<p>It drives me nuts at work. People are pulled aside pronto about showing up for work on time…which means at your desk, not off chatting getting coffee, sitting in the parking lot making phone calls, etc. I tell the employees, in my opinion being late is stealing time. Being 15 minutes late every day is an hour and 15 minutes a week/5 hours a month and over the course of a year is essentially a week and a half of work time. If that’s how they want to use their vacation time that’s fine, but they are made aware that’s how it’s being tallied.</p>
<p>I have a friend who is always late. The funny thing is I’m the one they joke around about for being on time. </p>
<p>When I worked 12 hour shifts at the hospital, I noticed that rarely was anyone EVER late to work. You would be excoriated by your co-workers if this were a habit. A nurse who has been up all night taking care of patients and is ready to GTH out of there and go to bed will NOT stand by and say nothing about someone who habitually stands in her way of doing that. Same with the day shift nurse who wants to get home before 8 pm and see her kids before it’s time to put them to bed. Someone who cannot be on time to work just wouldn’t last long in that environment. </p>
<p>Same with my PRN jobs. The docs would not tolerate the nurse being late. A case cannot begin without 2 nurses on premises, and the docs are tapping their feet enough as it is because after they finish with cases, they usually have office appointments or other obligations at the hospital. Just not a career which is a good match for someone who can’t be on time.</p>
<p>^^^
I’m wondering if people who have what it takes to become RNs are not the type to be late? or they’re like my BIL who is never late to court, but is late to everything else.</p>
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<p>We were seeing this movie which started at 9, and we to make it to the movie we should leave the house around 8:30. This woman told us at 8:30 we should get going, then she proceeded to tell us it would take her only a minute to address an envelope so she could mail it on our way to the movie, then she went into the kitchen to take something out to be defrosted for next day’s dinner, and then put a load of laundry in. By the time she was done it was around 9. This happened all weekend. I was ready to kill her.</p>
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<p>I would guess that if this lady had a serious interest in getting to the destination on time, she would have skipped doing all those things. That seems to make the difference. My BIL does things like this…can’t get his fanny out the door…stops to do other unnecessary stuff.</p>
<p>The doctors my family goes to are always late. It doesn’t matter if your slot is the first one in the day or right after their lunch break, they will still be late. Orthopedists probably have the worst wait time–at least, 45 min. One of my kids went to an orthodontist in a frou-frou neighborhood every 4 weeks. We always had to wait for at least 20 minutes. I wish we could go to go to a different ortho but you can’t because we already signed a contract. I love our dentist though. She is almost always on time. If she’s running late one of her staff comes out and apologizes for the wait.</p>
<p>My H will probably say I’m late for certain events but that is because he underestimates the amount of time I have to prepare. He surprises me and says we have to be at this event at X time but it in reality, I require Y no. of hours to be ready because I have to do this and that.</p>
<p>Could be. I think accountability is a lot of it. You are late to work in a hospital or surgery center environment, you are fired or your co-workers make things very uncomfortable for you. A judge can make your life hard as an attorney if you are late. Consequences which hurt can really improve the ability of a person to be punctual.</p>
<p>DH can be on time. When he coached the girls’ soccer, basketball, or softball teams, he was ALWAYS early, getting set up, etc. When our girls played elite club sports, he had them to practice and games on time, every time because he knew at level, coaches will cut or bench them if they are habitually late. If we have an appt. with a lawyer, we are on time (because we are paying for the atty’s time?). </p>
<p>Beats me. I think that because I know he CAN get somewhere on time, it annoys me more than dealing with someone who just never seems to be able to get it together.</p>
<p>We are meeting someone for dinner. We agreed to leave at 6:25. I am sitting on the couch having been ready for 15 minutes. When I walked downstairs a few minutes ago, he was in his boxers trimming his toenails at 6:25.</p>
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My H will probably say I’m late for certain events but that is because he underestimates the amount of time I have to prepare. He surprises me and says we have to be at this event at X time but it in reality, I require Y no. of hours to be ready because I have to do this and that.</p>
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<p>do you mean that your H will suddenly tell you about certain plans, such as: We have to be at (new info event) in an hour? </p>
<p>I would think that after doing that one time he’d learn that you may have to shower, wash your hair, launder an outfit, etc…which can take a lot more time.</p>
<p>The cure for that is, "no, I can’t be ready in time. I need at least X hours notice. " And if he knew several hours or days in advance, but didn’t tell you, then he needs to be knocked upside the head. ;)</p>
<p>Actually, my concern would be that he is leaving his options open til the last minute, and when he decides to actually go, you’re supposed to miraculously be ready. </p>
<p>One way to be on time at work is to have an assistant come in to let you know when you are running late. I used to tell my assistant that I need 5 minutes break between meetings so I could go to the bathroom.</p>
<p>@mom2collegekids I keep telling him that and by the same token, he keeps telling me I don’t need to spend x number of hours on hair & makeup and picking an outfit. ; </p>
<p>He has no business telling you how long you need for grooming to your standards. You’re an adult. You have the right to determine whether you need 1 hour or 2 hours or more. We are women…we may need “root touch ups,” a fave outfit laundered, hair washed, blown-out, trimmed, or what-have-you. And god-forbid if we need eyebrows tweezed! You CAN’T do that right before an occasion otherwise you’ll have red/puffy eyes. </p>
<p>it’s not the same token (and don’t let him tell you it is!). You’re just asking for the basic courtesy of knowing about a social obligation soon after he learns of one. He’s ignoring that courtesy and putting the blame on you. </p>
<p>this is no different than the kid who remembers at 10 pm that he was supposed to tell “mom” that she needs to make cupcakes for class tomorrow. When the mom says, “you should have told me earlier,” the same token is not, “you shouldn’t take so long to bake cupcakes.”</p>
<p>Regarding nurses. I saw one last week for a botox shot. The appt was 9:30 and she showed up at 10:15 which I know because I saw her big black SUV pull into the side parking lot. Then after about 5 minutes with me she excused herself to go pay a caterer. Yep, that’s what she said. Her brother-in-law is the doctor and the practice is very successful. </p>
<p>@mom2collegekids I know but he gives me his irresistible smile when he says it and ends it with nonsense that I always look ___ (insert a very pleasing adjective since I don’t really want to say it) and I eat it up.</p>
<p>I had a thought…If your H refuses to give you a proper “heads up” that you’ll be expected to attend a social function, then have a couple “premade texts” on your phone. Then, every morning send him a text that says: Are we going anywhere this evening? And, when he replies, “no,” then send the other premade text: “ok, but FYI…Last Call is 1pm today for any obligations.” </p>
<p>I simple copy/paste and send each morning should do the trick. </p>
<p>I seriously think that one reason he’s not giving you a proper heads up is because he’s waiting until later in the day to determine whether HE feels up to going to the function later that day. So, if it’s 3pm and he’s determined that he’s willing to go to X occasion, then he lets you know…and you’re supposed to “hop to it.” Well, don’t hop. </p>
<p>and of course you always look beautiful…I already knew that. :)</p>
<p>I’m not sure why people who have disorders and syndromes can get places on time when they have to (e.g., court or other work places). Some - granted, not all by any stretch - of these disorders may be pure selfishness amd nothing more complicated. As Dstark said in his original post, if they can get their act together when it suits them, then they are simply choosing not to get their act together when it doesn’t suit them, and that’s plIn selfish. </p>
<p>I chose the first appt of the day with my new dentist. He kept me waiting 45 minutes, and didn’t apologize. Six months later, he was late again for the first appointment of the day. After 30 minutes, I asked the receptionist if they did in fact enforce charging patients if we fail to show up without canceling 24 hours in advance. She said yes, they have to do that because the doctor’s time was valuable we needed to let them know. </p>
<p>So I advised her I was leaving because I had a meeting; and if the dentist kept me waiting the next time, I would deduct 50% of the fee. If he charged me for not being there, I felt it was only fair for me to charge him. The receptionist just rolled her eyes and said if other patients took the same approach, he’d get off his lazy rear end and get there on time instead of forcing her to deal with all the angry patients. </p>
<p>I have a friend from elementary school who I saw about a year and a half ago when she was in town for an event with her H and one of her sons. We all had lunch together, and at some point they were describing what it was like to live in a family with three sons (she had two others); she then made a comment that her H “limits their showers to five minutes each.” I about wanted to fall off my chair when she said this. Who tells their spouse how long they can spend in the shower??? FWIW… she has been the primary breadwinner of the family - his career has been less than focused. </p>
<p>I think if my H only allowed me 15 minutes to get ready, I would do whatever I could n the 15 minutes and just go.
Then if anyone commented on my appearance, I would just refer them to H.
Next time he will probably allow more time!</p>
<p>My H though actually takes way more time than me.
I can be ready and he still is n the shower.
I think he naps in there.</p>
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