Prom Dilemma

<p>In advance: I get that this “dilemma” may seem ridiculous, but it’s been bothering me. If you’re only here to be sarcastic, move along. First off, I’m a girl. I’ve been thinking a lot lately about my HS Prom for some reason, and how it’s going to work out for me. </p>

<p>Let’s just say that I will not have a date. Not a lot of people really go to Prom with dates at my school, most people just go with large groups.</p>

<p>I mainly hang out with three other girls who, let’s just say, are very anti-school event and pretty much everything-event. They hardly ever even go out. Which means I hardly ever hang out with them outside of school. We have a lot of fun when we’re together, and we’re good friends. But for some reason it never seems like they want to chill on the weekends.</p>

<p>My best friend, Jane, is heavily involved in student gov’t so she is on an acquaintance-level with a lot of people. Plus Jane has a friend, Sue who has a lot of friends that Jane kind of knows. Jane will likely be going to the Prom with Sue and her friends. One of the friends that Sue will be going with in this group is Mary, a girl whom I have personally been friends with for a long time but only hang out with outside of school. (Yes, I’m sorry this is confusing.) The thing is: I do know Jane, Sue, and Mary. But I feel uncomfortable with asking to go along with them to the Prom, because chances are they won’t bother to see if I want to go with them. Personally Sue and Mary are nice but VERY cliquey. And I could be wrong, my best friend Jane might not even go with Jane and Mary’s group of friends (probably about 10). </p>

<p>Now, one of my anti-social event friends, Kate, has been insinuating things about her prom dress every so often. For all this time in HS, she has been saying how Prom is stupid and how she doesn’t want to go, and I’ve been the one trying to convince her to go because, of course, I want people to go with! And this is where it gets even more confusing. Paula, who is a member of the Sue/Mary clique knows Kate on an acquaintance-level and for some reason to me (though I don’t know for sure) it seems like Kate is planning on going with the Sue/Mary group because of the way she talks to Paula. (I don’t know how I know this exactly, but… it just seems like it. I could be wrong though.) The bad part about it is that I don’t think that Paula likes me. At all. She’s always been very sarcastic to me. First of all, it kind of hurts me that Kate wouldn’t even want to think of me first to go to Prom with me and the other two girls we usually hang out with at school (if they even want to go…). But, I could be wrong… Kate might be thinking that she and I will still go together.</p>

<p>AGH. This was long, and whiney-sounding… but, my final question is: What should I do? I can’t go to Prom alone obviously and I can’t go with just one person. I feel weird about asking Mary if I can go with their group to the Prom because I know some folks in their group don’t like me much. But I think that my two best friends, Jane and Kate, are going with this clique. I feel like I’m just going to end up alone, not even going to Prom. </p>

<p>But the fact of the matter is that I don’t even CARE about Prom that much. I just want to go so that people won’t ask me later, “Why didn’t you goooooo?” “Where are your Prom pictures?” And then assume I didn’t have any friends or a date to go with and start to think I’m a loser. But then I think, maybe by that time I’ll be so happy about going to college that I won’t care about this petty Prom stuff.</p>

<p>Basically, I’m a socially awkward person. Please help by letting me know what you think.</p>

<p>Bump!</p>

<p>10char</p>

<p>Could you, like, draw a diagram of all these people and their relationships or something?</p>

<p>^lololol</p>

<p>I went to prom stag for 3 years (I went with friends senior year). No one cares who you go to prom with. Really.</p>

<p>I don’t know where high schoolers get this illusion that prom dates/groups matter. Perhaps TV or movies.</p>

<p>Stop giving a damn about what other people think.</p>

<p>God. HSL is filled with people making posts dealing with them caring about what others think. STOP. PLEASE.</p>

<p>^Impossible.</p>

<p>How could you go to prom when you weren’t a senior unless taken by a senior?</p>

<p>I am a mom, but I totally got what you were saying, I am used to follow my girs’ complicated social life in high school and college. </p>

<p>I would have a talk with Jane, the best friend. Ask her what she is doing about the prom, and let her know that you would like to go with her (and her friends). If she is your best friend, she wouldn’t mind to have you come along. If Kate happens to be able to get herself into that group, then it’s great, otherwise I wouldn’t worry about (it’s not like she is worried about you).</p>

<p>1) At my school, prom is junior/senior, not just senior.
2) I shadowed/help the prom committee freshman/sophomore year (because I was the prom director in 11th grade). So I got tickets for helping.</p>

<p>You lost me the moment you introduced Paula…</p>

<p>No one wants to go to prom without a date. It’s just weird. I mean, how are you going to feel when all of your friends are off taking pictures and whatnot with their dates while you tag along as the dateless loser 500th wheel? I’m guessing that it’s not an ideal situation, especially at my school where you’re pretty much guaranteed a miserable time if you don’t have a prom date.</p>

<p>bump :b. This thread is like War and Peace in post form (if you’ve read War and Peace and seen how many different groups/characters there are, you’ll know what I mean)</p>

<p>Yes, I get that the post is long. I get that it’s pathetic. But it’s really not that hard to figure out if you actually read it. If you don’t want to, I don’t care. I would genuinely like some help. </p>

<p>@hi<em>im</em>leila, I said that all of the people mentioned in the post will not have dates. Before making a statement, you might want to read what I said first. Or don’t read it, and click out of the thread. </p>

<p>It’s really not that difficult, guys.</p>

<p>on the one hand, I doubt that Sue, et al. will resent you joining them
on the other, it may be hard to ask them for fear of rejection, etc.</p>

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<p>You need to change your perspective. If you think you’re going to have a bad time, you will. You don’t have to have a date to hang out with your friends.</p>

<p>Or dance all by yourself. It’s fun. And people will see you’re having fun and then dance with you.</p>

<p>Prom is awesome, even if you don’t have a date. ^Like fuzz said. It can be a lil awkward during slow dances, but really that’s it. (according to some of my friends)</p>

<p>And at least you probably don’t prom themes that get a TON of highly religious people angry.
[John</a> Burroughs High School’s prom invitation pushes the envelope | Parents Talk Back | STLtoday](<a href=“http://www.stltoday.com/blogzone/parents-talk-back/parents-talk-back/2009/03/john-burroughs-high-schools-prom-invitation-pushes-the-envelope/]John”>http://www.stltoday.com/blogzone/parents-talk-back/parents-talk-back/2009/03/john-burroughs-high-schools-prom-invitation-pushes-the-envelope/)</p>

<p>(It was a joke and the seniors had no idea it would be such a BIG DEAL…)</p>

<p>To the OP: I wasn’t replying to your post, but rather what other people said following it. Sorry about that, but you don’t need to get all ****y just because I responded in a way you didn’t like.</p>

<p>You don’t need dates in prom, that is SOOOO long ago.
It’s better going with friends than some gf/bf granted that you and your friends are in good terms. I say, just talk to your friend that is best comfortable with you and hang with “her” group. If not, you could always talk to your acquaintance and have a good time.
Proms are your memories, not others.</p>

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<p>Okay. Good. So just don’t go. Stop basing your self-worth off of other’s opinions of yourself. And you’re over-complicating things; it’s not as complicated as you’d like to think.</p>

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<p>Hahahaha. I wish that would not have been a joke. This is great!</p>

<p>What generation are you living in where kids are named Jane, Sue, Paula, and Mary? The 60’s are over.</p>