<p>That might be because tuition & expenses for Embry-Riddle is on the extreme expensive side and is extremely specialized for aviation-related careers which leaves little flexibility if/when the aviation sector does poorly as it has been since the end of the Cold War and with civil aviation jobs in doubt. </p>
<p>Worked with a few Embry-Riddle grads who had to change careers away from civil aviation due to 9/11 and the loss of many airline jobs. They were all working as paralegals with one ending up going off to law school several years before the 2008 recession. </p>
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<p>Not true. I personally know two people…a cousin in his 50’s and an older high school classmate in her 40s who are currently earning their flying licenses. Both are enjoying the time of their lives.</p>
<p>I also know one guy who went to E-R, got his degree & then ended up going to law school so he could get a job. Know another young man who got a degree in aviation engineering with hopes of being a pilot but no job, so he went back to get a bachelor’s in EE & just got a job with Boeing. </p>
<p>We are hoping D will be able to find some way to make a living with cinema or some form of art, since she does love it. S so far seems OK with his job in project management, even tho he wants to practice EE. Will see what he is able to do so he can practice EE. He’s studying for the exam & will be looking into requirements for grad school or other professional training his employer will subsidize.</p>
<p>It isn’t just sports or music, of course. There are parents who push academics to the extreme – enroll their kids in weekend math and science classes to try to get them to the Olympiad, RSI, etc. It’s always mysterious to me how much is it about the kid wanting it or the parent driving it.</p>
<p>My own kids just wouldn’t put up with us trying to push them in any particular field, not that we didn’t try. I had visions of my son being a great basketball player and my DD has the perfect build and musical phrasing for dance. Oh, how I longed to go down the “Dance Mother” path. It called to me! But my DD was so viciously mean about the whole thing that I gave up.</p>
<p>Both my kids somehow got into very good schools and have done pretty well despite their absolute unwillingness to get really “passionate” about anything except sleep and enjoying life for the most part. I know those passion kids are out there though. :)</p>
<p>A friend of my son’s dreams of being on the first manned flight to Mars. So far, he’s gone to college and now works for NASA, so he’s making it happen, but his mom is not thrilled with the idea. Who wants their son on another planet? However, his parents are nothing but supportive.</p>
<p>I am deeply grateful that my children HAVE passions, and I do everything I can to support that. I have lived a fairly level life, but the closest I come to passion is my love of dogs and dog training–and if I had to, I’d live without that. I’m not sure how my kids (and husband) would manage without their obsessions.</p>
<p>I hear ya. We know a family whose son was “identified” as having the potential to be a good luger (whatever you call folks whose sport is luge.) He pretty much grew up in Lake Placid. He’s in his early 20s and is progressing well, but guys tend to compete luge for quite a few years, He’s on the National team, and may finally get “his turn” to be on an Olympic team in a couple of years.</p>
<p>Just read the article about the Chinese training facilities. Yes, it’s difficult to see pictures of tiny children in tears and I hope that they aren’t being abused. I guess I take the pictures with a little grain of salt because now I live in the world of competitive cheer. Let me tell you, there are lots of tears in cheer!</p>
My son is often there, too. Against my wishes. I would be happy if he was in hands’ reach at all times.</p>
<p>He is going to Japan to play jazz clarinet next year. I’m already freaking out. He is a tiny, delicate baby. (Who towers over me and is always slightly sloppy.) I will wave and smile when he leaves but definitely wail and tear at my hair as soon as the plane is off the ground.</p>
<p>It is important not to allow a kid to be deluded and to waste energy and time in pursuing, or to put much self worth into fulfilling, impossible dreams, but it is also important not to discourage a kid from a healthy and enjoyable activity. My S was a decent chess player, easily the best in his HS when he was just a freshman, and he liked to spend a fair amount of free time reading about and practicing chess, though he certainly never entertained any ideas about devoting his life to it. So when he got the opportunity to play a kid his age who had won some national tournaments in his age group, he jumped at the chance. Well, he got crushed, which wasn’t that surprising, but I was a bit surprised and upset that he lost almost all interest in chess afterwards. Maybe now that his wounds have been healing for a year, he will get back to it and rediscover its joys, though I don’t know that he will ever feel the same way about it.</p>
<p>That is interesting. So it sounds like “being the best” was part of the attraction for him. The good thing is that chess is something he can pick back up at any point in his life. </p>
<p>That’s another thing that distinguishes some activities from others. A softball player or a swimmer can play ball or swim for long after they want to be supercompetitive at it. When D had her last gymnastics meet, I became very sad thinking “she will never be on bars or beam or vault again in her life.” (And of course, she was very happy thinking “I will never be on bars or beam or vault again in my life.”)</p>
<p>For me, the question would be, what value does this activity have in and of itself? Is this a good way to spend a childhood, whether it turns into an Olympic career or not?</p>
<p>If you’re going to look back on a wasted childhood if you don’t make it to the Olympics, then I wouldn’t do it. But if it’s an interesting, enriching challenge, then why not? Gabby Douglas had a lovely family in Iowa and became close to them. I don’t jump to the conclusion that it would all have been a waste if she’d fallen during nationals and didn’t make the squad.</p>
<p>Gymnastics would have been about the last sport I would have chosen for a kid of mine. But D chose it because she perceived it as being the most difficult one. So there has to be some value in it! Really, there is value in a kid practicing something (just about anything) over and over and over again until she gets it.</p>
<p>Another poster brought up chess and the movie “Searching for Bobby Fischer” came to mind. A good film on just this subject. How do you handle the upbringing of a kid who has a special talent or passion? How do you know if they are gifted and if they are, do you push them through the door or hold it open, or just let them find the door themselves? This is an exceptionally tough question, especially when (like myself) you are completely clueless as to how to deal with a kid’s specific gift. I knew NOTHING about voice or music when I got the call from D’s elementary school music teacher. NOTHING WHATSOEVER. To paraphrase Blanche Dubois “we have always depended on the kindness of strangers”. I made it my point to quickly learn how to separate the genuinely good people from those who were merely out to exploit her. And I made it clear to her at an early age, that this was HER thing. That if she decided not to practice her instrument(guitar, piano, voice) then it was time to quit and that was perfectly OK. And I meant it. I never once had to remind her to practice, but there were many many times I had to drag her away from her then current instrument of choice and insist she do her homework.</p>
<p>[Searching</a> for bobby fischer full movie - YouTube](<a href=“- YouTube”>- YouTube)</p>
<p>I was actually curious about how dangerous diving is, so I looked it up. It’s actually a very safe sport and a lot of gymnasts switch to it because its a lot easier on the body. The articles that I read basically said most accidents happen outside of the pool (things like slipping on the wet steps) and landing incorrectly in the water from even 10 m up isn’t life-threatening.</p>
<p>I think that if a child wants to “chase their dreams”, parents have every right to stop them and say “Hey. You need to graduate and finish school first.” But if an 18+ year old wants to, I really don’t think parents have any business stopping them. It’s their life.</p>
<p>People fail all of the time. It’s how you end up succeeding. JK Rowling was homeless for a while, now she’s one of the richest people in the world. The Chicken Soup for the Soul people got rejected by something like 300 different publishers, but that series is now worth a fortune. One of the girls on the Office wrote about how she kicked around Hollywood for years and years before finally catching a break and even commented that Steve Carrell did too.</p>
<p>That’s assuming said 18+ year old is financing the chase themselves. I get the idea that with some young adults, the parents are still supporting their child, paying for travel, the private coach or acting/music lessons, etc.</p>
<p>Kids who come from wealthy families and want to be random “useless” majors in college don’t really have a choice as to whether or not their parents foot the bill. Financial aid today is majority need-based and if you’re under 24 it’s almost possible to be considered “independent”. So, in that situation, I don’t think a parent should say “I’m not paying for your college because you’re studying something I don’t like,” because the parent has all of the control and the student has very little options.</p>
<p>I’m a French and Theatre major and I’d like to be an actress. I know that’s unrealistic, but it’s what I want to do, so I’m going after it. My parents are helping with some of my college tuition, but I also have a job during the school year to help pay for tuition and am taking out loans. I’m also keeping my grades up so that I can keep my scholarships. And I chose a state school even though it wasn’t exactly where I wanted to go because of the finances. My parents are perfectly fine supporting my “unrealistic dream” as long as I put in the work as well.</p>
<p>Heck, my parents told me that I didn’t <em>have</em> to go to college. (The rule was once I graduated HS it was either get a job or go to college.) I chose to go to college, but my parents never pushed me into that and I’m very grateful for them allowing me to make my own decisions.</p>
<p>I have some friends whose parents pushed them into schools they didn’t want or majors they didn’t like, and they’re already miserable as rising sophomores.</p>
<p>The “lovely” family was the second family Gabby lived with. The first family she lived with “didn’t work out,” according to news reports. I don’t know the reasons and they aren’t my business. But I can’t imagine being her mom and finding out that the 14 year old D I’d sent across the country by herself had nowhere to live. I would also be very, very nervous about having my child live with a family I’d never met. </p>
<p>And apparently there was a rough patch last December when Gabby had to be disciplined. SHe’s a teenager after all! </p>
<p>I think the drive came from Gabby herself. I’m glad her dream came true. She seems like a good kid. </p>
<p>But do I think Gabby herself might have thought that giving up two years of life with her mom, siblings and friends, two years of high school to be homeschooled, etc. really wasn’t worth it if she didn’t make the Olympic team? Yes, I think she’d have been absolutely devastated. </p>
<p>And for all we know, somewhere in the US there is a young gymnast who made the same sorts of sacrifices and didn’t make it and is now incredibly bitter.</p>
<p>What about the girls who were alternates on the Olympic team? How about being the 6th best (actually I think she came in 4th)? Was it worth it then. In some sports you might have another try, but it doesn’t seem to be the case in USA Gymnastics.</p>
<p>At least in swimming they will swim for more than one Olympic cycle. Even lower level triathletes (ones who are good but not Olympic caliber) can find enough sponsorship to make a living. I wonder how many sports are like that.</p>
<p>It’s not like being an alternate on the Olympic team means someone is failure. Yes–it feels a whole lot better to be on the team than to be an alternate, but if a kid doesn’t recognize that the journey can be just as important as the final outcome, then the years of training probably are wasted. I think kids learn about discipline/hard work and other valuable life lessons in preparing for the higher levels of a sport. </p>
<p>I also think it would be extremely difficult (both physically and mentally) to try to come back for a second Olympics. I can see why it’s difficult for gymnasts to hang-in there for 8 years. Training with such intensity takes its toll, which is why very few gymnasts can do it for really long periods. This Olympics was the first one in which a rhythmic gymnast came back and claimed a second gold medal. Has any woman done this in artistic gymnastics? Nadia C maybe? Don’t know.</p>
<p>This topic comes up periodically on CC’s Musical Theater Forum. </p>
<p>I have a daughter who went into this field. It is hard to explain in some ways to others, but there was no “decision” to major in this or any discussion about it beforehand. My daughter’s passion for this field started as a preschooler and it is truly a part of her being. I cannot separate out her “self” from this field. It is her life’s work. It is who she is. From a young age, everyone knew she would go into this area. </p>
<p>Yes, there is the issue of wondering, how talented is my kid? In our case, our kid grew up in a town of 1700 people! Yes, she stood out locally. But we had other benchmarks along the way that indicated she was competitive on a national scale. We did not count on any scholarships, though she did receive some substantial ones which were a delightful surprise. BFA degree programs for musical theater are extremely competitive for admissions, ranging typically from 2-8% acceptance rates (worse than Ivy League). We knew she was competitive for entrance into a program and had several offers. Once in college, which she started at age 16, she achieved a lot in a competitive program. She stood out in various ways even at her college. </p>
<p>She graduated college at age 20 and we expect our kids to support themselves when not in school and she has since her graduation day and ALL of her work is in the fields of music and theater in several facets. Even her so called “survival jobs” which actors have to have, are also in her field (this coming year’s survival job is as a faculty member at a university in fact), but she also works professionally as an actor/singer in musical theater, a singer/songwriter in concert venues, and a musical theater writer/composer with significant commissions. She has had some recognition and achievements nationally as well since graduating college. </p>
<p>We could not predict these successes but as parents, we support whatever dreams and academic/career pursuits and passions our kids possess, no matter the field. And this includes a kid in the arts (who never put arts before academics and was a really good student as well). So, my answer is that I would let my child chase his/her dreams and in the case of my performer kid, we’d have no choice anyway as it is in her inner core of her being and there would have been no stopping her (not that we’d want to). So, there is the issue of a deep seated drive and passion that one cannot keep someone from pursuing. It is not merely a “hobby.”</p>