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<p>Gnu, I’m sure the moderators appreciate your help in trying to police this forum and be sensitive to the OP’s needs. Disagree with you absolutely on whether we should avoid exploring the broader issue. The OP’s fundamental question is when to “let go”. The beach party issue is just a trial run for her.</p>
<p>Back to the topic - would it make a difference to readers if this was a post-graduation (say, end of July) party, rather than a pre-graduation party? My experience is that the pre-grad parties take on a life all their own - with a sense of desperation to party, party, party - that seems to accentuate the risky behavior.</p>