<p>2forcollege: I really do suggest therapy for your D. It probably doesn’t matter all that much which college she goes to. But a passive-aggressive father who manipulates to get what he wants does do its damage.</p>
<p>This thread is just full of destructive behavior of H’s. Here’s what mine did: cried at Skidmore because his parents never did this for him. (They sent him to Albany. Too too sad, right? And I went to state u, too, no glamor there or big ten school. No crying here, sheer joy.) So, he made really poor business decisions and got himself 300K in debt just before it was time to sent D to college. More crying, but he figured only option live at home, go to state u. (We’re ten minutes away.) </p>
<p>However, supermommy to the rescue. My college money was the house – worth a lot and PAID OFF in twelve tough years to have money for college. I refinanced the house to pay off business debt, applied for FA and work two to three jobs. H foiled!!! Therapy needed, but kids won’t go. H stays at studio sometimes or house depending on how manipulative he’s being. Oh, and I own the house now.</p>
<p>owlice: Sorry about that front lobe. Nah, it never kicks in, but they get wives, secretaries, nurses, you know, us little folk, to take care of them. S still has me. </p>
<p>owlice: So glad about the little girl. </p>
<p>owlice: any of those cookies without raisins? I’m not a raisin kind of a girl.</p>
<p>mountains: I think you need a leave of absence. And what can you expect if you party with others til twelve. We were here waiting for you. (See winky face, LOL. – Party away. You deserve it!)</p>
<p>H tries to pull one every now and then but I can usually talk him into anything. Not too hard to manage at all; just needs to be heard and 99% of the time a sweetheart. </p>
<p>mythmom - That’s a tough one. You’re one heck of a strong woman; what you’ve done took a lot of guts. Bravo to you. And no leave of absence here - can’t afford it. My girlfriends and I have a very strong commitment to go out at least once a month, and we do! </p>
<p>owlice - Don’t do raisins either but I’ll take a dozen of the oatmeal cookies. Love that fiber. :)</p>
<p>Owlice - so glad the little girl made it through the night. My thoughts and prayers were with her as well. I get so sad reading about children with serious medical problems.</p>
<p>On another note, my S is exactly the same as yours - he is constantly forgetting assignments, even when he does them. It’s so frustrating - no matter how many times I tell him that when he’s finished with an assignment, he should put it in his folder and put the folder in his backpack, he somehow forgets. </p>
<p>mythmom - agree with mountains, you are a very strong woman. It’s so hard when you have to handle all the big things yourself. Very admirable. I just don’t know why some men have to be so difficult. My H also has his issues - but I can usually work him around to my way of thinking - it’s just that it takes so much unnecessary effort that it makes me crazy. I think the problem often is that moms naturally put their kids and their needs first, and men don’t necessarily do the same.</p>
<p>Owlice, I LOVE oatmeal cc cookies. Have you ever used the Mrs. Field’s cookies recipe? I make them once a year at the holidays because they are so decadent, but console myself that the oatmeal makes them still healthy. How’s that for living in denial?</p>
<p>To all whose H’s are a trial-- I am sure this process can bring out the worst in a difficult personality.
Luckily, my H is an angel because he has put up with a lot of neurosis from me during this college process and hasn’t threatened to walk out over any of it.</p>
<p>I can just see my H posting and saying that his W (moi) has major issues. I just have to keep telling myself that since I’m not perfect, I didn’t marry a perfect man (but hope springs eternal). </p>
<p>Oatmeal cookies, all gone. Thank you, owlice. I don’t know anything about a second H, so no comment on that one.</p>
<p>lindz, I saw that thread and emailed it to my H last night. Agreed this is probably the root of the issue. Even though he agreed with every bit of reasoning I wrote to him, he still plans to have a “discussion” with her Friday night. Ok, all of you, hope my D is resolute about sticking with her choice and not backing down to Daddy. (And mythmom, yes we have done therapy- mostly for coping with the traumatic stress from the illness, but I suspect parent issues were part of the discussions…part of why her heart is set on being a psych major!)</p>
<p>Most of the time H is fine, he just surprises me with bouts of his Middleastern machoness, the rest of the time we refer to him as a delicate flower. But when he gets stubborn over something…forget it! There’s absolutely no stopping him, but I’ll do everything I can. Hmmm, there’s some papers for the business he needs me to sign…hmmm…</p>
<p>Owlice, thank goodness I’ve been avoiding all those virtual goodies (and non-virtual) this week…down 3 1/2 lbs at WW today!!! Maybe I should stay on Matzah year round!
Glad the little one is doing better, she’ll stay in my prayers.</p>
<p>Chocolate chips in oatmeal cookies? It’s wrong, people; it’s just wrong.</p>
<p>My sympathies to all going through this process without cookies. I suppose mac and cheese, and chocolate aren’t okay during Passover either. Those are the “go to” comfort foods for me.</p>
<p>I wish we got “do overs” on this school selection process. My learning curve for Kid 2 continues. For my oldest, it’s all about the classes. The extracurricular stuff is just nice frosting. He had free fly-ins for admitted student days, but at two of the schools the courses he is interested in don’t meet on the days he is there. Had we realized this earlier, he could have contacted the schools to see if he could have come on different days. He got to attend several classes at this last visit and enjoyed them, so I think that school will be his choice. It’s a fine choice, but it would have been nice to have that experience at all three schools. He flew in last night, and flew out for the third school this morning. As exhausted as he is feeling, I’m not sure school 3 stands a chance! </p>
<p>2forcollege, good luck with dealing with your husband. It’s all from love and wanting what is best, but different interpretations of “best” make it hard. I hope your daughter is able to stick to her guns. My sympathies also to those dealing with ex’s who want their input taken into account, but not their money. </p>
<p>Congratulations to all who know what decal goes in their car window!</p>
<p>To the poster who asked about whether you really could accept at multiple schools. I just looked at one of my son’s schools and on the on-line thingy it specifically says that you are withdrawing all other applications. Which is what I would expect - I would expect that it is a fairly binding contract. </p>
<p>CountingDown - sending hugs your way. A week from now we will be meeting here after our trips to the post office to get our stuff postmarked…I personally will be bringing bottles of champagne and non-alcoholic champagne so that we can all celebrate together! Hoping somebody else brings the chocolate!</p>
<p>Let’s just say that the GC is not my favorite person right now. I’m willing to discuss, but by PM. Anything more and I blow my cover as a suburban mom! ;)</p>