Talking to my parent about EC's

Parents Forum
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<p>How can I approach my mother about joining extracurriculars? I’m not involved in anything right now and I would like to become more active and develop new skills and hobbies. It’s just my mother and it’s tough because money is one thing we need to put into consideration and also transportation. I also feel as if she’ll think it’s unnessecary for me to be doing these activities.
Right now I’ve found a Gym that teaches fencing in our area for $90 a month which is pretty decent considering that cost of many summer programs offered by colleges. </p>

<p>Also, do you all know of any low priced summer programs that would appeal to someone who is interested in math, languages, buisness and possibly science? I already know of NSLI-Y and I’d also like to look into fencing and badminton more. I’m in NC if that helps…</p>

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<p>Are there clubs in your area (perhaps in various other sports) which would be less costly and easier to get to? Or school sports?</p>

<p>Fencing does seem to be a relatively expensive sport.</p>

3

<p>if you have a job, and that job gives you money, then you can do whatever you want with it. why do you need your mother in this at all?</p>

<p>My take on extracurriculars is that if you like it and it’s within reasonable reach, then pursue it. you are old enough to know what you want to do with your time</p>

4

<p>Plenty of kids get into college without participating in expensive extracurriculars. As suggested above, if money in your family is short, get a job, although I’d suggest using at least a part of your earnings to help out with household expenses. A job, by the way, is a perfectly valid extracurricular activity!</p>

<p>The other thing you can do is find a volunteer position with an organization that interests you . . . there are plenty out there that can use the extra help! And volunteering is also a perfectly legitimate extracurricular activity.</p>

<p>If you’re seriously interested in fencing, then pay for it yourself. But if all you want to do is pad your resume for college, then there are many other, much less expensive options.</p>

<p>If you’re telling your mother that she needs to pay for a costly monthly sports club fee plus fancy summer programs just so that you can get into college, than shame on you!</p>

5

<p>I apologize for the misunderstanding, I didn’t mean to come off like that. I have a few more months to go to be eligable in geting a job but what I was asking is how do I approach her in what I want to do not so much how do I ask her for money. Generally, money or no money I feel like she will think I’m waisting my time and I need to be at home rather than out there doing something that she views unproductive.</p>

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<p>There are a lot of free things to join at school I am sure. Check into those first. If she thinks you are being unproductive, have her read these boards for what you need to get into college these days.</p>

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<p>I guess the question I’d need to ask is what she views as productive . . . how does your mother think you should be spending your time?</p>

<p>If, for example, she thinks the most important thing for you to do is school work, put together a chart showing her that your extracurricular won’t take time away from school work. If necessary, offer to spend additional time on school work if you’re permitted to do the extracurricular you want. Show her that not only will your new activity NOT take time away from the things she views as important, but you’ll even put in extra time! That will mean less free time for you . . . but that’s a reasonable sacrifice to make in order to be able to do what you want and keep up with what your mother wants you to do.</p>

<p>I would agree with the above posters, though, that you should also look into what activities you might be able to do through your school. The cost would be less, and the fact that it’s a “school activity” might make it easier for your mother to accept.</p>

8

<p>One advantage of school-based ECs is that you can get help from the teacher-sponsors to explain to your mom why they’re worthwhile–also, most of them will be free.</p>

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<p>Fencing is expensive. Perhaps you could consider something a little less expensive when approaching your mom.</p>

10

<p>Admissions people like to see teens with real jobs… it implies maturity and stability and the ability to deal with the real world…that could be an extracurricular with a lot of fringe benefits for you. In addition, that real world experience with give you a leg up on landing important internships in college…which will have a good payoff come graduation time.</p>

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<p>Channeling my friend, a single mom of 3 boys: “If you have free time, I have plenty for you to do!”</p>

<p>From an EC perspective, if you have significant responsibilities at home, then you need to explain that as part of your college application. Admissions officers know that many kids from families that aren’t well off require their kids to help out either by earning money at a part-time job or by caring for siblings and home while they are out. Both are critically important to the family’s well-being and adcoms know it (and sometimes have come from families like that themselves.)</p>

12

<p>If your mom needs convincing about the value of ECs you could download a copy of the Common Application and tell her you don’t want too many empty boxes.</p>

<p>I agree with most others though, fencing seems pricey, it’s hard to believe there aren’t alternatives in your school that would cost nothing. Jobs, paid and volunteer, will help you much more in the long run.</p>

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<p>One of my kids fences, and it is not that inexpensive. After the initial few months, most clubs make you purchase your own equipment. Competitions are sometimes out of town, too, once you get past the first level of competing. I agree with posters who think you should look into clubs and sports at school. Or start a club if you think your school needs something it doesn’t have! It might be easier to come early or stay late at school than go to fencing at a gym. I have to drive my D to fencing twice a week and pick her up (one evening and one weekend practice), and there is one more night a week she could fence. But I don’t want to drive that often, so she doesn’t always go for the third night.</p>

<p>What about volunteering someplace nearby for an EC? If there is a library, nursing home, hospital, humane society, or food bank, maybe you could do that for a couple of hours a week. That doesn’t cost anything except to get you there and back.</p>

<p>There are some summer programs that give scholarships if you have financial need. You might want to look at the Summer Programs forum on CC for past discussions of this. </p>

<p>NC State has a summer program called “Summer College in Biotechnology & Life Sciences (SCIBLS)”. I am not sure if they have financial aid, but I do remember it was less expensive for in-state students, so you could look into that. Info for 2013 may not be up on the web site yet, but you can see what 2012 was like. </p>

<p>[NCSU</a> CALS Academic Programs -Summer College in Biotechnology and Life Sciences (SCIBLS)](<a href=“http://harvest.cals.ncsu.edu/academic/index.cfm?pageID=1975]NCSU”>http://harvest.cals.ncsu.edu/academic/index.cfm?pageID=1975) </p>

<p>You could also look at the “Earthwatch Student Challenge Awards Program”. </p>

<p>[Student</a> fellowships](<a href=“http://www.earthwatch.org/aboutus/education/studentopp/stufel/]Student”>http://www.earthwatch.org/aboutus/education/studentopp/stufel/)</p>

<p>You would apply next fall (the application due date just passed for this year) for the summer after. Not sure what year you are, so don’t know if this would work for you (if you are a sophomore this year, then you could apply for summer after your junior year). I think those are free (or they were a couple of years ago) if you get accepted. You need a teacher or guidance counselor to nominate you, but if you asked one I bet they would do it.</p>

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<p>I don’t get the money part. Some of the best ECs are free. For example taking a key role at the local the soup kitchen 3 days a week looks a lot more legit than a $5000 two week stint in Guatemala working with Orphans. The first says “chutzpa” the second says “Rich Kid Buying EC”</p>

<p>Other free ECs:
Mowing Senior Citizens Lawns
Shoveling Senior Citizens Snow
Grocery shopping or Handy Man work for an adult home for mentally disabled
Tutoring middle school kids
Reading to daycare kids</p>

<p>You can even make money with an EC - start a small business that makes a a few bucks a week.</p>

15

<p>Thanks for all the responses, I really appreciate it. I guess I was blinded from what my school itself has to offer. I’ll talk to my mother about it before the year ends and use this website as reference. Getting a job in a few months doesn’t seem quite bad either.</p>

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<p>More ECs, some of which could also pay</p>

<p>Help senior citizens with computers (my Mom had her system set up by a teen)
Give or organize a concert at a senior center
Teach something to seniors (my kid taught origami)
Sell something you make (my kid made origami earrings)</p>

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<p>I would not wait until year end… start something now at school. You can join a lot of different activities partway through the year. Not sure what year you are, but the sooner you start, the more likely you are to have put in more hours (volunteering) or maybe having a leadership position in a year or two (club/activity at school). I am not sure what your school offers, but ours has quite a bit of stuff. Things like Quiz Bowl, a creative writing club (which meets over lunch), a robotics club, an Amnesty International group, yearbook or school newspaper (they ALWAYS need extra help at busy times!), things like that.</p>

<p>Maybe look into your options, and pick two things to ask your mom about (maybe one volunteer thing, and one activity at school).</p>

18

<p>Do check into your school activities…all of ours will waive any costs for kids who have a difficult time paying any fees and your school may have the same deal and you’ll make friends that you can probably get rides with. I certainly know that there are many parents in my town that I am grateful to for getting my kids home after school activities because H and I could not easily leave our offices to pick up kids.</p>