@lje62 i complete agree with you that it is all depends how person absorbs the information provided. Unfortunately people normally very supportive when someone needs help, not as so if someone wants to share happy news or accomplishments. This is just human nature.
I had a very negative reaction this week.
A mother, whose child was admitted to the same private HS as my child, but cannot attend due to lack of FA, was openly hostile in actions and words to me. This happened at an 8th grade graduation event, in front of a group of parents, and even in front of a top administrator of the school.
She went off on me when she found out what sports my child would be doing at the school, exclaiming loudly that she was surprised that my child was participating in that sport since she “had heard that my child was not very good at it.” I was shocked that she 1) would say such a thing to me, or to anyone 2) surprised as my child has achieved state level awards, etc.in the sport 3) when told that HS coach had “recruited” my child for team, said she “did not believe it” as she had “been told by people who were on the same club team” that my child was only “mediocre” in the sport. 4) she even asked what specific events were at state level as she has “checked it out” and did not see my child on the list.
This was all done, loudly, with many faces and gestures, much to the astonishment of the small group of parents.
HUH? This mother and child are not even involved in this sport, so, clearly she does not know what she is talking about. And to make it even worse, the kids had been good friends until March 10th…when her child stopped talking to my child after the school decisions came out. Just this week her child had started to talk to mine again.
I am sorry that her child did not get a generous FA package that was needed to attend. Frankly, it’s an honor to even be accepted to the school at all. No one can take that away from her child. Too bad she has not shown her child that she is a proud parent.
It makes me sad that she is like this, and, perhaps, even worse, has passed it on to her child.
How completely rude and antisocial. I have seen her twice since then (for my safety, from a distance), and she has not approached or apologized to me.
Has anyone had something like this happen?
@mexusa. That was deplorable behavior. I think that she probably embarrassed herself by her actions side other people were able to hear and see her.
I had a very bad situation with a parent of a child who I thought I was good friends with. She spent a good 45 minutes one day explaining why my son was lazy and incompetent and why this was my fault because I was a bad parent. This came out the blue. Until that minute we were friends. It has been almost a year and it still really hurts but she never appolgised. At some point you have to let these things go out they will eat at you.
Congrats to your son and his success at getting into high school. Don’t let the jealousy of others take that away.
@LKnomad Thanks for your kind words and wishes. Sorry that it happened to you, too! I know it was jealousy that brought out that fury, but, it still hurts. Hope the children do not pick up these immature and negative attitudes.
{{{{{{{MaineLonghorn}}}}}}
I had to decide long ago that all I could do for braggarts was oooh and ahhhhh over their childrens’ accomplishments and on the other hand, my childrens’ accomplishments were none of their business. LOL. Leaves them unfulfilled to not know who is doing better. :))
I’ve been on both sides. I feel the jealous twinges sometimes, which I am somewhat ashamed to admit, but I’m working on it (have been for awhile with five kids 
), and do try to get past it so I can be genuinely happy for others when their kids achieve things. Partly because it really does suck to have something good happen in my own family and then realize that people that I assumed would be excited/happy for me – aren’t. So, at some point,I decided that if my kid didn’t get the part or whatever, that I would be happy that a friend’s kid did. Why not? In our family, depression is an issue. But I don’t advertise that. So, I guess our lives might look pretty rosy sometimes to people who don’t know our family all that well.
And I’ve noticed that FB is a mixed bag for me. If I am feeling blue, then yes, sometimes I do look at all the pictures that everyone posts and wonder what is wrong with my life. But, if I am feeling in a good mood, then everything I see – even the most outrageous bragging – makes me smile.So much depends on what lens I am looking through. Some people post lots of videos of their kids on FB that I watch for a couple of seconds and think “how nice”, but every once in a while someone posts something which, I suppose some would consider bragging, but really is special. For instance, a friend of mine who lives far away posted a video of her son running hurdles – he literally ran away from the pack and it turns out that he is one of the best runners in the state. It was such a beautiful thing to watch. I had no idea the kid was so talented. I was really moved. This friend has cancer. One of her goals is to live long enough to see this kid graduate high school. Another friend of mine, who, I am embarrassed to say, I used to find annoying a long time ago when our daughters were in kindergarten together, died suddenly of pancreatic cancer. It was about six weeks from diagnosis to death. Makes me wonder why I feel jealous about any of it.
Having said that, the poster who mentioned that someone who she didn’t know well tracked down her phone number to brag, and the other poster who mentioned the bragging emails – yeah, that strikes me as just plain odd. It is kind of sad, really, when you have to go to that much trouble to brag about something.
And, it really does suck that college is so expensive and finances play such a big part in the decisions. Wish that weren’t an issue for anyone. And I wish that people didn’t make the assumptions they make about community colleges. They can be a very useful way to basically cut the costs of a college degree in half. And, besides, at the time of this writing, my youngest seems on track for community college. She needs time to figure it out. A lot of kids do.
Parents SHOULD be proud of all of their kids, no matter their abilities. As long as the child is working hard and to their own potential, that is all we can ask. I have three, including one on the spectrum. I am most proud when they do their best.
And I agree about community colleges. Some of the best teachers I’ve ever had were at a cc. Good luck!