<p>I need a little clarity here, if anyone would be kind enough to help. My father died unexpectedly several days ago and I’m not thinking as clearly as I should. Zoosergirl has received her final acceptance and has narrowed the choice down to two schools. Both are fine schools and we are grateful for the options. </p>
<p>School A: State school,
Pros: five year master’s program that would give her undergrad degree in content area, master’s in secondary education and certification to teach. With scholarship, we can afford the whole deal (small loans for us, but certainly not crippling – could pay in cash but don’t want to stretch at least at first) so she will have zero debt and not have to apply for graduate school because she will already be there (as long as she teaches).<br>
Cons: Program is intense, scholarship requires 3.3 GPA (but we could still afford comfortably without scholarship.) Program is regimented and accelerated so no room for exploration or taking classes because she wants to. The program is wonderful, but the school is less of a “fit.” ZG doesn’t love it but is a bloom where you’re planted girl. The school is pretty far away, but not too terrible of a trip, but she will eventually need a car.</p>
<p>Definitely the practical choice.</p>
<p>School B: Private LAC
Pros: This is the school of her heart. She loves it, we love it. She received some very nice scholarships and the GPA requirement is only 2.5. Since it’s a regular undergrad program, she would have some flexibilty to explore and possibly change her major. It’s about 90 minutes away on an easy trip and is in a small city so no car is necessary. It has the program that is her second choice for major and to which she may really be called. It’s also a small school and so a better fit for her personality. Our church is based in this town and she is deeply religious.</p>
<p>Cons: Money. In order for this to be affordable, she would have to contribute about $4000 per year from her earnings (she has a good job) and take about $500 per month in debt when she leaves school. The caveat to that is that our community college has a really good master’s program that she could complete for very little money while either living at home or working during the day. Having a bio degree would allow her that flexibility. In her specialty (unless the rules change of course), she would be eligible to get most (if not all) of her loans forgiven after teaching for five years. She would have to seek out and apply to graduate school separately, along with the testing involved.</p>
<p>Zoosermom, I’m so sorry about your father. My father died about 18 months ago so I have some idea of what you are going through.</p>
<p>As for your daughter’s decision, I would vote for door number 2. It sounds as if both schools offer a path to her current career choice, but the state college locks her in to this path. If she loves the second school, and would not find it too onerous to work enough to invest $4k/year in her education, then I don’t see a real downside. If age 17 isn’t the time to follow your heart and keep your options open, when is the time?</p>
<p>zoosermom I am very sorry to hear about the unexpected death of your father. I can certainly understand that you are feeling somewhat foggy of mind at this time and wish you and your family the strength and comfort you so need.
Clarification needed:
When your daughter leaves school when will she start to have to repay her loans (after she completes her masters or after undergrad).If she takes her time with her masters and teaches while she is going is there a chance (if the rule stays the same) that she will not have to repay her loan at all or will she be repaying a good portion of it? How many years will it take her to pay off her loan once she starts (if no forgiveness)?</p>
<p>Zoosermom, I’m so sorry for your loss! I know this must be a difficult time for you, and I pray that you will find comfort in your family and friends.</p>
<p>Does Zoosergirl have to make the decision immediately? I think it’s very hard to make significant life decisions when dealing with the immediacy of a loss. If you could set the decision aside for a few weeks, maybe you would be able to think about it more clearly.</p>
<p>Is the $500 a month after graduation a student loan payment? That seems high to me for a new grad. My gut feeling is that payments of less than $300 a month for most kids for a student loan would be the most I’d sign up for.</p>
<p>I think the decision comes down to a question of which option provides the least amount of stress. </p>
<p>Option 1 potentially relieves financial stress, but with GPA requirements, could be more difficult. The distance and less-than-ideal fit could make for a more challenging transition at a time when you are already dealing with a loss in the family.</p>
<p>Option 2 sounds like a better choice in all ways – proximity to home, more options regarding majors etc. – but appears to be more difficult financially. However, if your daughter can come up with the $4000 per year without too much of a strain, it seems like a better choice. </p>
<p>The last thing I’d consider would be options for transferring if something doesn’t work out. Perhaps she could try the LAC at first, then if the finances feel too difficult, she could transfer to the state school?</p>
<p>In any case, I hope you can take some time to deal with the loss of your father before you have to make a final decision. Nothing is set in stone – if one option doesn’t work out, zoosergirl can transfer. Both options sound good and I’m sure she’ll be happy wherever she goes.</p>
<p>My first thought when reading your post is school B (the school of her heart). Life is often too short and if you can do what you love in a place where you are happy, then I say go for it.
Good Luck with your decision.</p>
<p>Zoosermom- I’m so sorry for the loss of your dad. We lost mine 7 months ago and it’s still hard for me to think straight sometimes. The pain did bring some clarity to things, though. One of the realizations brought forth the same conclusion that cmbmom just posted. If it’s workable, even with a little pain and sacrifice, then have her follow her heart and her dreams. Life is way too short to cut corners on those type of things.</p>
<p>Zoosermom,
My condolences on your loss. I know what it’s like to have the unexpected death of a parent, and how difficutl it is to make decisions and to simply coherently function even months afterward.</p>
<p>My advice is to have your D contact the schools, explain your family’s situation, and ask if she can delay her decision for several more weeks past the usual deadline. In the meantime, counseling could help your family make the optimal decision while also coping with your loss.</p>
<p>Following my gut, I’ recommend for B. Fit is important, flexibility is important.</p>
<p>Our family motto is ‘Don’t close doors you cannot reopen’. So to that end, I would look at transfer acceptance rates at each school, in case the first on selected does not work out.</p>
<p>Zoosermom, my condolences. I understand exactly what you mean when you say you can’t think this through with your usual clarity.</p>
<p>An observation, however: Of course you want to guide your daughter, but it sounds like you’ve laid out all the facts pretty clearly and concisely. It also sounds like the financial part of the decision comes down to things that she, not you, will have to live with – contributing the $4000 a year and paying back loans later.</p>
<p>Why not let this be her choice entirely? Seems to me that you’ll be comfortable with either selection.</p>
<p>I agree that this is something she can figure out for herself. I would not discount the importance of your church in town if she is deeply religious. This can add significant educational value to the experience. (For my d., it has been a major plus.)</p>
<p>$2,000 in debt is tiny these days - and, who knows, if her income goes up just a little, she won’t have it. This is NOT the last chance in life she’ll have to stretch her wings, but it is a good one, and the downside seems so very small.</p>
<p>Hi everyone, thank you for your kind words, they are much appreciated.</p>
<p>I’m reading the responses and digesting all of them. I do want to say that this should be ZG’s decision entirely, but I am getting the impression from her that she’s going to make it all about the money and may be sorry that she did. She’s pouting a little bit because hubby and I can’t wave a magic wand and give her everything she wants. Don’t get me wrong, she’s the greatest kid, but has never had to make a momentous decision like this, and there are such good reasons for each school. It really does seem a case of six of one and half a dozen of the other to me, but what do I know? I would like her to come out of school debt free, but on the other hand, I don’t see anything wrong with working for what you want.</p>
<p>Sorry, I misread. $500 in debt per month is $6k a year - for how long? (one year? 10 years?) It’s not outrageous, but for a future teacher, it does give a little bit of pause.</p>
<p>zooser…the problem is that 18 year old young adults have no basis for understanding how much money $500 a month after taxes really is. That is the problem. They cannot possibly be expected to make a good financial decision at this point in the game.</p>
<p>I think it’s easy to get distracted about the cost of things, but it’s often the least important issue. In 20 years, will it matter that she had some college debt? </p>
<p>Money only has value in what freedom it gives you to make certain choices. For our kids, we put it in terms of something they could understand as HS kids – cars. By attending the more expensive school, they can’t have ANY car, and will probably have an older/used car once they graduate. Loans up to about $20,000 seem like a reasonable choice for a wonderful educational experience.</p>
<p>One thing I did back in the dark ages was to call the Direct Loan folks and explain the total amount I would be borrowing and have them explain what (roughly if things didn’t change) it would cost per month to payback, using all the different payment plans.</p>
<p>“Sorry, I misread. $500 in debt per month is $6k a year - for how long? (one year? 10 years?) It’s not outrageous, but for a future teacher, it does give a little bit of pause.”</p>
<p>Theoretically 10 years, but if she does teach science, almost all of it will be wiped away in 5.</p>
<p>“If she doesn’t teach science, she’ll likely have a better-paying job, so it will likely be a wash.”</p>
<p>That’s a good point. I’m just not in a position to really comprehend what is reasonable and what isn’t, and as was posted above, she’s less so than I. A couple of probably meaningless observations: she is worried about the course selection in the state school, it’s set out very clearly, because it’s very chemistry heavy (to the point of being almost a second major), whereas the private school allows more options. The other thing is that she has a job now making pretty good money and has always planned to work throughout her college years. The state school plan involved working and shopping for clothes. This is sort of a thing for her since she’s had 13 years of uniforms and doesn’t have an extensive wardrobe.</p>
<p>Zoosermom, I am so sorry to hear about your father.</p>
<p>As far as your DD, I am not one to pick a school that requires taking on a lot of debt. I do have a problem with choice #1, b/c I am willing to guess that many kids do not get the 3.3 necessary to keep the scholarship. If she loses it, will she be in the hole for a lot of $$, or is this an affordable public school? If #1 is affordable without the merit award then I would pick it. If it is also going to cause a lot of financial debt should the scholarship be lost (I would assume the worst case), then I would go with choice #2.</p>