Should I transfer? Please help

Thanks for the responses.

You’re right, this sounds extremely entitled. The mere fact that you’re considering sitting out of college for an entire year is the definition of being unhappy with the colleges that have admitted you, and of being insulted, not humbled, at their decisions.

Aside from that observation, I won’t advise you whether you should take a gap year or enroll in a non-Princeton university with the plans to transfer as soon as you can. That is a decision that should involve your parents. If they support either of those decisions, that is all that matters. Personally, if my child was in this situation, I would not consider either option a reasonable or mature decision. But again, your parents know your situation better - maybe they will recognize a factor that makes your wish to sit out reasonable.

I apologize if I offended you with my message, but I want to reiterate that I am not unhappy with my acceptances but rather my rejections. I am by no means “insulted” by the fact that I have been accepted at the colleges I mentioned; why on earth would I have applied if I considered their approval an offense? Princeton, to me, has been a goal since I was eight years old. I was the kid who went to every possible information session, read and read and read about it, essentially memorized its brochure, and dreamed of what my time there would be like. So, yes, perhaps, I am being unreasonable- but when have dreams ever been reasonable?

Also, sitting out of college for a year is not an end-all decision… Many people take gap years that are fruitful, and they learn a lot from what they choose to do. I have already been told that it is possible to postpone my admittance to Columbia if I were to do a year-long volunteering project, and if I were to be rejected again at Princeton, I would have somewhere to go. I understand your perspective, but please appreciate mine also and know that I have really thought this out.

I am not offended in the least. You have said nothing offensive.

As for the rest of your response, rather than repeat myself on those points, I’ll simply repeat that I refer you to your parents. Their opinion is the only one that will matter.

What does Princeton have that the other schools were you have been accepted does not?

It’s highly unlikely that a school that has rejected you will admit you after a gap year. General wisdom on CC is to apply to a different batch of schools after a gap year, not the same ones.

Please get excited about one of your current options and forget about transferring. It’s a terrible way to start school and totally unnecessary with the fantastic options you have on the table.


The short answer is no.
You need to think through this decision as an older version of yourself instead of your childhood perspective. You may believe you like the other school more, but when you are comparing such highly sought after institutions, it is somewhat silly to sit out of college for a year just because you didn’t get into the exact school you wanted. You’re in the position to go to any of these three institutions, which is a great privilege considering both the admissions process this cycle and how expensive college costs have risen. If I were you, I would avert my focus from Princeton onto these schools and try to figure out which one could be your new dream. At this point in the game, your application will look exactly the same next year if you took a gap year, so you most likely will receive the same decision if you applied to Princeton again. And if you chose to transfer after experiencing what these institutions have to offer, you would most likely be underwhelmed by how minimal any real difference is in the quality of education/experience. It is not like you are comparing a low tier private to an ivy, you’re comparing an ivy to an ivy. So please, at least ask for some adult opinions, and explore these schools before choosing down a path that may leave you ultimately disappointed and empty handed.


Thank you @momofboiler1, @EconPop, and @ohioansenior2021 for your messages. I know you are all right, and that I am being childish… It’s hard to let go of my previous hopes, especially when I had built them up so much in my head. At the bottom of my heart, I knew that there wasn’t any hope in Princeton after decisions, and this was what I needed to hear. I am incredibly pleased with where I can go (although I’m having trouble deciding between my choices). Who knows, I may end up happier than I would have been otherwise! Plus, there is always grad school to think about- the dream need not die just yet.

1 Like

What’s your intended major? Are the costs comparable?


Sorry for my rambling…

You have no bad choices here but for your major, I think you are right that Columbia and Penn have a leg up on Brown. My vote would be Penn but again, you have no wrong choice here. Congrats on wonderful acceptances!!


OP wrote that he/she was rejected from his dream schools–yes, schools with an “s” = plural as in Harvard, Yale, Princeton, & Stanford–yet then proceeds to share that Princeton University is her dream school.

Because OP initially admits that SOME of her dream schools are Harvard, Yale, Princeton, & Stanford, then switches to a discussion of just Princeton as her dream school, and OP then expresses the desire to transfer out of Brown, Penn, or Columbia,
to attend her dream school, it appears that OP has no basis for her dream school other than US News rankings.


OP edited original post, so all responses no longer make sense. Closing thread.

As you edited the original post, all responses make no sense. Closing.