Hello everyone. A while back, I applied to boarding schools, and I was pretty active on this forum. The first time I applied to a single school, and I was rejected. I didn’t move on, and I decided to apply to transfer–this time to many schools so my chances were higher. I made an aggressive plan to improve my resume by December so I could apply to repeat 9th grade. I couldn’t accomplish that plan, so I pushed things back. I made another plan–this time to repeat 10th grade. I couldn’t do that one too. Eventually, I applied to repeat 11th grade, and every school rejected me.
Why? There are some factors that are personal, but I think the underlying reason was that I was not invested or active at my current school. I was always planning to be accepted to boarding school, so I didn’t bother connecting with or contributing to my current school. Everything I did was short term, so I never accomplished anything of significance. If you are interested in transferring, I would strongly recommend not expecting to get in. Focus on being a strong student at your current school and ignore the boarding schools for a bit.
And for those who don’t have any expectation, ability, or desire to go to these schools anymore, you should know that the rejection doesn’t define you. It was only after I was rejected by every school that I started to flourish. I moved on, and I began to think long term. Almost every one of my big accomplishments has come after I was rejected, and I have had far more success than I think I could have had at a boarding school. Most college decisions aren’t out yet, but what has come out is very encouraging. You will be fine, and after a while, you might just be glad you didn’t get in.
This reminds me of when I was rejected by my “dream school” when applying to graduate programs. I went to my second choice, LOVED IT, and eventually realized that it was always a way better fit for me. Yes, I was eventually very glad that I didn’t get into my top choice.
Where you attend high school does not define you as a person. There a lots of very strong students who attend very good universities after graduating from rather ordinary high schools, and lots of very strong students who attend relatively normal universities (often an in-state public university, or a university near home) and then do very well in life.
The point is to do well wherever you are, treat other people well, be a strong student, and be the best person you can be.
I’ll just toss in that at this point, I have known a lot of people who went to highly-selective educational institutions, and also a lot of people who have had a lot of professional success. There is some overlap, as one would expect, but it is VERY clear that overlap is only partial. Many people I know who went to the very selective educational institutions have done reasonably well, but no more so than you would expect for anyone with their degree(s) from a solid institution. Many people I know who really achieved at an extraordinary level professionally have ordinary, or indeed pretty obscure, educational resumes.
So yes, it truly is always about you, and what you make of your opportunities. And by the way, there is nothing wrong with going to a very selective school and then having a fairly ordinary, but generally successful, professional career. Many of those people have great families, and fulfilling lives in general, and their professional careers gave them what they wanted without subtracting too much from other parts of their lives.
All this just underscores you should always be thinking in terms of actually valuing the years you have. Your life has already started, and these years count as much as any.