I was early in my career and in a new job. A perk was that they sent me to a conference with my H and gave me a stipend for a dinner that would be given upon return with receipt .
We went to a very nice, dimly lit, very expensive restaurant and I felt really proud to be there on their dollar… He ordered fish. They were slow on the order. He got a meal, cut into it and said- I think this is steak tartare. As we never ate raw meat this was disgusting to us. We politely told the waiter that this was not the fish he ordered. The waiter insisted it was fish. After demonstrating the food, he was very surprised and took it away. Again we waited and this time it was the fish, wines and deserts we never ordered and were not charged for the meals.
Darn, I almost insisted that the job was going to pay for the meal. This was the only time in my whole career I got offered a meal paid for by the company.
Most steak places I’ve been to ask you to cut into your steak. We have a place we like to go and they’re really good about replacing-quickly-steak that’s over or underdone. My D is an assistant manager at a family restaurant and they do that too. They’re also really good about fixing mistakes and yes, there are timetables they’re supposed to follow in asking how the food is, in getting replacements back, and so on. Because of her work, I know how hard these folks work-I don’t see a decline in service as someone above mentioned-I try to be understanding, not demanding, and tip well.
Speaking of raw things, the only food item I can remember sending back to the kitchen in the past year was a dish I ordered at a pop-up location of a restaurant which was described as being topped with a farm fresh organic egg. What the description neglected to mention was that it was a totally raw, uncooked egg - yolk and white. Now, I like runny yolks in a poached or fried egg but I wasn’t keen on eating a raw egg, especially raw egg white. I found it strange that they mentioned that was the way it was intended to be, I thought it had been a mistake. I suggested to the manager on the way out that they needed to update the description to reflect that the egg was raw. Between people with immune system issues and folks not wanting to eat raw eggs, I’m surprised they even thought to go that route. I found it odd.
I have this problem all the time. I’m an “on the side, substitute this for that, no this, add that, blah, blah”. But I do evaluate the person who is taking the order. If they don’t seem too sharp, I don’t ask for much. I go to Memphis a lot, and will usually only put in the important requests there, because they seem to be unable to handle too many requests, it seems.
But I can live with most mistakes and don’t even mention it, except for my request for no mayonnaise. That grosses me out. So I repeat it twice, and sometimes say that I’m allergic to mayonnaise (I’m not). They still screw it up often, but at least if I say I’m allergic, they won’t just put another bun on the mayonnaise soaked hamburger.
I suggest that when your son says “no cheese”, that he adds that he’s allergic, and says “no cheese” twice. Unless he’s uncomfortable with being dishonest about that, but it seems to really help them remember.
Reporting a food allergy to a restaurant kitchen sets in motion a variety of complex procedures, as some are life threatening. Neil Swidey of the Boston Globe wrote an article about this (“Why food allergy fakers need to stop” - October 14, 2015) and it was a thought provoking read. The upshot of his reporting was to be direct in your request to the kitchen, but do not state there is an allergy when there isn’t. It bogs restaurants down with protocols and when there are multiple unnecessary steps added due to fabricated health issues, it may impact how well dangerous problems are addressed, while decreasing the kitchen’s overall efficiency. Of course, increasing numbers are now making such statements.
Restaurants in the article were emphatic about striving to honor all types of patron requests, whether allergy driven or not.
^quite frankly, as someone who has a spouse with celiac – documented with numerous biopsies and lab tests – I found the tenor of the article insulting.
Yes, plenty of folks get on the fad bandwagon. So what? That’s the cost of doing business, if you want to cater to those with diseases and allergies. Or not: “sorry, the only gluten free item we have is a green salad. All other items are subject to cross contamination.”
We just came back from a week in Boston and we only frequented restaurants that had an online menu with gluten free items. No all restaraunts do, and that’s ok with us.
I had no idea that restaurants go through any special procedures when you say you have a food allergy. Based upon the number of times my food comes back to me with mayonnaise on it regardless, I’d say that maybe I’m frequenting some low class restaurants that don’t take any particular precautions
So I’ll stop saying I’m allergic, but you know, if I don’t—so often all they will do is just replace the bun or piece of bread that has the mayonnaise on it. And give me the same mayonnaise smothered burger or sandwich. I’ll try saying it three times, instead of just twice.
Most of us agree that the OP did everything right and tha the manager did the right thing by comping the meal. Where I disagree with some here is that I believe the waitress should have given the son the option of having the whole plate removed or leaving the unoffending portion.
If it were me, I would have opted for them to leave the part I wanted so that I could eat with the rest of my group. Others might do it differently, but I feel the customer should be given the choice.
I think waiters and waitresses don’t think about it, often they just take the plate. But since this can be a recurring problem for some, I suggest that when they move to grab the plate, ask if you can keep the rest of the food. I guarantee you they will always say yes. Just ask.
I am an “allergy faker” regarding mushrooms. The one time I tried to eat them in a restaurant I literally choked on it and almost had to be Heimliched. I have tried saying NO mushrooms, please, but most times, I would get mushrooms anyway. Since I have begun to say I am allergic, I generally get my food the way I want it. I am paying for the food and I am being polite about it. As I noted before, I don’t order anything that has a mushroom melange in it because I realize that would be too difficult to alter. I don’t think it’s too much to ask a cook to refrain from sticking their hand in the tray of mushrooms when preparing my veggie omelet.
As for steak, I prefer mine well done so I generally order medium well because the meat continues to cook after it’s taken off the heat. If it’s too rare, I just give it to H or take it home and cook it a bit more.
@techmom99, I’d say choking and almost needing to be Heimliched is pretty dang close to an allergy, in fact perhaps worse than a mild allergic reaction. I think you are not a faker!
@thumper1 Huh? I’m sure some Friendlies are filthy but ours is as nice as any other ice cream place. It gets remodeled about every 5 years so I’ve never seen it too outdated or worn out. It’s one of the few places that can seat multiple families together and we used to go there with a couple of families that our kids were “friendly” with (har har) in elementary school. I’ve never gotten a wrong order, just that one I mentioned on a busy night where the waitress forgot our order but not the bill. My favorite sundae is the Friendlies Reese’s Peanut Butter Cup Sundae, the 5 scoop one that also has the marshmallow sauce. I haven’t had one for about 4 years though–can’t survive the calories and cholesterol any more. But I will return for it again one day!
While I count Friendly’s as a restaurant, I am also a big believer in not ordering something in a restaurant that is not its strength. However much Friendly’s might want to reposition itself, it’s an ice cream joint, IMO. That said, when I was in HS, I had their coffee Fribble’s all the time. While I was initially sad that there was no Friendly’s near my college campus, the pain was take away by having a Shake Shack open the year before I matriculated.
I think very often the wait staffs are overwhelmed. I try to recognize this situation, and make it as easy as possible for them, be undemanding and clear in my order. Not an excuse for bad service, but trying to get effective service, working the odds and still getting what I want.
After 33 years in aviation, I have never had an aviation related nightmare. I still, however, occasionally have waitressing nightmares, after all these years. I’m working the breakfast shift in a seafood restaurant, the only people in the entire place are me and the cook. I am waitress, hostess, busperson and cashier. Two full tour busses decide to descend upon us for breakfast, people start seating themselves, it is impossible, stress, and bedlam. Yes, it happened. So I do have a little sympathy when I can tell people are busy. What aggravates me is when I’m the only table, I’m being neglected, and I can see them on their iPhone. That’s when I walk up to the kitchen and ask for my check. Too bad restaurants don’t have a “no cell phone on shift” policy.
Friendly’s repositioning itself? The google description (and menu) is basically the same as it was 40 years ago as my high school hangout joint: “Informal chain serving signature ice cream treats alongside American classics like burgers & melts.”
At a cheaper restaurant(less than $15/person), I don’t expect the minimum wage staff to get it perfect. Unless it’s a health hazard(ex. meat is raw), I’ll usually ignore it or very politely ask would you mind …, not demand to see the manager. I’ve seen and heard of way too many health code violations to become enemies of the staff, if I ever intend to eat there again. If I had severe food allergies, I wouldn’t trust most places, even some of the nicer ones, not to have cross-contamination. At a nicer restaurant(at least $30/person + alcohol + tip), I think it’s reasonable to ask for food to be made to order.
@doschicos Well, whatever they wanted to call their revamps as they emerged from chapter 11 a few years ago.
To circle back to the topic, mocha Fribble is not on the menu IIRC, so asking the workers to mix chocolate and coffee would end up in my order getting messed up.
The Reese’s Friend-Z is my “to go” choice! You can eat some with that special spoon, put the rest in the freezer, and sugar coma out the next day!
Our family appreciates Friendlies b/c not all of us can do dairy, so we can go for ice cream without some being empty-handed. DH gets his guilty pleasure of fries, and my friend always gets a BLT, which is surprisingly good there. It’s hard to mess up something so basic.
If I’m questioning my substandard restaurant, I get the baked potato. I’ve never had one from anywhere that was actually bad.
@mom2collegekids I agree with you. The server should have asked if he wanted to keep the ok portion. As the "difficult " one on my family (light cheese, dressing on the side, no onions, etc) I feel your pain. It sucks when you go out to eat, and one person is just sitting there awaiting a remake. If I know it’s a place likely to screw up my order (or is really busy) I make a point of telling wait person that I’m grateful he/she will take extra care to make sure my order is correct. Sometimes this keeps my request from getting lost between the table and the kitchen.
