<p>I’m in the honesty camp. This young man needs some help finding his way and he’s coming to you for direction. Sit down, talk with him, see what he really wants and then give him clear and honest advice.</p>
<p>WHAT?? Hire an expensive professional counselor instead of a CC poster with more than two years of experience, nearly 1000 posts, and six green thingies? :)</p>
<p>I tried offering alternate suggestions last year, but the kid is just so hung up on status. He wouldn’t have applied to ANY of the schools my son did, even though many of them are very good. And I think in some ways now he might just be wanting to save face since his results were so poor the first time.</p>
<p>Sally it sounds as if this kid has drunk the status school Kool Aid. Perhaps you can also point him in the direction of a few college blogs that may bring him around to reality.</p>
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<p>When I’ve seen admissions rates for transfer students at the most selective schools they have been lower than for freshman.</p>
<p>Googling “Harvard admissions rate transfer students” I get
[Fifteen</a> Transfer Students Admitted](<a href=“http://www.thecrimson.com/article/2011/8/31/students-transfer-harvard-admissions/]Fifteen”>Fifteen Transfer Students Admitted | News | The Harvard Crimson)</p>
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<p>Doing the same search for Yale, the first link says “The two to three percent transfer admissions rate reflects space limitations”.</p>
<p>I don’t think I would offer any opinion unless I knew I could help out. As an example, I am not very knowledgeable when it comes to FA, so if a kid needs a lot of FA I wouldn’t be the right source. My kids focused on top 20 schools. I probably could help out if that’s what a kid is interested in. Not so much if a kid is looking for test optional schools, good transfer schools, good merit aid schools, athletic recruiting…If I could help, I would give my honest opinion.</p>
<p>If the family could afford it, I think a professional college counselor probably could be of great help.</p>
<p>Thanks, everyone, for the great information and advice. You are all giving me a lot of good ideas.</p>
<p>Like others, I am in the honesty camp. I would be honest about being confused what HE is looking for, as opposed to what others might expect from him. I’d be honest about his essays not ringing true because his voice isn’t in them. I would suggest he find a few schools he is really excited about, and apply to those. </p>
<p>I feel sorry for this young man. He has been sold a pile of ephemeral dreams as a substitute for an education into learning to speak with his own voice. If you don’t speak up, he will be left with the vague sense that something is amiss but I doubt he will be able to put his finger on what that is. Sadly, it seems you are the only adult in his life in a position to teach him to see reality and work with it.</p>
<p>Realistically, most of the transfer-friendly schools are state universities.</p>
<p>Of the high prestige private universities, Cornell and possibly Columbia and USC may be more transfer-friendly than most (hard to tell with the latter two, because they do not reveal their common data sets, which reveal numbers of transfer applicants and admits).</p>
<p>On the other hand, it does look like he did not find a safety he liked, and still does not have a safety that he likes.</p>
<p>may i ask if you were paid for editing his essays? it is a lot of work, frankly, if a friend is doing this (i mean editing the essay) for my kid, i would ask to compensate for her/his time.</p>
<p>Look up the transfer rates for each of these schools. Some might be nearly impossible. The numbers may be so low that it might suggest that the few accepted have some significant hook, such as being the spouse of a newly hired faculty member (hire me, enroll my spouse).</p>
<p>Frankly, I would try to distance myself from the entire process. First of all, it’s likely taking up too much of your time. Secondly, he’s not likely going to have success unless he includes some low matches. Lastly, if he’s not accepted to schools that his parents want, they’ll somehow eventually blame you.</p>
<p>Sally, he’s asking you to work on numerous essays? Too much. He HAS to be able to manage some of this on his own, in fairness to him. It’s one thing to say, I’ll look at your main pers statement, help you see what you are presenting, whether it will make you stand out (or at least have the skill sets colleges look for.) Another to dig in so deeply, on so many pieces. It’s also a burden to you. And you can’t change what I’ll call fate.</p>
<p>When I’ve helped kids, we start with that main essay only and we talk about the impressions it sends. The structure. How a simple rephrase can work wonders. (The one most hs kids don’t get is phrasing in the positive.) They learn in the process, come up with their own revamps. I tell them, what matters, in the end, is that YOU feel YOU did your best. Not me. [When I opened this thread, I was afraid you were going to say the parents blamed you for his college results.]</p>
<p>I wouldn’t get so deeply re-involved. If you feel some obligation as he’s your son’s friend, I’d say, show me one. </p>
<p>I believe kids should be bright enough to get some savvy adult to look over some of their writing. (Hs writing is such a different formula, process, structure than the “personal statement” is meant to be.) And, sometimes our take on what supp questions are after is more sophisticated and we can clue them in. But, asking you to go over so many pieces? </p>
<p>And, yes, at this point,I would suggest a few alternate schools- and then point him to the web or coll guides for some real look-sees. I don’t mean to sound harsh, but it feels like he needs to stand on his own a bit more, take on some of the responsibilities for his direction.</p>
<p>I have not read all of the posts but to the OP, if you care about this kid, you might just gently float the, “Have you considered expanding your list?” question. He’ll either be receptive to further discussion or it can end there, but at least you will have tried.</p>
<p>If you don’t mind me asking what were the boy’s stats? I am thinking there is something else besides the essays that is getting in his way. I would spend a few hours editing as a courtesy to a family friend and stay out of it. If he or his family were open to second tier schools they probably would have applied the first time around.</p>
<p>myboby, I’m not getting paid but I am happy to help, within reason. mom2collegekids is right, though–eventually they could start blaming me if this keeps happening. </p>
<p>It’s pretty awkward…every time his mom mentions the new Ivy (or some of the other dream schools) he is now considering I want to say “but he didn’t get into any Ivies the first time around.” The conversation is always “he thinks he would really like it at X” or “Y is more intellectual, just like him.” I am not disputing that these things are true, but after an entire year of disappointing results I think they need to shift their focus from what HE “would like” to what schools would like him. It just seems as though they are still in denial.</p>
<p>A professional counselor will spell it out for him and tell it like it is.
If he and his parents are driven by prestige and status schools, then a professional can set them straight on what schools he should apply to as a transfer student.</p>
<p>HarvestMoon, he had a solid SAT score (2270, I believe) and over a 3.8 UW–almost all honors and AP classes. Teachers love him, because he works hard and is very enthusiastic about school. He is the kid who always goes above and beyond in everything. His ECs are literally a buffet of everything one could do in high school, so some things don’t demonstrate true commitment but others (like his varsity sport) do. He doesn’t have demonstrated musical proficiency but is good at art. He has a lot of leadership skills. Really, he is the classic all-around high achiever–the kind of kid that in our generation would have had no trouble getting into the school of his choice. And our high school sends many kids to Ivies and other top-tier universities every year.</p>
<p>I think, and I have told him (gently) and his mom, that he needs to sound sincere and communicate genuine interest in the places he is applying to. I have suggested to both of them that he would do great in a liberal arts college environment, where he can explore his interests and forge a path from there. But he wants big.</p>
<p>SLUMOM: I am going to suggest a counselor to his mom. They brought one in last year to help him choose between his final fallback choices but that was it. Apparently the counselor suggested he just go to our state flagship, which I think would also make sense (and save a substantial amount of money). I think to him that just seems like a letdown after all the time spent talking about more grandiose ideas.</p>
<p>sally305 – If I were asked to spend so much time helping this student, then I would have to address the issue. Here’s what I might say to his parents (or to him): “I’m happy to do whatever I can to assist. I can help some with editing, but the way I feel most comfortable helping is by talking with him about his college choices. Some of the schools he’s been looking at [give a knowing, sympathetic, ‘I know this must be frustrating’ look] think that they’re the only thing around, but they’re really not. There are some very fine colleges that aren’t on his list but that would probably be quite interested in him, and it would help if we could talk about some of them. Would that be okay?”</p>
<p>Or: “You could hire a private counselor to get more suggestions. My experience [reading it on CC time after time must count as that!] tells me that a counselor would want to focus mostly on forming a list of schools that would be a good fit for your son and where he would have a great chance of getting in. If you want, I could talk with him about some of his school choices.”</p>
<p>If they say no, help him as much as you think you should, then suggest that a professional counselor might be a better resource.</p>
<p>The transfer student numbers are often misconstrued. Most schools have no slots for transfer students unless some of their existing students drop out. So the rate is as much a result of how many apply for how few seats that might even materialize. Other schools have special programs to admit students mid stream in engineering or something else as a dual degree program with another college.</p>
<p>I know of only one school in top 20 professing that they want transfer students, Northwestern. They have a policy that says transfer students can contribute in a big way by bringing ideas from other schools. They seem to accept more than 100.</p>
<p>Here is a list of high transfer acceptances </p>
<p>http://***********.com/stats/transfer-acceptance-rates/#.UQvCth1X1q0</p>
<p>Here is northwestern policy.
[Transfer</a> Applicant FAQs: Office of Undergraduate Admission - Northwestern University](<a href=“http://www.ugadm.northwestern.edu/apply/frequently-asked-questions-and-resources/transfer-applicants-faqs.html#whoisadmitted]Transfer”>http://www.ugadm.northwestern.edu/apply/frequently-asked-questions-and-resources/transfer-applicants-faqs.html#whoisadmitted)</p>
<p>I don’t know if the high rates at Columbia and Penn reflect their programs with liberal arts colleges (3+2) for engineering or other areas.</p>
<p>Sally- you could provide real value here by trimming the EC list, suggesting an essay topic that was not all over the map and an exercise in fiction writing, and suggesting, “Let’s figure out a list of transfer schools for you that are realistic-- with one “you never know” school in the mix just for fun”. And then- give the kid a list of paid counselors if he needs/wants more.</p>
<p>I get that his EC’s were all over the the place but guess what, an application is not court testimony where he has to list every stupid thing he did in HS. You really want to laugh sometimes when parents and kids here post the laundry list, brag of attaching a two page addendum to the application just to fit in all the low-rent type awards and clubs. No college says, “You must tell us everything you do in your spare time”.</p>
<p>So help the kid identify the two or three meaningful, outside the classroom things he’s done which he cares about, and you will have helped him significantly. If he needs hand-holding throughout the process, I agree with the above that for the sake of this friendship you need to get out of the mix.</p>
<p>OP from your description he sounds like a superstar so maybe it’s that dreaded “tufts syndrome” where the schools thought he would attend elsewhere. But that doesn’t explain the ED unless it was an uber competitive ivy. I think you are being a very good friend and admire your willingness to continue assisting this boy. But I would be careful how involved you get; if it doesn’t work out this time around, that pill is going to be very bitter for them to swallow and they may look for a scapegoat.</p>