Steubenville

<p>I admit I dont read that site, I was trying to find a link with the picture with Iggy that wasn’t a blog ( which is against TOS)
Ill keep looking. ( but when I look at it, everything is about the lulu see through pants)</p>

<p>The link you posted in Fashionista has a photo with a muscular man in a slink dress carrying designer handbag. The other articles were mentioned below the photo.</p>

<p>Below my screen grab is an article about Kate Upton, one about Kate Moss, something about lululemon and the " best" celebrity nip slips. :rolleyes:</p>

<p>What version of the site you see can depend on the last time you dumped your cookies, what preferences you are using, what browser & OS that you use.</p>

<p>Anyway- along with my public service announcement to be aware of your browser settings
<a href=“https://www.us-cert.gov/publications/securing-your-web-browser[/url]”>https://www.us-cert.gov/publications/securing-your-web-browser&lt;/a&gt;&lt;/p&gt;

<p>I wanted to post info from the woman who made it her mission to expose the communication between the defendants.
[I&lt;/a&gt; Am The Blogger Who Allegedly The Steubenville Gang Rape Case – | xoJane](<a href=“Dotdash Meredith - America's Largest Digital & Print Publisher”>Dotdash Meredith - America's Largest Digital & Print Publisher)</p>

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<p>Has anybody heard about the Torrington, Connecticut case in the news now? So similar to the Ohio case, but involving two 17 year old guys and two 13 year old girls. Same culture, slightly different situation, but entirely too similar debate.</p>

<p>I would point out that at least one of the tweeters in Steubenville said more than once that what they did was wrong. “You shouldn’t have done that if she was hammered” or words to that effect. Apparently he wasn’t there. So it’s not like NONE of them knew it was wrong. They don’t have that excuse.</p>

<p>And one in Henderson County, North Carolina, where a girl was raped at a sheriff deputy’s house
[4</a> Henderson County teens accused of raping female, 16, who was ‘mentally incapacitated and physically helpless’ | GoUpstate.com](<a href=“http://www.goupstate.com/article/20121219/WIRE/121219627]4”>http://www.goupstate.com/article/20121219/WIRE/121219627)</p>

<p>I did notice that Consolation, and I was both surprised that he was so persistent about it in the face of flat denial by the others, but I was also surprised that the others all seemed to think it was aok.</p>

<p>Its one thing not to realize that it would be considered rape, but how can they possibly not know it was wrong?</p>

<p>[The</a> Eastern Echo :: Steubenville highlights bigger education issues](<a href=“http://www.easternecho.com/article/2013/03/steubenville-highlights-bigger-education-issues]The”>Steubenville highlights bigger education issues | The Eastern Echo)</p>

<p>The young man who sent the tweets saying it was wrong is the same person who can be heard in the Nodi video saying “WHat if it was your sister?” He’s one of the few people who sound sober. According to Mr. Howarth’s interview, he was one of the kids who was at the Howarth home (without booze) all night. </p>

<p>Definite shout out to his parents. However, I wish he’d tried to prevent the other guys from taking the victim with him.</p>

<p>I think people distance themselves from victims and objectify them. I suspect if you asked them if they would have any problem with their GF, sister or loved one to be treated as this victim was treated they might squirm if they were honest. They somehow were able to classify the victim as a disposable object that they could amuse themselves as they chose. To them unconsciousness or silence meant you ceased to be a person and were a THING.</p>

<p>Some of the silence could have been fear that the defendants might turn ugly at whomever spoke up. There can be a significant amount of bullying in groups, especially in a sports culture and team.</p>

<p>On the subject of sports t-shirts, I’ve seen variations on this cross country one:</p>

<p>“I’m too XC for my shirt.”</p>

<p>A while back I posted on CC about my youngest D’s youth track team that wanted the kids to stand outside Hooters and hand out coupons which would earn the team a portion of the proceeds from meals bought there. I was the only parent who had any concerns about this. While many of the kids on this team were still young, there were other older, developed girls on the team too. I objected to both the choice of establishment, and the plan to have the children stand outside the restaurant promoting it. People did not understand what why I made “a big deal” about it–said things like “The waitresses at Applebees wearier skimpier costumes,” and “Hooters is like a family place now.”</p>

<p>GFG, that’s the same thread I mentioned above, where we also discussed bikini carwashes.</p>

<p>The name of the boy who objected to what was going on was Sean McGhee. Good for Sean, and a shout out to his parents indeed.</p>

<p>Many college apparrel, especially logo items sold on campus bookstores have sexual inuendos and double-entendres. They sell.</p>

<p>Yes, it is common for people to have the “pretty HS girls” wear bikinis and hold signs on the street advertising carwashes.</p>

<p>[Torrington’s</a> Football Rape Case Is Sad, Infuriating, and Familiar - Alexander Abad-Santos - The Atlantic Wire](<a href=“http://www.theatlanticwire.com/national/2013/03/torringtons-rape-case/63386/]Torrington’s”>http://www.theatlanticwire.com/national/2013/03/torringtons-rape-case/63386/)</p>

<p>“Two athletes for Torrington High School’s football team in Connecticut have been arrested for allegedly raping two 13-year-old girls. Those girls were then reportedly bullied and harassed online by students at Torrington High suggesting that they “wanted” the attacks by “hanging around” with older students whose lives they say will be “destroyed.” Screen shots of tweets compiled by Jessica Glenza of The Register Citizen in northwestern Connecticut reveal a picture of young victims of alleged sexual assault and the social-media reaction they confronted in the weeks since they came forward — a picture that seems familiar to many online as tensions simmer following the Steubenville rape trial and that sent school administrators into tears on Wednesday.”</p>

<p>Suggestive clothing doesnt bother me as long as it is aimed at adults- which college students are. ( and as long as it doesnt demean anyone)
( I will add the caveat that I think suggestive clothing for everyday wear is trashy- but- clothes looked different on me when I was 38-24-34 but that didn’t mean that I shouldn’t be able to wear slim fitting clothing or have cleavage- after all I do now, and that is certainly not my waist size anymore!)
Some of my daughters friends ( sports team maybe) had some shirts printed up - on the sly- not as official school shirts. They were also not distributed till after high school graduation & to my knowledge she has never worn hers. I was shocked, but not as shocked as I would have been were she even a year younger. She also ( without me asking) told me that she wasnt in on the slogan selection. So at least she recognized that it was tasteless.
( their school teams are the Bulldogs & the tee said " giving the dawgs a bone since _____"whatever year they were freshmen.)
Of course I am still so clueless that I had to think about it for a minute before I got it.</p>

<p>Reading this thread has brought up so many questions and comments. I should’ve written them down as I was reading.</p>

<p>Up first is the subject of the boys’ guilt. If you read the transcript of the texts read in court (someone posted a link a few pages back) you will see that Mays admits to one friend that he “fu<em>&#d” Jane Doe. Later on he denies it. An similar issue is raised regarding her being roofied. A careful reading suggests to me that he did indeed penetrate her with his </em>** and she was drugged.
Naturally this is impossible to prove now. But I think this goes more to his mindset than any of the other evidence. He knew enough to start back pedaling.</p>

<p>Way back in the thread, Poetgirl or Emerald Kitty posted that girls who have been raped are more likely to become repeat victims. Why is this? </p>

<p>Years ago I did a story about how predators choose their prey. The researchers individually showed the same video footage of people on the street to a wide range of criminals: muggers, robbers, rapists & murderers.
Each one chose the same “victims.” And they weren’t always women. They chose the people they viewed as the weakest based on posture, stature and on occasion, distractedness. These monsters are culling from the herd.</p>

<p>While it would have been wonderful if Sean had gotten ANY support when he tried to suggest that what they were doing with the victim wasn’t right, since he got none when he made the suggestions, he likely decided it best better not to turn their antagonism against him by “spoiling the fun,” and was silenced. This is the culture of bullying and having social norms that say, “anything goes” if WE the kings enjoy it. We can act with impunity, there are no consequences.</p>

<p>Bullies are shown to switch targets (especially when fueled with alcohol and ‘group think’) and Sean probably decided the risk of being the new target wasn’t worth it.</p>

<p>And to continue with the theme of vulnerability, it’s true that if Girl A fights off rapist that he may continue onto Girl B. My hope is that enough women & girls can defend themselves until such time that we change attitudes of men and women about what rape culture really looks like.</p>

<p>Absolutely, HIMom – this is a rape and bullying culture. I’ve stressed to both my daughter and my son that slut shaming is not allowed in this house. Nor is bullying of any kind.</p>

<p>I am proud to say my kids have been known to befriend and defend vulnerable loners, at personal risk to themselves and their social status. D’s friends have also always defended her from attacks, even when the attacks were being made by school authority figures and could have affected them academically. I am so pleased that she has now had many of these GFs for 10+ years and we all hope they will remain lifetime friends. </p>

<p>S has not enjoyed that same social network but has also taken unpopular stands, even as a child, he would face down teens littering the mall with their trash and say to them, “Pick it up and put it where it belongs.” </p>

<p>It takes courage to do what is right, especially if it is unpopular. We all need to help give our kids and loved ones this strength through leading by example. We have to stand shoulder to shoulder with victims and collectively change social norms so ALL are safer in our communities and world. </p>

<p>My kids went to a U were sports, especially football was and is a GOD and athletes are worshipped. When S started at the U he was delighted to attend these events and bought season tickets. I believe both he and D found the culture of alcohol, hard partying, and hero status of athletes too upsetting to continue attending sporting events at their U.</p>

<p>*Way back in the thread, Poetgirl or Emerald Kitty posted that girls who have been raped are more likely to become repeat victims. Why is this? *
victims appear vulnerable.
Either they are physically vulnerable ( small, slight) or emotionally vulnerable ( quiet & timid), I was both and even before I was attacked, I felt more diminished than others. ( i suspect I am somewhere on the spectrum, but this was before IDEA)
Like I didnt fit in & that what I thought didn’t matter.
It isnt hard to spot someone who makes a perfect victim, they dont have to be physically incapacitated.</p>

<p>Being attacked just confirms that they are different than others.</p>