<p>I don’t drink either. Not a thing.</p>
<p>But it’s immaterial. So many murder victims are drunk, too.</p>
<p>I’ve never heard of it being brought up, ever.</p>
<p>somewhere around 85% of those in prison were drunk when committing the violent crime, and nobody ever talks about this.</p>
<p>Do I think it’s a good idea to go around drinking to blackout? No.</p>
<p>Do I think that being that drunk gives someone else the right to rape that person? What are we even talking about?</p>
<p>We aren’t talking about the right to rape, poetgrl. I was asking my friend romanigypsyeyes to be careful, I specifically decoupled that request from the topic of rape.</p>
<p>GFG, no matter how many things you tell your daughter to teach her to protect herself, crimes happen. If you believe that all crimes can be prevented by those who are preyed upon, that’s fine.</p>
<p>It’s simply not true.</p>
<p>You are conflating two things, here, and you are making assumptions about what I would tell my daughter based on the fact that I refuse to say a victim is responsible for her rape. I do not think these are the same.</p>
<p>No matter what you say to me, I will never believe a young woman is responsible for her own rape.</p>
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<p>My understanding is that alcohol does reduce inhibitions against certain facets of someone’s personality that was already present. </p>
<p>However, it won’t introduce negative behavioral traits that weren’t already present within a given individual. </p>
<p>In short, using “I’m drunk” to imply the behavior was totally due to drink and not due to hidden personality traits already present but normally held in check by socialized inhibition is a complete crock.</p>
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<p>I believe in empowering young women. </p>
<p>But, nothing will eliminate rape on college campuses, or even decrease rape on college campuses, besides getting rid of the criminals.</p>
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<p>No worries, ZM. I’m too cheap to get ripped off at a bar by wasting money on drinks :)</p>
<p>(Come on, $6 for a beer??)</p>
<p>That’s what I like to hear! I worry, I can’t help it. When you almost lose a chld it stays with you.</p>
<p>all the recent media discussion: Let’s teach men not to rape - vs - Let’s teach women how to protect themselves from rape…</p>
<p>really a sort of ah ha! moment for me. I am the mother of sons and quite liked that new emphasis, focusing on teaching the men.</p>
<p>Yes I firmly believe drugs and alcohol are excuses many predators throw out ala Sgt Krumke in West Side Story. It can also render anyone more vulnerable to crime. It’s not blaming to recognize just observations. Blacking our being incapacitated to the point of needing assistance makes one even more vulnerable. In a perfect world this might not be so, but in the world I and my family live in, that is life. Our kids and their loved ones understand this and act accordingly. It doesn’t make them invulnerable just improves their odds in life which is something we value. </p>
<p>Like the anti-bullying training, lets teach everyone to help protect against predatory behavior. That will make our world a better and safer place. Everyone has a role to play and embrace.</p>
<p>A friend of mine’s adult daughter was the victim of date rape (had a bit too much to drink, someone, an big man on campus, offered to take her back to her room and then refused to leave) and it has devastated them. She is having panic attacks, had to move, you name it. Sure, she should not have had too much to drink, but she should not have been raped. Plain and simple. It is a truly sad day when you cannot trust someone to treat you right.</p>
<p>Let’s remember that the best survey we have of college rape victims says that 45% of women who are raped hadn’t been drinking AT ALL, and of the remaining 55%, the vast majority of them were likely not drunk.</p>
<p>The problem is not alcohol; it’s criminals and criminality, and the fact that college campuses don’t seem to mind much about having both on campus.</p>
<p>I suppose the other message you’d like to send teenage girls is that it doesn’t matter what they wear, because their choice of clothing doesn’t communicate any thing at all about themselves or their values?</p>
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<p>I’ve only skimmed some of the posts on this thread and have not been following the story in the media, but I will say this.</p>
<p>What I think several people are trying to say is that regardless of anything about the criminals, what is empowering is for a young woman to know what things she can do to help lower her odds of being a victim. </p>
<p>Example: If 10 crimes a week are committed after 6pm at the corner of Elk and Maple, it’s helpful to know this so you can avoid being in that spot by yourself in the dark of the night, right? Doesn’t mean it’s okay for anyone to commit a crime there, but it helps protect <em>you</em> to know that’s a bad place to go by yourself at that hour.</p>
<p>Oh for the love of pete. Provincial thinking. Maybe they should wear burqas, since we know that protects women from assault :rolleyes:</p>
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<p>In many parts of NYC depending on the beer, $6 is considered pretty reasonable. </p>
<p>I only drink socially at parties or when I meet up with friends for a bar night. </p>
<p>My personal rule is to always eat a full meal beforehand and limit myself to 1-2 drinks. When asked about this by younger friends, this is what I told them I do for myself. </p>
<p>Granted…the last is mainly because I’d rather spend that money on a good meal, books, electric guitars/amps, or computer/tech gadgets.</p>
<p>now we’re going to blame the girls/women based on what they’re wearing.</p>
<p>seriously???</p>
<p>great point JYM626</p>
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<p>Getting nasty doesn’t make you any more right.</p>
<p>Wasnt talking to you, and wasnt being nasty. Blaming the girls clothing, now IMO thats nasty. Your post popped in as I was attempting to respond to the “blame it on the provocative clothing” line. That thinking, IMO is palentologic. Apology accepted.</p>
<p>I was attacked wearing a baseball uniform. What’s that say about my character?? Disgusting!</p>
<p>Your post followed mine, Jym, so I thought it was directed to me. There’s no apology, just an explanation that I had a normal, natural reaction to your post based on its timing.</p>