<p>My birthday is 5 months away.</p>
<p>Are all Canadians this self-infatuated? I think they are.</p>
<p>Who isn’t self-infatuated, really?</p>
<p>I got in a fight with vector calculus today and lost.</p>
<p>My calculus class has got to be the least productive in all the United States. I’ve been in school now since 23 August, and we just started talking about limits on Monday. That’s the second chapter in the book, after covering six sections in the first chapter. My teacher also lets us use our textbooks, notes, and answer keys on quizzes and tests. The answer keys are detailed solutions to all the homework problems that outline all the steps to solve them. And since my book is screwy, we can’t do anything without calculators. The book’s problems were written in such a way that it’s impossible to do them without a calculator.</p>
<p>That sounds exactly like my calculus class, jb, so not the least productive.</p>
<p>Knowing what a dangling participle is will raise someone’s SAT writing score by 100 points. Seriously.</p>
<p>I have no idea what a dangling particle is and I got a 740 in writing. </p>
<p>My calc teacher gives no partial credit. I got an 85 because of one negative sign and one mislabeled graph. I could say I’m furious, but really I’m just mildly annoyed.</p>
<p>An informed Canadian on Canadian television just said that when America sneezes, the whole world catches a cold.</p>
<p>I saw a most wonderful piece about Canada on YouTube. Well, first I saw “Fifty Things I Love About Canada,” performed by an extremely soft-spoken middle-aged woman in front of her computer screen in a dark room. Then I saw “The Truth About Canada,” a rant about how Canada is so evil for the Residence School apartheid spiel on the west coast. The girl was wearing an American Eagle shirt as she proclaimed her hatred for Canada, a cruel country.</p>
<p>You’re all so into Canada. None of my constituents care very much for the US of A.</p>
<p>I like those puffy sticker things.</p>
<p>I absolutely hate writing mu.</p>
<p>I would respond if I knew what that was.</p>
<p>Ballpoint pens that make that sticky noise when you pick it up off the paper are the best.</p>
<p>Mu: μ.</p>
<p>Liquid ink pens are the best.</p>
<p>As long as they’re thin.</p>
<p>Look at us, talking about pens. Good night, yak.</p>
<p>Snoop, that’s what you get for not taking Physics.</p>
<p>Americans are just fascinated by Canada. It’s so much like the US, yet it’s so different. You have French people, and everyone plays hockey. And no one cares about Canada. You don’t see Palestinians burning the Canadian flag.</p>
<p>This is how much I’m fascinated by Canada, I–I(That’s me holding my fingers very close together).</p>
<p>I have late arrival tomorrow, ha haha hahaha.</p>
<p>I’m being initiated into my sorority tonight, gang.</p>
<p>Have fun being paddled, or whatever they do for sororities.</p>
<p>That’s right, Jolie ran off to become a sorority girl.</p>