Puddle of Pee

Parent Cafe
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<p>Cur;</p>

<p>You are going through what we are somewhat going though. Just when I thought things would slow down, it doesn’t.</p>

<p>D has USC presidential interview next week March 8-9 for probable half tuition offer, then we just got in the mail an invite to view the honors program at UC San Diego March 9, which we will miss because we are already committed to the USC interview. </p>

<p>March 11, the day after the USC interview ends, we have been asked to go to UC Irvine to attend their Honors days, and are in the running for their regent’s scholarship (possible full tuition). </p>

<p>March 17-19, D and H are flying to Dallas for the McDermott scholarship weekend. </p>

<p>April 8 - 17 , we are flying to the East Coast for a “vacation”/visit colleges trip:

  1. to NC to view UNC Chapel Hill where D got accepted (no scholarship offers though), plan to talk to ad com, visit classes, etc
  2. will also visit Duke (D not accepted there yet),
  3. visit TCNJ,
  4. visit NY colleges of D #2 who may want to go to NY for school,
  5. and also visit Wash DC Phila, etc for the rest of the family. </p>

<p>We come home on Monday 4/17 ( missing that day of school) just in time for D to attend a mandatory tech rehearsal 3- 9 pm for a school performing dance production she is in that Wed 4/19</p>

<p>Now to make things busier, D just got a Lead dancer part in “Beauty and the Beast” at a regional youth Theatre company (25 roles in the musical – or 50 total, as it has a double cast. 250 kids auditioned). D#2 is also in the play in the ensemble. The play opens during finals week, which won’t impact Senior D much as her finals will be over and doesn’t really “count”, but will affect Sophomore daughter’s finals esp since she is taking hard classes like AP European History, Pre Calc, Engl Honors, Spanish, Honors Bio and 2 performing arts classes.</p>

<p>So now, play rehearsals are going to be juggled with scholarship days/ weekends, and senior end of the year stuff. . .</p>

<p>AND then when I thought everything would slow down because this process is almost over because college decision time is almost here – 15 year old D#2 (sophomore) does well on her PSATS (207 first try–at this point good enough score to be a commended National Merit scholar) </p>

<p>–and now D#2 is on lots of the colleges radar screen and is now getting more college info in the mail than D#1 (D#2 got 7 pieces of mail from colleges yesterday to D#1 getting 5)</p>

<p>AND the college process starts again once anew. . . sigh. (and with 4 kids 2 years apart, it isn’t going to end any time soon).</p>

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<p>I am sorry. Every time I visit this site I just laugh that this post and its title sit on the front page of the parent’s forum…And Cur, just try to enjoy. It’s going to turn out great.</p>

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<p>I am thrilled to read of the incontinence of your family!!</p>

<p>Whooooo Hoooo!</p>

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<p>Believe me. I commiserate! You and D will make it through. At least, that’s what I keep telling myself. </p>

<p>This is a crazy time of year for us. Son has been gone 11-12 hours a day with final rehearsals for his play. (People always talk about athletes having good organizational skills to survive, but theater kids face the same problem without the incentive of college recruitment.) He leaves for a four-day weekend at Rochester in early March on a scholarship interview (also wanted to spend a shabbat at Hillel). I have a feeling he’ll be visiting multiple campuses in April.</p>

<p>Meanwhile, he is getting ready for his senior trip by filling out lots of paperwork and taking a special class. This is a big, big deal because most of the senior class–with help from the school, the Jewish community, and parents who’ve planned for this for years --travels to Israel in May on a program through the Alexander Muss high school outside of Tel Aviv. They leave on May 1 and don’t return till graduation, which is the end of the month. He’ll take his AP’s over in Israel. </p>

<p>I just hope son knows where he’s going to college by that time, or we will be in a pretty pickle, trying to figure things out long distance. When we started this process, he thought he knew what school he wanted to go to as well as his major. Would you believe me if I told you, he is now unsure about both? He is considering a switch from bio/premed to the humanities: history of science, classics, philosophy, Egyptology, or ancient studies. (I know plenty of kids switch in college. I wonder how many switch before they even make it into college!) And I don’t think he’ll make a final decision on where he’s going until all the cards are on the table (three acceptances and a likely so far).</p>

<p>Any other seniors out there who are this confused?</p>

<p>I am very glad for two things: son did not apply anywhere ED, and he did not apply to any BA/MD programs. I’m sure your daughter has her head together and really knows what she wants. I wish her all the luck in the world on her great “reach” program at Texas Tech. She deserves the best…and so does her kind hearted, curmudgeon dad!</p>

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<p>C, just keep me posted on the playoffs. I know that everything else will fall into place. When there is a conflict, I know it must be painful – but making the decisions of which great opportunity to possibly forego is one of those character building moments we’re all supposed to want for our kids. I’ve noticed that <em>watching</em> the character building moment is much more painful than participating in it.</p>

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<p>“just keep me posted on the playoffs.”</p>

<p>We will soon know if a little bit Hanna & Anna got the best of Lorena. Sounds like that annoying mambo song that found a new lease on life in a recent commercial. :slight_smile: </p>

<p>As I just read yesterday, it seems that most Texans do salivate at the sight of a football or basketball. When it comes to high school hoops in Texas, parents do a lot more than salivating, they are dying in the stands. At least, they no longer hire killers to shoot the competition down.</p>

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<p><<at least,=“” they=“” no=“” longer=“” hire=“” killers=“” to=“” shoot=“” the=“” competition=“” down=“”>></at></p>

<p>Only if it involves Cheerleading squad, if I recall correctly.</p>

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<p>C-Mudge …</p>

<p>Congratulations and best of luck to your D and the whole C-Mudge clan.</p>

<p>No offense intended, but isn’t anyone on this thread and other similar threads (“when should I turn down my many other scholarships,” etc.) bothered just a wee bit by the tone of these threads? Or if not by the tone, then by devoting too much time and energy to them? There are so many kids striving to get into a college they feel is special for them … only to be heartbroken when a school in essence tells them “you’re not wanted.” Others explore their college options, only to wind-up with zero or few options because of the idiosyncrasies of the financial aid system and their inability to have either the stats or other factors making them desireable merit aid candidates. I honestly haven’t thought about it at great length, but it seems to me that there is a not-so-fine line between good-spirited congratulations and information sharing … AND … for lack of a better phrase, gracefully thanking your lucky stars. This isn’t directed at you as a personal attack of any sort … I’m just raising for the collective consciousness the question of whether we as a group should have perhaps a bit more sensitivity?</p>

<p>I might be totally on an island here. I’ve long known I’ve got too many parts “lone wolf” and too few parts “group sharer” in my make-up. But at the risk of appearing hypocritical by even mentioning it, my son chose between three merit offers a couple of years ago, my daughter is currently sitting on two significant merit opportunities with at least one more hopefully forthcoming, so I do know that these “embarrassment of riches” can in a very real sense create “problems” of their own. Understood. But apart from a public mention or two, aren’t these kind of extended discussions best kept 1:1, or private? Isn’t it like the CEO complaining in front of the hourly “help” about how tired his arms are because he played 20 rounds of golf on his 10-day Hawaiian vacation? Or, the young doctors and lawyers complaining in front of their “cleaning ladies” about what a pain it is doing all of the maintenance on their BMW’s and Jaguars?</p>

<p>I know I don’t have to read threads like this … or participate … and I generally don’t. It’s arguably about nothing more than style and personal choice in how to conduct your life. But, I’m also the old-school sports fan who dislikes the attention grabbing, self-congratulatory ways of the modern athlete. You see 6-8 year old little leaguers today acting that way … pointing skyward for every achievement (funny how nobody does this when they strike out) … demanding to be called “da man.” I’m just a believer in that old saw: “Act like you’ve been there before.” Anyway, my intent is not to preach or tell anybody to adopt my way of thinking; rather, just presenting something others might want to consider.</p>

<p>Honestly, in no sense am I trying to rain on anybody’s parade. Congratulations to all on their hard-earned and well-deserved achievements.</p>

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<p>I think this thread goes back to posts and questions Curm had last year at this time and probably earlier. He asked many of the senior parents how do you handle and plan for overlaps between big-time high school EC’s and scholarship interviews. There were many discussions and possible scenerios talked about.</p>

<p>Basically it was left with a wait and see if those problems occur and then deal with them. So the situation has happened as Curm thought it might and now he is illuminating to fellow posters that yes indeed it can and will happen. Also sheds light for those with juniors and sophomores.</p>

<p>Some of us, like dudediligence choose to keep their time conflicts and prioritizing to themselves while others choose to share. Just a difference in style. Same with those posting on the master list of acceptances, my son didn’t mind me posting his and yet his older sister (senior last year) did not want hers mentioned. Just different preferences, not meant to slight others just different.</p>

<p>If there are those out there that do feel bad about their choices and results then this is a good place to be. There is more discussion, advice, suggestions and strategy on this site to make sure that doesn’t happen. Safeties are recommended, financial and academic, solutions for aid and merit. Schools mentioned that others have not considered. Sites listed for schools still accepting students, and more helpful advice to avoid utter disappointment.</p>

<p>And yet even more advice for those wanting or needing gap years and how to make lemonade out of lemons.</p>

<p>So no, I don’t think this thread is insensitive. I think it is information. </p>

<p>It is up to the reader what to do with that information.</p>

<p>Kat</p>

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<p>DudeDilegence,</p>

<p>Your point is well taken. People need to be careful how they phrase both their good and bad news. What is a good day or week for one family is a bad one for another. </p>

<p>And yet part of the value of this forum is that you forge real human bonds with people. Part of the forging of those bonds is sharing the good things and the bad. I had heartfelt congratulations expressed in both the public forum and by pm when son was admitted to his earliest school EA. I’ve also had concerns and condolences express when he failed to get merit money at a particular school where it seemed he might be a likely candidate. My son also posts independently on this site (less frequently than I do), and he’s had a similar experience. </p>

<p>Part of the problem is this. So often, you can’t share these things with others around you in “real life”. Yes, you can talk to your significant other. Yes, you can talk to your son or daughter. But it’s a lot more difficult to talk with other moms and dads in your own local community unless they’re personal friends. Too often it comes off as either “crowing” or “complaining”. When I signed up to post on CC, I did so expecting to hear what happened to applicants, the good and the bad. If I don’t want to read a particular post or thread, I just scroll on by. </p>

<p>The other reality is that, whether we like it or not, there are lots more kids trying to get into schools and some of them will be disappointed. I wish I had a magic wand to change that. Meanwhile, it helps to learn what works and what doesn’t, and just what it’s like to go through this process. Cur’s post and many others help to tell us that.</p>

<p>The truth is this. If the main or only value of CC was the information it conveyed, I would probably spend a lot less time here (and I spend less time than many). I’ve met some interesting people here, and I’ve had a chance to talk about some things that simply wouldn’t have happened in real life. It’s allowed me to get some negatives off my chest and move on, or to put some achievements in realistic perspective. To do that, people have to feel free to post about both the positives and negatives. I read Cur’s post and smiled in recognition that someone else’s family is going through the same craziness as ours, although our situations may be slightly different ! I guess the kind of things you’re describing don’t bother me to the same degree as they do you.</p>

<p>Still, it is a good point to remember. The “crunch time” of April 1 is coming closer. As you say, there will be happy and sad families (more of the former, I hope), and we need to be careful how we express things.</p>

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<p>I have to say I look forward to catching up on Cur’s posts as they strike a lot of chords (see several other parents chiming in with tales from other athletes and dancers who were peaking as leaders in their high schools but who also had merit academic interviews crowding their last hs season and the search for the best merit package as a big factor). It is all so hard to sort out–which adult to please this day, this hour, this week out of many fine adults offering your S or D a chance, an interview, an invitation. and for my family…we became so attached and appreciative of some of the fine people at several of my son’s schools that it was emotionally wrenching to make a decision. (I know the colleges are thriving just fine thank you without him, but we still miss some of those alternative futures.) My kid also won a state title in the last hurrah of high school that sent him to a national competition during AP exam week in May and further reduced his ability to focus on the issues at hand.<br>
it was not the “norm” in my neck of the woods (or in our family) to apply to any schools outside of the region, so we also endured some flack that S was “so busy” with trips etc., and was conflicted most of April re final choice when everyone else had come to earlier final choices. Accepted student days are interesting events. Many furrowed brows and grateful but not sure looking young adults milling about. All of those days go down in our family history as happy shared passages.
You know the headlines are sometimes just so sad every morning. But some of the best Americans are working in our rather vibrant college system.
hang in there and keep us posted Cur. April is the the quiet month ahead where you have only the task of saying goodbye to some lovely invitations, and let your D claim her class place for Class of 2010.<br>
I think Parents Forum is an AOK place to deal with the dizzy midway point as well as to talk about disappointments, waitlists and rejections.</p>

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<p>Katwkittens …</p>

<p>I 100% agree about the value of information. Information is power. My CC nom de plume means just that. I think CC is the most unbelievable college resource ever … and very often, the parents board portion of the site is the very best part of CC.</p>

<p>Having said that, I do think there are times when some additional sensitivity might be in order. My “diatribe” was not meant to single-out C-Mudge, or this particular thread … on this day, it was simply the thread which generated my response.</p>

<p>I agree with you that it’s about style. Hey … I often wish I were more communally “touchy-feely” in my style. I didn’t mention my points to start a debate or to convince others, simply a “for what it’s worth” observation about some of what we do being a wee bit insensitive. That’s just my opinion. I respect yours.</p>

<p>Out of respect for not hijacking C-Mudge’s thread (and for CC’s bandwidth), I’m not going to engage in board debate about what is ultimately just a personal preference issue. Live and let live, eh? If anyone feels really strongly about my idiosyncratic views, you know where to find me via PM.</p>

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<p>Gosh! We triple posted at 10:42 a.m. Great minds must think in tandem. ;)</p>

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<p>Cur – What delightful pee problems! I do hope today feels better and that the family is enjoying D’s athletic spotlight. We all knew these challenges awaited Little Mudge but the reality is often more acute than the anticipation. I am confident that wherever she lands, she will excel and have great opportunities and you will eventually be able to breathe and sleep normally. </p>

<p>And about the propriety of sharing these types of problems, I must say that I much appreciate and have gained valuable information from both the “bad” problems (safety first!) and the “good” problems (embarassment of riches and how to be in 3 places at once because everyone wants you). I read more than post but cannot thank you (and other parents) enough for sharing your journeys in detail – the good, the bad, and the ugly! CC has played a very important role in my D’s college screening and selection process. As an academic, I thought I knew a bit about this, but I had no idea how much I didn’t know!</p>

<p>Thank you for this post and all the others that have benefited (and amused) so many of us. Best of luck as y’all muddle through the puddle!</p>

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<p>Over the year that I have been on this site I see often the dichotomy between those who are here for information alone, and those who are here for companionship and information, and those who are here for emotional support and companionship and information. I hope there’s room for all of us. And I do find that the moderators do a very good job of coralling us. Hence the single threads for all acceptances. Hence the Cafe. Hence Sinner’s Alley in the Cafe. </p>

<p>There are also those larger than life characters who somehow provide a saga that even though it’s personal and emotional becomes iconic. And valuable.</p>

<p>And now back to our regularly scheduled broadcast.</p>

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<p>DudeDiliigence, I will try to get both 1) a grip and 2) a life. I <em>knew</em> that I was going down a slippery slope as I composed the post , and I thought I had made that pretty clear by my introduction. I am nothing if not self-aware. When you have as many foibles as I have you become enlightened fairly early. So? What to do? Hey, I figured I had already gone a long way the road, no use turning back now. Sorry if offended anyone’s notion of fair play. As I said in the post, we realize that there are hundreds of equally deserving kids who have not been given a fair shake. It was not my intention , and it has never been my intention to place my daughter above them. It has only only my wish that she be considered beside them. </p>

<p>Now I’m off to the play-offs for two days to embarrass my daughter and her team horribly with a variety of yells and rythmic chants. Hanna Anna, Bo-nana…</p>

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<p>As another who reads this board much more than I post, I just want to second musicmomic’s thoughts. I really enjoy reading about Mudgette and the other “regulars”, and in no way do I consider it bragging. Everyone here has been really beneficial in helping me understand the process, and I think that all this information, whether the result is happy or sad, is very valuable.</p>

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<p>Cur–lot’s of us are enjoying the story—please keep telling it.</p>

<p>And go, Mudgette!</p>

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<p>Me too. Love following the stories of those who are willing to share the details of their journeys (or shall I say in this case, accompanying their kids on their journeys). Besides, this is a unique time in one’s life, when there are lots of possibilities. It is fascinating to see how different people make their choices among them. Fascinating. And then you throw in dead cats and papa peeing and what all, and it makes for irresistable reading . . . Cur you could write quite an entertaining college counseling guide book should you choose to!</p>

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<p>Just wanted to pipe in and say congrats to Mudgette and relate my S’s saga.
He got called Wed by one of his top choice schools to say they had an unexpected opening to interview for their top Out of State scholarship and he was next on the list…could he fly down this Saturday and stay till Monday?Well yeah,for more free $ plus a laptop here he comes.Only had to rearrange one appointment and miss one day of school,not too bad.
Then believe it or not, this morning another U called,prob his #5 choice out of 5 (due to location…cold…)saying they now had an opening to interview for their top scholarship…out of the blue…we havent heard from them since the acceptance…not even about their Honors College…is he available the last weekend in March? This one is harder to arrange…it conflicts with his Key Club convention where he is an outgoing senior State officer…so if he decides to go to the U he misses that altogether…according to their admissions person,their interview cant be rearranged.
So there may be more kids scrambling their schedules in the next few days as some kids decide (gracefully in my eyes,as a recipient) to let some of their college choices know they will be declining scholarship offers.</p>