<p>"I’m glad to see you don’t lump booze and pot into the f up yer life category either. Funny, I do. So am I really liberal or really conservative? "</p>
<p>We are SO in agreement! I’ve always said that parents who tell their kids to stay off drugs, with cigarette or drink in hand, don’t have much credibility.</p>
<p>Pot can totally f*** up the life too. It’s just not as blatant and it takes longer.</p>
<p>Careful, people are going to think we’re dating ;)</p>
<p>“I am going to hope that you did not intend this to be the highly offensive implication it came across as.”</p>
<p>I meant it as a humorous illustration of my skepticism that a child would ever tell a decent parent about one-time cocaine use, at least until many years later. It was not an accusation, and I’m sorry if it appeared to be.</p>
<p>Although I don’t use pot myself, I believe that booze and pot can be used in ways that bring very minimal physical danger, although there may be more or less significant legal consequences that need to be carefully considered. For example, if you drink two beers a week, the danger of becoming an alcoholic is close to nil. With those substances, then, my question is: is this use responsible, or is it reckless? How severe is this problem? Some pot and alcohol use requires drastic action in my book and some does not. (Now that I think about it, this also applies to sex.)</p>
<p>Use of some other substances, IMHO, is inherently reckless. And those are the ones where, if they were brought to my attention, I would take action to prevent a repeat of that behavior.</p>
<p>My question is, is there any news about your child that would cause you to bring him home from college immediately and cut off future funds if he didn’t stop some behavior?</p>
<p>Hanna,</p>
<p>Of course an Ambien isn’t going to land you in jail as quickly as a narcotic. But the punishment surrounding misuse of narcotics (opiates, including morphine and vicodin) can be quite severe.</p>
<p>And when it comes to federal hiring, for one, I know for a fact that they frown upon prescription misuse just as much. </p>
<p>The point I’m making is that we’re so quick to damn people for using coke but we usually overlook misuse of vicodin or other opiates. They demonstrate very similar tendencies in the individual-- need for the opiate high. Parents that would pull in a heartbeat over coke but not narcotic abuse are doing their children a disservice based on demonization of the former and not the latter.</p>
<p>I agree, although you seemed to be directing your comments at me, and I think I mentioned pages ago that I consider artificial opiates like oxycodone to be among the most dangerous drugs.</p>
<p>“And when it comes to federal hiring, for one, I know for a fact that they frown upon prescription misuse just as much.”</p>
<p>This is true if the prescription misuse is, say, Vicodin addiction, or falsifying prescriptions to get drugs. A wife handing an extra sleeping pill to a husband who forgot his is not going to prevent him from becoming an AUSA, even though it’s technically against the law. (On the other hand, one use of marijuana and he’s toast, if he admits it.)</p>
<p><a href=“On%20the%20other%20hand,%20one%20use%20of%20marijuana%20and%20he’s%20toast,%20if%20he%20admits%20it.”>quote</a>
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<p>Not really. FBI policy allows for 15 uses of marijuana. CIA is a little less lenient.</p>
<p>State is almost uncaring until you started working.</p>
<p>DEA is once or twice, but preferably never.</p>
<p>[Trust</a> me](<a href=“http://www.fbi.gov/employment/policies.htm]Trust”>http://www.fbi.gov/employment/policies.htm), I’m going through a clearance.</p>
<p>why is pot seen as so evil? I don;t get it. We are a drugged up nation, and we get freaked out because of pot…hypocritical</p>
<p>a person can have ten drinks a day, and that passes muster, but a few joints?</p>
<p>wonder how many DEA agents drink, take medications, etc…hmmmmm</p>
<p>CGM,</p>
<p>Actually, ten drinks a day would probably get you a ticket out of most federal employment…</p>
<p>you get my point though…ten joints in a lifetime…and pot ain’t as bad</p>
<p>“why is pot seen as so evil? I don;t get it. We are a drugged up nation, and we get freaked out because of pot”</p>
<p>The government can’t tax pot and condoning its use would shame the tolerant Harry J. Ansliger’s memory. Silly :).</p>
<p>I don’t happen to agree that marijuana is as innocuous as some would like to believe
<a href=“http://www.schizophrenia.com/sznews/archives/002684.html[/url]”>http://www.schizophrenia.com/sznews/archives/002684.html</a></p>
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<p>People don’t seem to be rushing in to answer this question, which Hanna has asked a couple of times now.</p>
<p>Charles Bronson and Graucho Marx both had mustaches and both died of pneumonia, does that mean that their mustaches caused pneumonia? These are unsubstantial and all encompasing statements. If the doctors who conducted the reserach were able to pinpoint the exact reasoning for the marijuana user’s inclined suceptiblitiy towards physchotic disorders, then their assertions may retain more weight. To simply state that they are crazy and “smoked pot” at one stage in their life is not proof enough to validate their postulations though.</p>
<p>I think drugs are far more prevalent than we would think, even at schools with a non-party reputation. We all know alcohol is readily available, but from stories of my kids and their friends, pot is every where, readily available at many different schools. Some kids with very straight-laced upbringings go crazy, some stay with their roots. Some kids give it a try once or twice, some develop a habit.</p>
<p>I would be incredibly angered and scared on so many levels if my kid was using drugs- from the “how did you pay for it when you’re always broke?” to “what is it doing to your grades?” to “what about your future jobs?” to “what does this mean? are you experimenting or addicted? Is it college fun or a problem?” I’ve no experience to know if there is such a thing as harmless drug use, I cannot see when it would be okay, yet many now successful adults have admitted usage- even if they did not inhale 
so it must be possible to have dabbled and survive.</p>
<p>Hanna- I would think grades dropping, being arrested, any way the parents might find out about the drug use through an outside source, any other serious indicators of the drugs would be reasons to assume being away at school was not the right place to be. I would be more concerned with my kids life than the current status of the degree and I would not be thinking about withholding funds as punishment, I would be thinking my kid was messed up and needed help and make an executive decision to not continue away at school in that environment. Whomever said that some one who wants drugs is going to find them wherever they go is right, so if your son or daughter has a problem, they have to want help to change.</p>
<p>There are definitely various campus groups- clubs, sports teams, Greek, etc- probably different groups on different campuses- who will be known for providing substances. I have head stories of certain groups who are friends of the hookah, others are into pot and one story about a group which passes on info about meth as a study aid- keeping you up and keeping you skinny. I believe that the diet drugs of the 60s were a meth-related substance, yet the nasty, who’ knows what is in it, street stuff people get now are so scary. Can’t you just see some silly group of girls who do not happen to be addicted, but who want to stay up all night studying and be skinny, taking meth to help them with no understanding of the potential consequences :eek:</p>
<p>“People don’t seem to be rushing in to answer this question, which Hanna has asked a couple of times now.”</p>
<p>Sorry finishing up some paperwork. The answer is I don’t know. I mean now we can imagine anything from “dad I killed somebody” to “dad I really killed today.” “dad I won the lotto and I don’t need your money anymore.”</p>
<p>The both of you please stop trying to play I’m a more moral parent than you because I will tolerate less. Different methods, which one is right on, depends on which one works. Would I consider yours, yes I would, it’s not an impossible position to take. It’s going to depend on the child and the relationship. I have kids with stubborn streaks, so utilmatums fall on deaf ears. However, they do listen to honest advice and consider it. So, If I’m going to demand this and that, I have to be prepared to follow through. I wouldn’t disown either kid for trying something. A mommentary laspe of judgement shouldn’t create a permanent relationship consquence.</p>
<p>Opie and leal…rock on!!! I have a feeling that if I were your child, I’d never touch drugs. Too bad I’m not your child. (Of course, this is all hypothetical, obviously I don’t do them, etc.)</p>
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<p>Don’t think anyone stated or implied that. It was the OP regarding cocaine. Some here have seemingly avoided the question. If the answer is “I’d have a talk with him/her” that’s fine; it’s your choice. I think some of us were wondering if some here would take more drastic action depending on the circumstances. For example, it sounds as if lealdragon might do more than have a talk if the situation involved meth.</p>
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<p>So it’s the <em>relationship</em> that’s of primary importance? I agree that it takes a lot of courage to take a stand with your kids.</p>
<p>“To simply state that they are crazy and “smoked pot” at one stage in their life is not proof enough to validate their postulations though.”</p>
<p>They probably ate meat and drank sodas too.</p>
<hr>
<p>“so it must be possible to have dabbled and survive.”</p>
<p>Oh, most definitely. And, back in the 70s, I’d say at least half the kids in school got high. So, where are those people now? A lot of them are right here on this forum but not all of them are admitting it.</p>
<p>I think pot is the least dangerous of all the drugs. It is FAR less dangerous than alcohol and cigarettes. However, it is far from benign. Well, it’s RELATIVELY benign when COMPARED to other drugs, but that doesn’t make it benign. Occasional use isn’t a big deal, but it is oh so easy to get emotionally dependent on it. Mary Jane is such a sweet and seductive mistress! It has some positive benefits, like relaxation for someone who is highly stressed. But, there is a price to be paid: It most definitely does affect motivation, emotional stability, and clarity of thought. So, it’s not a killer drug, just a ‘makes ya kinda stupid’ drug.</p>
<p>And college isn’t the place to be stupid.</p>
<p>“I think some of us were wondering if some here would take more drastic action depending on the circumstances.”</p>
<p>I’d have a talk and then decide from there what is the appropriate action, rather than automatically implementing a preset consequence.</p>
<p>“For example, it sounds as if lealdragon might do more than have a talk if the situation involved meth.”</p>
<p>You’re da***d right I’d do more if it was something like meth. Would I pull him out of school? I really don’t know. School would be the least of my concerns.</p>
<p>“Opie and leal…rock on!!! I have a feeling that if I were your child, I’d never touch drugs. Too bad I’m not your child. (Of course, this is all hypothetical, obviously I don’t do them, etc.)”</p>
<p>Hey, thanks!!! That’s the sweetest thing anyone has ever said to me on this forum!</p>