<p>There is so much to learn out there in the world apparently…I’ll need to explore You-Tube. (I rarely have time to do anything and am enjoying reading these posts. I had surgery and have two weeks off for “me” recovery time!)</p>
<p>As far as the original poster goes…it seems to me to be an observation of an event that added support to the stereotype that the Asian community has smart and academically talented children whose parents are willing to go push a little harder and to reach out on a limb to find the best opportunities for their children…is not an especially mean or bigoted stereotype…is it? Obviously the original poster has similar values and concerns for her children as she was also there for her academically talented child. Stereotype stories can be hurtful…but I really don’t think this one was especially hurtful.</p>
<p>My brother is married to an Asian (Chinese) woman so their children are basically half of Irish descent and half Chinese. My brother is brilliant and has a PhD. We don’t see them much as they live quite a distance away and I was somewhat surprised to see how pushy my brother was at quizzing his toddler and wanting him to perform. My sister-in-law (Chinese) was quite the opposite…and really wanted my brother to stop! Who knows how smart these children will be but I really believe my brother will be pushing harder than his wife!</p>
<p>Every March 17th many people overindulge in alcohol, get sloppy drunk in celebration of the Irish. Many of them wake up the next day with miserable hangovers and blame the Irish! This has always annoyed me to some extent because the Irish are so brilliant – Newgrange which predates Stonehedge, literature, etc., etc. and I hate to have the major stereotype of my ancestry is that they are alcoholics. From my general observation alcoholism does not discriminate by ethnicity and is a problem for all ethnic groups. I still love the general happiness and festivity of St. Patrick’s Day and just accept that this ridiculous stereotype exists. Sure the Irish drink, as do the English and the German…and perhaps even the Chinese!</p>
<p>…and so back to the original posting in a different light. This was a story about a stereotype of a group that is known for smart children and very involved parents. This is hardly an insulting stereotype from my perspective. Of course all or possibly even most Asians do not fit this stereotype but to condemn a simple observation that struck the observer as amusing is a bit over the top to me.</p>
<p>Zoosermom, If I want to launch a personal attack, i would surely have used “I met my lifelong best friend, the woman whose dog is my daughter’s God-sister”. Perhaps that is more amusing than stereoptying Asian parents about cheating on their children’s age to enrol them into calculus?.</p>
<p>“Zoosermom, If I want to launch a personal attack”</p>
<p>You did launch a personal attack and it stands there for all to see. But that reflects on only you. Not well, I might add. </p>
<p>Have a nice day.</p>
<p>" “I met my lifelong best friend, the woman whose dog is my daughter’s God-sister”"</p>
<p>This is actually a beautiful story about compassion and kindness in the face of spectacular adversity. Which is right up your alley for mocking and attacking, right?</p>
<p>“…several kids were turned away because the parents were trying to sneak in middle school students to register for a program by invitation only for high school students. They were all Asian too. … it became amusing to me because I was thinking of all the things I’ve read on CC”</p>
<p>If you don’t understand attributing the above to Asian parents stereotype is extemely offending then I have nothing more to say either. I ingore overt bigots in this forum. It is the few that are covertly so that send my blood pressure up.</p>
<p>“If you don’t understand attributing the above to Asian parents stereotype is extemely offending then I have nothing more to say either. I ingore overt bigots in this forum. It is the few that are covertly so that send my blood pressure up.”</p>
<p>There was no bigotry there. It would have been bigoted had I said something about all Asians, but I made it very clear that these were a couple of individuals who didn’t represent the group. Miss that part, did you? You were looking for something that wasn’t there and in your quest, you misrepresented posts and crossed a line that shouldn’t have been crossed and you shouldn’t be proud of yourself. You also took a thread that fostered understanding and information and made it ugly. But that’s on you and no one else. I’m now going to step out of this thread, after having been told by two different CC members that I should change my username because of you.</p>
<p>Hey, padad, you should be mad at the Asian parents who did this and reflected badly on other Asians, not at the person who saw it happen. Stereotypes die out when there is no essential truth left to them–thus, for example, Lech Walesa and Pope John Paul I pretty well ended the stereotype of the dumb Polish person (at least, it’s been years since I’ve heard one of those jokes). The stereotype of the intense Asian parent persists because there is still a great deal of truth to it.</p>
<p>Hunt–I’m not getting into this thread’s argument, but I have to ask, are you saying there was a great deal of truth to the dumb Polish person stereotype previous to these counter-examples? (I’m sure you don’t mean that but it does sound like that’s what you are saying.)</p>
<p>Hunt, Those who propagate dumb Polish jokes and think that it took Walesa and John Paul I to dismiss the stereotype have obviously never heard of Copernicus, Marie Curie, Joseph Conrad and Chopin, to list just a few.</p>
<p>Here’s what really funny to me - we are ALL on a college discussion forum. We are ALL very involved in our kid’s academic lives. We are ALL a little obsessed. This nuttiness crosses all cultural and ethnic lines. And we are all doing the best we can. Let’s just ease up on each other.</p>
<p>sorry, i saw the link at the top and had to click :)</p>
<p>this thread is funny. i am asian. the stereotype is true. there are some asian parents who are “like whites” and don’t do these things. it is kind of a circular wild goose chase. asian parents push their kids, admissions/teachers/etc… need to restrict asian %s, asians need to try harder as a result.</p>
<p>all you need to look at is the stats and see asians need ~100 higher SAT that whites to get into the same school, while blacks need ~100 less than whites. there’s nothing you can do about it.</p>
<p>btw you can’t really compare on CC since people on here…are CCers…</p>
<p>As a black person who has read more than a few extremely hurtful and condescending comments here, where people pass judgment upon, and speculate as to “what’s wrong with black people”, I would embrace the “academically intense”, “hardworking” and “ambitious” stereotype with pride. If this is as bad as it gets for you, count yourself lucky!</p>
<p>FWIW, I’ve “known” zoosermom as a fellow forum member for a long time, and I’ve never had reason to accuse her of being racially insensitive or inclined to promulgate stereotypes. Over the years, there have been a lot of threads, started by Asian students, whereby they lament and/or laugh over behaviors exhibited by their “typically Asian parents”. I wouldn’t suggest you ever venture into one of those threads, Padad. You might not survive the experience:rolleyes:</p>
<p>Stereotyping others is usually a defensive behaviour. All said and done, parenting is a huge responsibility.Is it that, since my lifestyle does not permit too much of time for them, I take shield under the notion that it is the kids’ choice if they want to avoid calculus/science?</p>
<p>So reading the tenor of some of the posts here, one gets a feeling that ‘Asian Surge-Neighbors Envy’ syndrome is at work here!</p>
<p>“FWIW, I’ve “known” zoosermom as a fellow forum member for a long time, and I’ve never had reason to accuse her of being racially insensitive or inclined to promulgate stereotypes.”</p>
<p>THank you so much Poetsheart. Really. I just want to be clear that a large part of the reason I posted is because I’ve never seen any example of this stereotype in my life and I have ventured onto those threads by Asian kids and have always thought they were nuts. I guess it was just a way of showing solidarity (hmmmm not solidarity) maybe acknowledgement of the fact that those posters actually may have a point and I was wrong to doubt their own experience.</p>
<p>No, I certainly didn’t mean to suggest that Poles were dumb, but the stereotype probably grew out of some reality, perhaps that some particular wave of Polish immigrants weren’t educated, or spoke English poorly. But perhaps some of you are too young to remember that all the dumb blonde jokes were formerly “Polack” jokes. My point was just that stereotypes that have no truth to them eventually shrivel up, especially if there is no longer any reason for animus toward the group involved. And while Copernicus and Marie Curie were smart, I still think it took Walesa and John Paul to bury the Polack joke.
Note: If you polled Americans who had even heard of Marie Curie, what nationality do you think most of them would say she was?</p>
What are you refering to when you say “too much of time for them?” Do you mean kids? Are you saying that many busy parents don’t take enough time with their kids, and that is why their kids avoid calculus or science? And what do you mean by “avoid?” Most every kid I know takes a year of calculus and a year of physics as part of a broad based curriculum. Do you believe that a child has no choice in what area of study he can pursue, and would only choose humanities or business because his parents didn’t spend time with him?</p>
<p>So is the implication that American (whatever that means anymore) parents spend less time with their kids than Asian parents, and that’s why they don’t do as well academically as Asian kids? I have to say that where I live, many more American mothers are stay-at-home moms than Asian mothers. So to the extent that staying at home means spending more time with the kids (sometimes it doesn’t, I know), I wouldn’t agree with that premise at all. Because Asians are so strong in math and science, they are in great demand in the workforce and have good jobs outside the home.</p>
<p>I think that American parents show their equally pushy side in the world of youth sports.</p>
<p>Poetsheart, I presume that you, from your username, would pay more closely to meaning underlying the usage of words. I object to the wording of “several parents were trying to sneak in”. I don’t really quite understand how the OP was able to tell this, unless the OP was standing next to all the “several parents” and heard the exchange. Imagine that there is a line. How could the OP be standing so close to all the “several” incidents to come to the conclusion that all these parents tried to “sneak” their children in. Yes, there could be kids being turned away. It could be that they didn’t understand that exceptions to the age rule could not be granted, they could have waited in the wrong line, they may not have understood the rule on age requirement, etc. None of these scenarios involved “sneaking”.</p>
<p>" don’t really quite understand how the OP was able to tell this, unless the OP was standing next to all the “several parents” and heard the exchange"</p>
<p>I made it clear that I WAS STANDING NEXT TO THE PEOPLE in the same room for a long time. There was no speculation there, so stop projecting. I heard what happened because it happened inches away from me and I couldn’t miss it if I wanted to. Jeez what is wrong with you? There was no wrong line, there was one line. The application papers that everyone had to have filled out said HIGH SCHOOL STUDENTS. I know that because I had one of those in my hand. Keep your imagination to yourself but don’t create scenarios to fit MY facts. The couple of parents at issue knew the rules but were determined that the rules applied to everyone but themselves. They did not represent the rest of the group of Asian parents or Staten Island parents, but they were jerks and caused delays for everyone else. I deeply and profoundly resent the way you are twisting my words to fit your imagined scenarios.</p>