine to me.</p>
<p>I worried about my son the first two years of high school because he never went out, but talking to other parents with boys that age I found out none of the boys went out much. Instead, they “hung out” on the computer IMing and/or texting. It really wasn’t until his older friends started driving that he went out. In my son’s case it was also harder because he went to a private school and the kids lived all over in a 50 mile radius of the school, but my friends with boys in the local high school reported the same thing.</p>
<p>@marbling, yea I am introverted, I’m fine being alone. @emilybee thats basically the case in my school.</p>
<p>Do not underestimate the value of learning how to socialize with peers in a variety of environments. This skill will prove very useful in the college setting (group projects) as well as future career networking.</p>
<p>You may be fine being alone, but being alone is not helping you to grow socially. Your goal should be to gain experiences that will help you become a well rounded adult.</p>
<p>How much time do you spend on the computer, PhoenixForce, that isn’t directly homework related? How about video games?
I agree with the parents who feel that actual face time with people is very important to one’s development. Do you have outside activities that bring other people into your life, outside of class time? If you’re involved in sports or clubs, that’s great, and probably provides plenty of social time. But if you just go home after school and do your homework, get on the computer or play video games, or even just read and hang out by yourself after school and on weekends, you may be missing out on some important experiences. Maybe your folks would just like to see that you’re involved with something.</p>
<p>My S also had friends at school but was happy being at home on his xbox or on the computer…he did not need friends around him. As long as he was happy and socially fine at school it was ok with us that he preferred home to be his alone time.</p>
<p>Yes some people are very happy with their own company. Don’t feel bad about it.</p>
<p>My niece attended a county-wide selective honors program that meant at least an hour each way on the school bus for her. Her best friends were at least 30 minutes away by car. My other niece attended a rural school where the driving time at 60 mph on the highway was easily 30 minutes from one part of the district to another, and even longer times would be involved if the trip did not involve much hard pavement. I have no difficulty whatsoever in accepting that spending time in the physical presence of school friends out of school hours is impractical.</p>
<p>^There are plenty of weekends and academic breaks (including summer months) to allow for getting together and socializing face-to-face with friends.</p>
<p>nysmile - If transportation is an issue, unless the parents are ready, willing, and able to put in the road time, socializing on the weekends, etc. can still be problematic.</p>
<p>Based on the first post, his parents are concerned about his lack of face-to-face interaction with peers outside of the school environment. I doubt they would inhibit him from reaching out and socializing with friends on the weekends because of transportation issues. They would probably be more than willing to drive him to a friend’s house. If there is a will and desire to be with friends, it is possible. On the other hand, if he doesn’t want to socialize with peers, making up excuses for doing so is easier than admitting the truth (prefers to be alone).</p>
<p>@moonchild, I am in a few clubs and do stay after school on most days, I go to all of my HS Football games to watch. As for the computer I don’t really spend much time on it? Maybe an hour to two a day. I usually just like to read.</p>
<p>I think that teenagers (especially boys) don’t want to be picked up and dropped off by mommy and daddy. Hence, they’d rather stay home until they or their friends start to drive. I was amazed at how quickly my always at home every weekend night son changed once the kids started to drive.</p>
<p>^That’s good. Do you meet up with your friends at the football games?</p>
<p>Emilybee–Having raised two sons and being a part of a family with many boys, I can tell you that many teenage boys would rather be picked up/dropped off to/from a friend’s house by Mom or Dad then sit at home on weekends with Mom and Dad.</p>
<p>My D is somewhat introverted as well. While she has a handful of friends, they rarely get together except an occasional sleepover for the girls in the group. I pointed out to her recently that they are seniors now, and she might lose touch (at least, “in person” touch) with the boys she is friendly with if they never do anything as a group. She agreed this might be the case, and thinks she will propose some get togethers (even just going for coffee after school as a group or things like that) soon so they can get in the habit of getting together outside school.</p>