<p>It’s 2:30 am. Hubby is away. S2 came home intoxicated and tells me there was a little accident with the truck but it’s ok. Says the window is busted and something else. I go look and The window is broken, the door is dented in, the mirror is ganging off, back door scraped. He says a girl was driving him and his friend because the boys were drunk. She got cut off and drove onto the grass. Then due to the mud she floored it to back off the grass and sideswiped a light pole ( they are metal here). He apparently gave her the advice to floor it. It was very close to home so he had her bring him home and she left. Her friend was following in another car. Nobody hurt.</p>
<p>Son is willing to take responsibility, but I don’t think he understands how much $. He thinks his " friend" (a man he knows) at the tire shop can just order parts. He was hoping to have it fixed in a day or two! Not going to happen. </p>
<p>I don’t know if the story is true and a girl drove. If it is I feel bad to tell the insurance because she did him a favor and drove him. I hate to think that he might have tried to drive if she didn’t. If we don’t name her, then his record takes a hot with insurance. I’m inclined to name her. I hope he was truthful to me. </p>
<p>Maybe I will have clearer facts when he is sober. He is in for a sorry surprise when we get the estimate. We have to move fast because of the broken front door window it isn’t drive able .</p>
<p>It could have been worse, but my stomach is in knots, big nasty knots.</p>
<p>Advice only, please hold the criticism if your college jr would never drink.</p>
<p>I forgot to mention this is the truck that we let our son drive. It is his truck, except when we need it. Hubby loves the truck and often comments how nice he kept it for so many years. It is almost 10 years old. Hubby will be pissed. We got hubby a new car so S2 could drive this rather than buy him a used car, it kept it available for us that way without having an extra vehicle. </p>
<p>Try, try to settle yourself down and get some rest. The light of the morning sunrise has a way of lifting away the dark thoughts we have at 3 am. Your staying awake and trying to answer things you cannot possibly answer will do you no good.</p>
<p>Get some decaf tea and a comforter, maybe a book or TV and hopefully you will doze off.</p>
<p>Sometimes ya just want to wring their necks…</p>
<p>Sorry for this tough waking. Glad your S is SAFE and home and in bed, as are the friends who were with him. I agree that this is best handled after as much sleep as you can get yourself rather than now, when you’re tired and upset and S is drunk. Tomorrow is another day and things may look much better in the light of day. Some nice herbal tea or a warm glass of milk might help you to doze off again. Take care!</p>
<p>If your son was drinking, how do you know if the girl wasn’t as well? She may not have been “as” intoxicated as son, which is why it was agreed that she drive. I would suspect that she had been drinking, too (if the story is true that she was driving.).</p>
<p>Does your son know this girl? You’re likely going to get to the bottom of this if you name the girl. What if she says that she wasn’t the one driving? </p>
<p>I agree that your son will be surprised at the price/time it will take to fix the car. </p>
<p>(advice for the future: Tell your kids that you’ll pay for any taxi, no questions asked, if they’ve had some drinks and need to get home/back to dorm. )</p>
<p>Even if you tell the insurance company the girl was driving the car, it will be your insurance policy which will pay for any repairs. If the company determines the accident to be the driver’s fault, then any surcharge will be imposed on your policy. The driver may be charged with an at-fault accident too which could affect her driving record and the cost of her insurance. </p>
<p>Assuming the story your son gave to you is accurate, the insurance company may determine the driver is not at fault which will spare you and the driver of any penalties or higher insurance premiums in the future, although you will be responsible for the deductible. I would say it is unlikely they are going to determine the driver is not at fault considering she floored it to back off the grass. You may want to think about what you tell the insurance company.</p>
<p>I would think about getting a quote for repairs and then decide whether to inform the insurance company. I suspect anything the insurer pays out will be collected back from you in increased premiums. The insurer of the CAR will bear the costs of the increased premiums and if you have linked coverage on your vehicles, it may likely raise premiums on ALL the linked vehicles for a period of time (perhaps 3 years).</p>
<p>Agree with telling kids you will pay for ANY taxi, no Qs asked if they ever need one to get home/back to a safe place after they’ve had drink or are for any reason unable to get where they need to without a taxi. It’s a small price to pay and much better than most alternatives.</p>
<p>Was just going to say what HImom said. With a 10 yr old vehicle, they may total it anyway. What is the deductible? and if the story is true, the parents of the girl probably dont want it reported to the insu co either. The insu company might make you call the police to file a report, and then you may be facing charges of some sort, even though they say they were cut off (who knows). Have the kids pay. </p>
<p>your son and the girl are safe. The truck can be repaired. keep that perspective in mind.</p>
<p>Agree with Himom about thinking hard about sharing with insurance company. Often one can find parts, like the mirror, at used car yards. It sounds like your son is taking responsibility, and will want to reimburse you for expenses.</p>
<p>Regardless of who was driving, I would avoid the insurance company on this one altogether. S2 needs to find a way to reimburse you and dad for the damage (over time if necessary). Fix anything that is a safety requirement and leave the other damage until the money is available. The reminders of driving around with the damage may help reinforce the lesson.</p>
<p>In some states, you may have to report an accident just to get the car repaired…that may cause another issue.</p>
<p>It doesn’t really matter if the girl was driving or not as far as insurance goes in most states. S1 was involved in a similar situation…borrowed roommate’s truck to move some furniture…vision impaired by pile of furniture in the bed of the truck…changed lanes and sideswiped another vehicle…police arrive…tells S that the insurance follows the vehicle not the driver. The roommate’s insurance paid for the repairs. So if the story is true or not, it really doesn’t matter. If your S willfully gave the girl the keys and asked her to drive, it’s his responsibility. </p>
<p>S1 had a couple of fender benders early on in his driving career. We always got an estimate on the repairs and then figured out if it was cheaper to pay out of pocket or use the insurance resulting in a higher monthly premium</p>
<p>It isn’t simply a higher monthly premium sometimes. Its having your insurance non-renewed. At that point you’ll be scrambling to find coverage and you’ll pay a small fortune to get it. I haven’t had that happen with auto insurance, but it did happen to me with my homeowners. </p>
<p>^^^That did happen to us after S1 had a DUI and did $4500 worth of damage to the car. The nice insurance company told us they’d continue to insure DH and me, but S1 was on his own. We had to find new insurance for all of us, and it was very expensive.</p>
<p>First of all good morning. Hope you got some sleep.</p>
<p>Almost all kids mess up big and almost all kids try to lie about it or omit some facts.</p>
<p>Since it is your husbands baby (the truck) I would suggest you let your husband deal with your son. Sometimes man to man is the best way to go with these things. You can google around and figure out what might happen to your insurance in your state…or tell us what state and someone might have experience.</p>
<p>Fixing the truck will be a learning experience for your son. </p>
<p>If I was dad I would ask where this happened and have him show me. Should be tire tracks and a certain mud splatter on the truck. The pole might have some paint on it. This little exercise might help bring out the truth.</p>
<p>My kid had a couple fender benders. I would like to say we made her pay. We did not. We should have. Called and used the insurance on one and payed $100 extra a month for three years. Also the insurance company treated all 4 drivers on the insurance as one…so that any one of us got a ticket or had an accident they would pull the insurance. Yikes.</p>
<p>I am beginning to believe car insurance is really there for bodily injury more than anything else.</p>
<p>Good luck. Thank god no one was hurt.</p>
<p>Sometimes it takes an accident to make kids aware of how quickly an accident can happen and how much damage can be done. That your son found this out without any major injuries may be the best thing that happened.</p>
<p>Agree with not dealing with insurance company. You’ll end up paying for it one way or the other, and it may end up costing more with increased premiums and risk of losing insurance. Thank goodness no one was hurt. This will hopefully be a good learning experience for your son.</p>
<p>since no one was tested for drinking, I don’t see how that will come in at this point. I think it will just get treated as an accident.</p>
<p>Yes, it will go on the OP’s insurance. They won’t really even be able to charge the girl with the deductible in many cases because some courts have already ruled in such cases and when the driver is doing you a favor, you get stuck with the deductible…as long as they weren’t doing something nutty/crazy.</p>
<p>My first concern would not be the cost of the repairs and who would pay but to confirm the facts of the accident with a sober son. Hopefully he told you the truth. Hopefully whoever was driving didn’t hit something besides the pole and more importantly confirm no injuries. Best of luck.</p>
<p>I hope you were able to get some more sleep! The advice you’ve gotten is very good.<br>
A similar thing happened in a family I know, but the son’s “friend” hit a parked car and did quite a bit of damage to it as well as totaling his (well his dad’s) car. Ugh.</p>
<p>I think this is the best possible outcome that one could have when teenagers are involved in this sort of thing. It can, and often does, end badly. Your son and his friends were lucky. I agree with another poster that the repairs and who pays for them is secondary. I would focus on impressing upon your son just how fortunate he was this time around and discuss what the consequences of his actions should be. Teenagers are teenagers and we all will be faced with these sorts of situations. But as parents, drinking and driving is one situation that we have to make sure only happens once, if at all. </p>