<p>Eyemamom, that was a problem we had with MIL. She LOVES attention and being helped and will be as helpless as she can be to get someone to help her. I left her at a church event one day, and got a call that she should not be left alone. She has gone to the Ladies’ Room so many times there on her own, but as she was wheeling herself there (she can walk but for things like that a wheelchair is preferable and safer than the walker), someone accompanied her, and she milked that person for every bit of help. which prompted the phone call. to me. </p>
<p>It’s a big problem we have with her that people who offer to help, then decide she needs that help when she does not as a matter of course. Her SIL is one of the worst offenders. She falls over herself offering to help in every possible way, and then complains about all the work it is to have the woman there . Her son called me and said that his mother could not be expected to wait on my MIL the way she does when we visit. We had to practically peel her off of her with all of the “help” she wanted to give, and MIL laps up that attention. </p>
<p>So, also be aware that the story you may be getting from the uncle may not be 100% true. My MIL loves for those to pity her and say she needs more help and attention. </p>
<p>Really, call up your cousins and say you want to visit and see if you can’t have a get together. Keep your mouth shut but watch the interactions.</p>