<p>I like how almost every post in the last two weeks in the Watering Hole are somehow related to Rocker’s Canadianism, which is a real word.</p>
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<p>Like the sea or the prince? Or both?</p>
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<p>What can I say, my influence is spreading.</p>
<p>Okay, my education is really confusing when it comes to languages. Basically, I learned Croatian first because I was born in Croatia, then my family moved to Canada and I learned English and forgot Croatian. Then, my mom wanted me to learn Croatian, so whenever I’d speak in English to her, she’d be like “Sorry, I don’t speak English” and that forced me to speak Croatian. Then, I was put into a program called French Immersion in elementary school, which is basically just regular school with half of your classes in French. Then, in grade 6, my teacher told me that I was qualified to attend a French-language school, so I applied and got in, and that’s where I’ve been since grade 7.</p>
<p>Now, I understand your reasoning, because a number of my friends at my current school have trouble with English. They obviously speak it perfectly, because living in a city where English is the first language is obviously a greater influence than just attending a foreign-language school. However, they make many mistakes when they write that would be normal if they were in elementary school (“did you see that women over their?”). Yeah. So the reason I’m good at English is because I went to a regular English school with some French classes in elementary school, and because languages are one of my strong points, and because I read a lot in English.</p>
<p>You have to stop saying things that require me to write essays.</p>
<p>I love essays.</p>
<p>And “Did you see that women over their” isn’t common to just Canadians. American kids do that ALL THE TIME. It’s really ridiculous. There should be some system of hard knocks to teach kids how to spell.</p>
<p>I’m glad I don’t speak like my parents, especially my mom. She uses this really awkward Midwestern folksy dialect that makes her sound really uneducated. She doesn’t use it all the time, but it depends on the other people in the conversation. For instance, she might say, “I ain’ gon’ pay fur no more of these.” It’s annoying, since I’m the type of person that abuses verbosity to the tenth degree.</p>
<p>You’re… not a real… Canadian?</p>
<p>Everything I know is a lie.</p>
<p>No, I am. I have a real citizenship card and passport. I have all the documentation. I would show you, but you’re an American who will try to steal my identity, so. A citizenship card is one of the single most important pieces of ID a Canadian can possess, you know. Not to be taken lightly. Though I do have an embarrassing 5-year-old picture of myself from my citizenship card on my computer, and that can’t really be used for anything, but it was scanned for a specific purpose, which didn’t include showing you silly Americans.</p>
<p>And Caspian like both.</p>
<p>Canada is so fascinating.</p>
<p>Maybe so.</p>
<p>Goodnight, Americans.</p>
<p>Thomas Hardy needed an editor.</p>
<p>Your face needs an editor lololol</p>
<p>So I was almost killed at lunch today.</p>
<p>^That’s nice, snoop. You should tell Dr. Phil about it.</p>
<p>For you silly Canadians, that’s a dude on American TV with a southern accent that tells people that they’re messed up. It’s great fun.</p>
<p>I had my first newspaper assignment today. I got to go take pictures of the most riveting junior high soccer game ever. In the forty-five minutes while I was there, no goals were scored. It wouldn’t be so bad if the goalies had the ball more than about three times. I just…love…sports. Yummy.</p>
<p>I have to go to school at 11 on Tuesday for a about an hour to get my schedule and then I get to leave. Yeah. We’re so chill in the Canada.</p>
<p>There are things yummier than sports, JB.</p>
<p>And I know who Dr. Phil is.</p>
<p>And I’m exhausted and I’m going to die.</p>
<p>The Canada? The Canada? No.</p>
<p>I’m mad beyond explanation right now, but I hide it well.</p>
<p>I think it should be like an island group. The Canadines. It’s genius.</p>
<p>I hate sports. That was sarcasm. When I achieve world domination, I will ban sports, especially soccer. It will be replaced with Euchre. For all of you who don’t live in Ohio, euchre is a card game that all Ohioans play.</p>
<p>It isn’t a terribly good idea to make me madder right now.</p>
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I had to. It was calling me.</p>
<p>Ummm…Is there something wrong with that? It looks fine to me, except that poster ended a phrase with “upon,” and it’s somewhat of a run-on sentence.</p>
<p>Bolding escapes you.</p>
<p>Wow, I must be slow tonight. Now it makes 50% sense.</p>
<p>I’m having an off day.</p>
<p>And you should all appreciate The Canada because we provide the world with good music. So, yeah. Without us, you wouldn’t have The New Pornographers or Tokyo Police Club or any of that jazz. So.</p>
<p>OR FEIST. omgomgomg</p>
<p>I’m not a fan of Tokyo Police Club. Not a fan.</p>