We’ve looked into travel costs to these 3 schools and they don’t vary all that much. He could fly to NYC airports for Vassar, but then has to take a train (kind of a hassle). Tickets to MN run higher for us for some reason, but there is a bus from the airport there too. Midd runs a shuttle from BUrlington and Boston at break times. Overall the difference is too small to matter much.
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And yes we had to fill out FAFSA and CSS every year
As an aspect to consider, Vassar’s greater vicinity is not sans mountains. Along these lines, your son may wish to familiarize himself with the Hudson River School and its geographical relationship to Vassar if he hasn’t done so already.
I live near Vassar, and have visited Middlebury. I get it, yes there are the Hudson Highlands and Shawangunks (let alone the Catskills). But come on, guys, Vassar is not at all what I would think of as being near mountains. It’s in a suburban-y location. Middlebury has a very different vibe wrt the outdoors and mountains.
I don’t suppose there’s any way for your son to visit Midd now?
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Agree, except Carleton is on trimesters, not quarters.
@aultra your overemphasis on your son being surrounded by ultra rich people is a misconception. ALL those schools will have some ultra rich students, but no one is driving around in Maserati’s and kids are probably not wearing Prada. I 100% dont think this is an issue and I dont think Middlebury is known for conspicuous wealth. All those colleges will have a percentage of very wealthy students.
The issue of wealthy kids on campus and less well off kids has been discussed many times on CC. Some kids will order grubhub every chance they get, others won’t. LAC students have made a very deliberate decision to be in that environment. Those of us with LAC kids know that our kids had a range of friends, and a lot more people than you might expect receive financial aid. Ton of kids have campus jobs. They will all drink the cheap vodka if they get a chance 
Most of us here have been through this process. Your kid knows himself better than you think he does. Many of us here had second doubts about the colleges (LAC or otherwise) our kids decided to attend. Most of the time, it works out. If your son likes Middlebury best and you’re okay with paying, I’d let him go. It is an excellent college.
@MWolf any thoughts to share on Midd?
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OP: I have read your posts in this thread twice, yet I feel I do not know much about your son.
Would he be comfortable in a very woke/very liberal environment that does not tolerate differing opinions ?
Is he seeking an LGBTQ+ environment ?
Really difficult to assess long-term immersion into a small community based on a single, short visit.
I encourage your son to search online for forums that openly discuss daily life & campus culture at each of these schools by current students and recent graduates in order to view each opportunity with a more discerning eye as LACs tend to be small communities.
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I know lots of Midd grads (I don’t think I know anyone there right now) who have graduated in the last 8 years, and exactly zero of them were from mega wealthy 1% type families. One from a “regular affluent family”- i.e. drove dumpy cars but took nice vacations, had clear trade-offs. The others from middle class families and one in particular who I know was on a very generous need based aid package.
Their social lives all seemed fine. Unlike kids living in Miami who are going to clubs and expensive restaurants (that seems to be common even for kids on need based aid) there isn’t that much to spend money on at Middlebury. Visiting campus you see everyone wearing some version of a fleece jacket, jeans or sweats, carrying a beat up backpack from LL Bean that looks like they’ve been carrying it since middle school.
So while you understand “New England Wealth”, it’s really not in evidence at Middlebury from what I’ve observed on campus and what I’ve been told by recent grads. There is NOT the “BMW’s in the student parking lot while the faculty drives ancient Honda Pilots” phenomenon which you see at many Southern flagships, and even heading to Burlington (the nearest city) is a pretty homespun place. Good vegan restaurant, ice cream and then back to campus is a “date”. Or a bike ride on a Sunday along the path by Lake Champlain.
The mountains ARE gorgeous, and the Vermont State Park system takes full advantage of the terrain. Nice walking paths, climbing paths, even for people who aren’t “rugged outdoors” types. Kayaking and canoeing on some of the smaller lakes in the area is popular in nice weather.
If it were me (and I know it’s not) I would not worry about the money divide. Truly. Coming from Florida I think you have an expectation about what affluent teenagers and 20 year olds are all about, and I don’t think those are the kids who end up at Middlebury.
I WOULD have two concerns about Middlebury- in addition to worrying if I could actually afford it.
1- It is isolated. Not cut off from civilization/living in the wilds of Alaska isolated, but it’s rural Vermont. So if your kid like hustle and bustle, I think there are better matches for him.
2- Getting in and out is a pain. Yes, Amtrak. Yes, airport in Burlington. But bad weather can slow those options down, and having to use another airport in the region and worrying about ground transportation is a pain. Peak travel time- there will be buses and carpools on campus. But a random weekend home for grandma’s 80th birthday- that is time consuming and isn’t something he’ll be eager to do very often.
On the flip side to the isolation- VERY engaged faculty. Professors who love to teach students who love to learn. A very healthy respect and love for the humanities and the arts. A somewhat self-contained campus. Easy to find your people- whether it’s swing dancing lessons or a chess league or informal jazz combo.
A special place. Good luck- three very fine options for a great education.
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OP: Maybe your son’s comment deserves a bit more consideration than just labeling it as nebulous or vague.
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The perspective of a Floridian may differ from that of someone from a more topographically varied area, however.
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We are very liberal family and he is an engaged liberal. He’s sick of living in a red state and cares about politics. He is not LGBTQ.
FWIW, my daughter is about to graduate from a LAC and my husband and I both graduated from them, so we’re familiar with the concept.
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For further perspective, this article on Vassar’s outing club mentions trips extending to the Adirondacks:
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So with the caveats that my kid is from the Midwest, was a Posse Scholar, and was a Neuroscience major.
Yes, Middlebury is indeed a beautiful area, and amazing for outdoor activities. Most of my kid’s friends were in the “no experience with serious wealth”, especially the Posse Scholars. That was not an issue. None were athletes either, and in fact they were all more artistically inclined (for junior year they all got rooms in the art house and were there until graduation), despite the fact that half were STEM majors.
While you don’t have to be an athlete (most aren’t), a kid who does not really like the outdoors would probably miss out on a large part of what makes Midd a great place. My kid fell in love with hiking, birding, night-time walks to see the stars, cross country jogging, and started learning how to ski (but never graduated from the bunny hill). The outdoors in the area are beautiful all four seasons.
However, many of these activities are done in temperatures that a kid from the South may find uncomfortably cold. It is also pretty isolated, and the vast majority of the people that a student will interact with are the other students at the college. Carleton is in a larger urban area, and there is even another great LAC (St Olaf’s is a half hour walk). Vassar is at the edge of an even larger urban center with additional colleges as well.
I have only really heard good things about Carleton and Vassar. Academically, of the three, I think Carleton may have an edge, though all three are superb. However, I think that Vassar may have the edge in humanities (except in languages, which Midd takes first place). If your kid was interested in math, there would be no competition, and I would say Carleton.
I think that, based on what you have told us about your kid, Vassar may be the best fit, but Carleton is a close second, and for a total of $20,000 less, I think that it’s the better choice.
If you had said “my kid loves outdoor activities, doesn’t mind the cold, and can be happy mostly socializing with other students at their college”, I would say that Middlebury is the best place, since your kid loved how it looks and feels. However, seeing Middlebury on a summer day is not living in Middlebury during J-Term, when the average daytime high is below freezing and the average nighttime low is in the teens, and it usually get a lot colder for a few days.
Technically, but for people who live there, it definitely feels like you are in the mountains. Since people live in the mountains because they like feeling that they are living in mountains, technical definitions are not relevant. My kid felt like she was living in the mountain when she was at Middlebury.
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Thank you for this helpful perspective! He absolutely does love the outdoors and is very outdoorsy. His experience with cold is limited, but his sister went to college in Michigan and did fine. I’m not worried about the cold per se, except that it can make outdoors activity hard at times. The isolation concerns me a bit as he is from a city of about 200k with a lot of options and activity, but knowing him, I think it’s probably ok. He expresses no worries about it.
People in Vermont wear better winter clothes than the rest of us. Truly.
A friend lent me a pair of gloves which are made from recycled soda bottles. They look a little strange, but you put them on and your hands are sweaty after five minutes in Boston, Providence, NYC. She assured me that they are “perfect” for long walks in Vermont in January, and I believe her! They wear more suitable footwear, better layers, have those nice soft hats that mush your hair but keep your head toasty.
Middlebury students are out all the time, even when it’s brutally cold. They dress for it. They have fun activities they don’t want to miss with their friends.
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I posted earlier and I thought that his vibe with Carleton might make the strong case for it, but in reading more about him and his love for the outdoors, he might just be so in love with his surroundings in Vermont that Middlebury feels like a place he can fully realize his future self. Maybe that’s what he means by “I just see myself there.” It’s not the version of him you’ve known for 18 years—it’s his future self he’s imagining.
And the education is top notch, among the very best that SLACs have to offer, so it’s not like he’s choosing a lesser educational option bc of the mountains. And he won’t be the only kid who picks Midd bc of an obsession with the outdoors, so he’ll find some people there who share his passion. There’s no real bad choice here—I’d be inclined to let him pick and hold him to the contributions to make up the price difference. Good luck! Let us know what he decides.
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Avg Jan Low Temps
Poughkeepsie: 15°F
Middlebury: 9°F
Northfield: 5°F
(Information from bestplaces.net)
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I mean, 1/4 of the kids are from top 1% families, so it’s definitely a thing, but may not be visible that much. I know at some schools, wealth is sort of hidden by the kids (I went to a school like this), which is weird in its own way but to my mind, probably better. I did see multiple people saying the MIdd parking lot is full of BMWs and Mercedes etc. Maybe this comment was old.
He won’t be going home except on breaks. Midd has more of these than most schools, so that’s a bit costly. His sister’s travel has been somewhat annoying in a similar way, but she goes to a trimester school, so there are less trips.
“There’s no real bad choice here—I’d be inclined to let him pick and hold him to the contributions to make up the price difference.” –This is actually exactly how I am leaning, too. Thanks for the comments.
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We toured Middlebury twice for both kids and it made it to the top of both of their lists. After touring many reach LAC’s, they tend to blend into each other a bit since they have so much in common. In some ways, “I just see myself there” is a legitimate reason to enroll. It’s also hard for many (otherwise accomplished) kids to articulate their reasons to want to go to a particular school. You can’t go wrong with any of these choices - good luck 
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I’ve looked into it and Midd has significantly more of the ultrawealthy than the other 2. Vassar is the most economically diverse. It’s definitely a thing on paper, but may not be obvious in person.
My husband attended a somewhat similar LAC and was from a similar financial bracket and did experience feeling financially out of place at times. I think it’s a thing, but I admit that my lack of personal experience with the school is a factor here. I will say that I think people who are pretty wealthy sometimes don’t know that they are doing or saying something that feels alienating to other kids. They don’t mean anything by it, but it can feel that way. My kids have experienced this even here.
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