<p>Whoa. He’d have a cow if you opened a separate account, but not if he found you had a separate credit card??
And as for daughters future wedding, just tell him you will model it after your niece’s if he doesnt cooperate.</p>
<p>Well, mothers day is coming up. I am guessing you want a selmer clarinet for mothers day :)</p>
<p>We have credit cards in both of our names, together and separately. It’s absolutely a good idea to have credit scores in both of your names, and give you the flexibility of discretionary spending, if needed. </p>
<p>I pay all the bills and am doing the taxes today. Which means, I am not doing the taxes, because I am procrastinating here on CC!</p>
<p>Absolutely. Every mom I know wants a clarinet for Mother’s Day. ;)</p>
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<p>Avoiding pain - seems reasonable to me !!</p>
<p>Having your name on joint accounts gives each of you your own credit report. There is no reason to have separate credit cards if the sole purpose is for a credit score. </p>
<p>I don’t understand the “his money”, “my money” in a marriage.</p>
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Oh that is classic. Sister is planning a christening right now, so this would really get him!</p>
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That’s why the credit card wouldn’t bother him, plus he would expect me to keep the payment within the amount of discretionary income I have left every month.</p>
<p>Agree that everyone should have credit in their own name. But having a credit card in one name only in a family that handles all monies together is asking for trouble.</p>
<p>My DH and I are pretty supportive of each others purchases, basically since neither one of us are big spenders. And I pay the bills so I’d see purchases (hard to surprise each other). Only thing I absolutely will not, NOT did I say NOT support is a motorcycle. No,. NO… NO</p>
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I’m going to tell him you said this.</p>
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We don’t have his money or my money in any meaningful sense, that’s exactly the point. Everything is pooled and allocated. We are very financially prudent, but the discretionary income amount is skewed because I contribute most of mine back into my 401-k and he doesn’t have to. If we actually had separate money, this wouldn’t be an issue.</p>
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<p>Genius. Or the next 3 mother’s day gifts, on an installment plan. “But dear, don’t you love me?” You don’t have to buy a mother’s day or birthday gift for the next three years. Just look how much I’m saving you?"</p>
<p>If I did that to my husband, he’d give me points for creativity.</p>
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I can totally see that. It comes back to something you can’t live with. There are plenty of things that should be dealbreakers in a marriage and this is one. </p>
<p>Maybe I’m passively-aggressively bothered by the fact that he is begrudging me this clarinet while preparing for his condo. Seems a little disproportionate to me.</p>
<p>MY typo-- its a Selmer. Selby is a wine. You can ask for that too. Its very good wine. Served at the white house. I recommend the “Bobcat” zinfandel.</p>
<p>Or replace the engagement ring. It could all add up.</p>
<p>Is the bride from Hell pregnant already?</p>
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This is definitely the quote of the thread! Have you been partaking already?</p>
<p>Condo??? Ummm, that tips the scales a bit, I would say!!</p>
<p>Well I am off to buy my mothers day gift-- hiking shoes. My feet need to be there for the purchase. He is fully supportive of this gift. He calls any attempt at buying jewlery for me “a start”. And I am not a big jewelry person. I tend to lose it. This is not a good thing.</p>
<p>Too bad I sold my Buffet. It was not as sweet as the first one I had, but it was a pretty pretty instrument.</p>
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No, it’s her son’s very lovely, gracious wife who just had a baby. My sister is eight hundred million times worse with this Christening than she was with the wedding. My husband and kids, including son, all sat me down and said they will not come.</p>
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Yeah, didn’t I mention that? He is planning to buy a condo somewhere warm using the lump sum (separate from pension and benefits) he will receive from NYC when he retires. That’s why he wants the decks cleared before he retires. I wonder what if he would say if I decided to buy the clarinet now.</p>
<p>Steve, </p>
<p>There is a difference between establishing joint cards and adding on a new user. Back in my parents’ day, dad had the card and mom got to use it. </p>
<p>The last car we bought, even though it was MY car and we got a loan on joint income and filled out the loan papers as joint users, the payment book was made out to my husband. Kind of irritating. His initial in the alphabet is before mine. It may have just been a mistake, but it really annoyed me. </p>
<p>For us, we both have our own individual cards for our consulting small businesses, as well as joint ones for our family. </p>
<p>We do have different credit scores. It doesn’t make sense, and they in a similar range, but not the same. My credit score is actually higher than his.</p>
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Not yet, but obviously its on my mind. Friday the 13th is a good day for me. In elementary school I got moved up an entire row to first chair in the clarinet section of the band on Fri the 13th (5th grade), I ment my DH on a Fri the 13th (obviously not in 5th grade), he met my parents on a Fri the 13th (28 yrs ago today) and the Fri before our weekend wedding was a Fri the 13th. This is a good day for me. Am thinking about the wines in the cellar…</p>
<p>Here’s the Selby winery-- female owned and run. <a href=“https://selbywinery.com/index.html[/url]”>https://selbywinery.com/index.html</a></p>
<p>So, with this condo - he will be living in it after he retires, without you? Did I read that wrong? </p>
<p>Maybe I missed something. Likely.</p>