I’ve been reading comments about how a number of students feel pressure to attend a “top” university and that attending anything less than a “top” school is a major letdown and foreshadows not-so-great outcomes for their lives.
I have a few questions that I hope students will address:
-
Where do you think this belief is coming from? How, if at all, does the College Confidential community add to that belief?
-
What can posters (whether students or parents) on College Confidential do to promote a mindset that prioritizes finding colleges where a given student will thrive and that are affordable for the poster’s family, whether the admission rate is 9% or 90%?
This thread has been started to hear from students. Parents are welcome to ask clarifying questions or to see what students think of a potential solution/suggestion, but the primary role for parents in this thread is to listen to what students are saying.
15 Likes
For me, this belief comes from peers, A2C reddit, and family members and people of my cultural background. Especially from an immigrant background, they only know big name (HYPSM) and the local competitive schools. I don’t think CC adds to this belief. When I snoop around in other threads, it’s really positive about schools that are looked down on by prestige-hunting students lol. It’s made me change my opinion about a lot.
I think one big fear at least for me of not going to a “prestigious” school is job outcomes/income, and also feeling like your efforts went to waste if you don’t go to a competitive school. I think this forum is already a good balance between affordability, best environment & not focusing much on admission rate.
12 Likes
I would be interested in hearing more about the feeling of “my efforts going to waste” that I hear students express. I don’t remember ever hearing this idea expressed back in the 1980s when I applied, and I would like to learn more about it.
6 Likes
This isn’t really how I personally feel but the vibe I’m getting from peers. You take APs, dual enrollment, invest a lot of time and effort into school, you study for tests and score well on the SAT. You don’t really know what you’re working towards, but it’s to look like a good applicant on paper. Then, you’re at the same college as someone who maybe didn’t put in as much effort. I feel like with a lot of things you see visible result from putting in effort. The greater, the effort, the greater result. But then for college admissions, this effort doesn’t always translate directly to a “better” outcome, at least in terms of where you end up. Being more driven and motivated in college I believe matters more than where you specifically go.
4 Likes
When you’re used to seeing hard work lead to clear results like studying and then acing a test, it feels really upsetting when that formula doesn’t hold. You can be the student who took on the toughest classes, spent weekends doing extracurriculars, stressed over essays and test scores… and then see someone who didn’t really do any of that (or maybe you thought they didn’t) end up at the same college as you.
4 Likes
A student shared this information with me via private message and indicated that I could share this on the thread:
I can give you my answer to said post right here: you are congratulated for attending certain universities and not for others. And how parents on here CONSTANTLY treat some universities as achievements to be proud of and others as places you would only go to for financial reasons or if you were given a tough hand in admissions. That duhumanizing, humiliating line between an academic career to be proud of and an academic career that holds no weight.
If you want, you can also add how everyone’s going to rush and say things like “well thats not me, college is valuable no matter where you go!” But actions speak louder than words. Some are worse offenders than others. A big one is saying rankings don’t matter and then offering rankings as a primary reason to attend a certain college. Another big one is saying one can find success at any college as long as they work hard and they should choose based on happiness etc, but low and behold themselves and their entire families went to a “T20” (cringe) school. Or treating kids who get into said school as inherently smarter or more hardworking or more kind than those who don’t. Trust me, that isn’t true haha.
There is a difference between helping students get into the colleges they desire and recognizing the special value in certain schools for certain degrees, and unintentionally or intentionally dismissing the dignity and effort of students who don’t get as lucky. “Get a grip, its just an online forum!” CC is widely regarded as one of the most toxic and pompous college related groups online among students: this sentiment is most obvious on Reddit (which isnt too great either but…) and in real life. Im just a kid man I don’t care, but the reputation of this place definitely takes a hit and if they want that to change they should probably look at making adjustments.
6 Likes
Thank you for sharing that.
2 Likes