<p>First of all - quick report, since I posted early in the thread that my 17yo daughter had already gone off with friends for their trip. This was a trip in the “small group of unchaperoned kids, cabin in the mountains” variety - not bacchanal on the beach. 3 girls, 1 guy. Anyway, daughter arrived safely home yesterday at a reasonable hour.</p>
<p>I agree with momsdream’s comment that the kids who want these things are probably the same ones who have been pushing limits, bit by bit, all along. My d’s first unchaperoned trip with friends was over spring break - with 2 friends, going to Disneyland. My d. also traveled overseas with a loosely chaperoned school group for 3 weeks last summer - I say “loosely” because the nature of the trip also meant the kids would have a good deal of unchaperoned free time without direct supervision. We planned accordingly. </p>
<p>I am also wondering whether there is an urban/suburban/rural thing going on. I live in a burb and my son went to high school locally, but my d. attends school in the city. So she has had a daily commute since age 14, having to rely on public transportation to get home when she was younger, and to traverse some very seedy neighborhoods along the way. She definitely has picked up a lot more in the way of street smarts than her brother did at the same age - for him, it was a very big deal when I sent him off by himself for admitted student visits when he was 18. Or at least it was for me – the other barrier is one of birth order. Kid #1 gets more hovering parental protection, needs to push harder for freedoms - but if kid #1 avoids serious trouble, the freedoms come easier for kid #2. (But of course if kid #1 messes up, kid #2 pays with greater restrictions, to avoid repeating the same mistakes). </p>
<p>The situation in Aruba is scary – but I can’t pick up the paper locally without reading of some young woman being the victim of an assault, robbery, rape or homicide. It’s scary when as a parent of a 15 year old who used public transportation every day I read about some other 15 year old being the victim of a shooting on the bus – but that happened at least twice the year my d. was 15. So while I also would be uncomfortable with the bacchanal-type senior trip, I do think that my tolerance of risk has been stretched somewhat through the demands of urban living.</p>