She did not say or even imply anything about toning down ambitions or opinions, or telling anyone to lose their joy in leadership. She suggested that it may have to do with intangibles. It’s not necessarily what one says or does, but how they come across in the way when they say or do it. Facial expressions, hand gestures and other body language, tone, confidence or lack thereof can all play a part. They don’t need to downplay their intelligence, but they may need to consider whether they are projecting an off-putting air of superiority and figure out how to downplay play that down. There’s a difference.
The most effective leaders bring out the best in others and make them feel like important and valued. Likewise, in dating and relationships, most people want to feel important and valued. Those who convinces themselves that they’re not getting the reaction they want because everyone must be jealous or intimidated by them probably need to dive a little deeper into the introspective pool.