<p>Okay, I know the holidays are wonderful. Friends, family, figgy pudding etc., but I am guessing that I am not the only one who has moments when I just can’t wait until January 2. Maybe this thread will help. Come here to vent when you are overwhelmed, frustrated, angry or just can’t eat another sugar cookie without feeling like you are going to lose your lunch!</p>
<p>Maybe if we have a non-judgemental place to unload, we will come closer to that ideal holiday that we all long for.</p>
<p>I’ll start!!!</p>
<p>Why would a manufacturer make “PRE-LIT” garland with cheap quality lights and yet attach them to the garland with a series of complex knots, clips and twist ties. After one year of use, the lights are dead, my fingers are bleeding from removing the lights and my porch still looks like it’s Halloween.</p>
<p>EPTR-Wow, be careful with those fingers! I always wondered how long pre-lit trees and garland lasted. </p>
<p>My holiday approach has devolved over the years from Martha perfection to a combination of procrastination and joy. Embrace the beauty, reduce the masochism (no need to cook everything from scratch…use Sam’s club for some appetizers and enhance them with pretty candlelight.) I’ve learned to love last minute shopping, and the sales are even better.</p>
<p>I’m with you on that, Fauve. Martha Stewart would be horrified that I even USE artificial garland but I let that stuff go a long time ago. But anyway, another pet peeve…</p>
<p>After carefully packing all of the holiday decorations last year, I discover that they had not been returned to their proper storage space by my husband and now we have no idea where the stockings and tree skirt are. Oh no, wait. One of the stockings is in a stack of old clothes in the playroom. Just one. That makes sense.</p>
<p>We have two Christmas trees - one in the family room and one in the living room. The family room tree looks great. The other tree remains undecorated one week later - looks like we’re growing a pine tree in our living room.</p>
<p>This thread makes me think of the brilliant rant Lois Griffin does in the “Family Guy” Christmas episode, when she just can’t take it anymore. :)</p>
<p>Christmas is OK - dare I say ahead of schedule - with me. </p>
<p>It’s my job that is imploding. Everyday I have to tell myself I’m lucky to be employed. But it helps very little when I can’t sleep at night or come “this close” to a tearful meltdown more days than not. I’ve been with this company for 23 years. I’m a manager with staff counting on me. It’s NEVER been this out of control and unreasonable.</p>
<p>Exactly!!! Where are the rest of the honest people. It’s okay, the Christmas Police won’t catch up with you if you tell us how you really feel (or feel every now and then, at least!)</p>
<p>I too am way behind on shopping. I just keep thinking not one of us really needs anything and even the kids want very little, so I keep putting it off. Is it time to let Christmas of the past go? I asked the kids at Thanksgiving what they thought of bagging Christmas next year and going to Ireland or something. My S, 21 was enthusiastic, my D, 18, quiet. So maybe it is not yet time. </p>
<p>I did make cookies today, the press cookies with red and green sprinkles that shout Christmas, one batch to ship to S, and one for us.</p>
<p>I’ll admit it – I don’t like Christmas! I’m perfectly happy with people putting up lights, decorating the tree, baking cookies, adoring Christ, singing carols, and all of that, but I just <em>hate</em> all the gift stuff!</p>
<p>Nobody on my gift list really needs anything, so why do we all have to go out and buy stuff that no-one likes and spend time and paper wrapping it up and shipping it around the country? What a phenomenal waste of money, time, and energy. </p>
<p>I would love to take all the money that my family spends on gifts every year and donate it to a worthy charity! Or, failing that, use it to fund a family reunion or some kind of get-together that we’d actually enjoy. (I suggest this periodically, but everyone always looks at me as though I’m speaking Martian.)</p>
<p>Call me Scrooge, but every year I dread this gift-mania. Thank you, EPTR for giving me the chance to vent – and Merry Christmas! :-)</p>
<p>Glad to be of service KDmom. Don’t you feel better already?</p>
<p>Okay, another pet peeve. Why do I alway feel like I am doing well with the shopping as I serenely drift toward Dec. 25 and then, around the 22nd, I start panicking and buying stupid random items. On Christmas morning, i look at the loot and realize that I should have stopped buying before the panic began and I’ll do better next year and won’t allow myself to get carried away. But no, every year it’s the same thing.</p>
<p>OK, I’ll bite! Having trouble with gifts this year, the kids are 16 and 19, they don’t particularly NEED anything, and they don’t particularly WANT anything (with 1 or 2 exceptions). Ever since I can remember DH has been hell-bent on creating that “WOW” moment for them when they see the tree/stuff on xmas morning. When they were little, it was awesome. But as they get older, the boxes get smaller, and more expensive. WHY do we keep on doing this? WHEN do we scale WAY back and enjoy the day for what it is?</p>
<p>This year, my mom (who lives nearby) will be going away to spend Christmas with my brother and his family. They have younger kids and are still in that “magic” phase. How do I make the day “special” for just our family unit? How do I keep it from being JUST ANOTHER DAY. sigh…I have to say - I LOVE the Christmas season, it’s the DAY that I am apprehensive about. Probably makes no sense, but I’m feeling the catharsis…</p>
<p>kdmom, today I made a list of charities that match the interests of each niece and nephew (ages 12 to 25, in two families). I’ll make a small gift to each one. One family’s kids will get it; the others will feel deprived. Too bad. I feel good about it. And no more shopping.</p>
<p>We had a year like Queen Elizabeth’s some years ago–an annus horribilis. I’d just like it to be over without something else awful happening. My idea of Christmas would be to hunker down in my bathrobe all day eating my grandmother’s cinnamon buns, listening to nice music, reading the books we give each other, and just doing nothing–like I did when I was a kid.</p>
<p>Here’s my Christmas rant: I want that old, low-key Christmas back. It’s been four and a half years since my mom had a disabling stroke, and I’ve finally decided to Just Say No to the idea that we pick her up from the nursing home, drive an hour plus to my brother’s house, spend three or four hours there with about 25 people (all SIL’s family, ours is scattered), drive her back, and drive home. We did that at TG, and we’ve done it every year for the past four Thanksgivings and Christmases. She has dementia, and she’s very frail; stimulation is good, but this is too much. We’ll take a festive brunch and presents to my mom at the nursing home, spend some time there, and then come back home–and maybe I’ll change back into my bathrobe. Better for her, better for me. Some of the out-of-town siblings will think this is sad, but that’s tough. End of rant. Thanks for the cathartic moment.</p>
<p>I started out with the mind set that I was REALLY going to cut back. It just frustrates me how quickly it all adds up. At what point do I stop getting gifts/gift cards for the teenage cousins?</p>
<p>Geezermom - good for you! As for the siblings…give them the toll free number of the nearest car rental.</p>
<p>We are Agnostic, one grown-kid will be here, one in foreign parts. No tree (I’m lazy), but, by golly, we are going to make our usual GINGERBREAD HOUSES, and trim the hell out of them!!!That’s one tradition that stuck. It’s sad, I know, not to do the other stuff, but we just are not in the spirit for it. We’re waiting for that first grandchild (hurry, Santa!) to rekindle the xmas spirit!!! (edit: kids are not pregnant - we’re just hoping that one will get that way within the next 5 or 6 years!)</p>
<p>a few years ago at our family christmas, my nieces and nephews with young families bought presents for my boys. i felt that was just a waste of their hard-earned money. it took some convincing, but we now do a white elephant exchange. the monetary amount is really, really low, but we have so much fun with it. there is always something really funny that everyone wants, so the fun of “taking” the present away or opening another really becomes entertaining. no gift buying pressure…just some fun gifts and we all have a blast without spending a small fortune.</p>
<p>Wonderful thread! I was just thinking in the car today that I have a love/hate relationship with Christmas. I agree with many on here who feel the gift giving aspect is excessive, but of course, when I try to trim that back with dh’s family it never works. </p>
<p>I hate to be so cliche, but it all comes down to the mother-in-law for me. She’s just demanding and unrealistic and self-involved. She doesn’t like giving gift cards or cash to the kids, because SHE likes to shop. SHE likes to hand them a present. The thing is, she’s really bad at it. One year she asked me if my ds would like their Notre Dame rug.It had been on the floor of their den for about 20 years. When he was little, he had liked Notre Dame, but what freshman in high school wants the rug of a college they’re not even applying to? I said I did not think he’d like it. She gave it to him anyway. I would’ve warned him, but I thought she’d listen when I said he wouldn’t like it. The look on his face was pure shock. When we left he said,“I can’t believe I got a rug.” </p>
<p>I could go on and on about this, and in fact I did that last year at this time, but I won’t bore you all. I will say that I’m calmer about it this year, because as Oprah says, when you say yes to something you don’t want to do, you’re saying no to yourself. I’m saying yes to myself this year. As for my mother-in-law? Well, one of us is going to be unhappy, and it’s not going to be me. We’re ditching the extended family Christmas for a second year, and we’re going to have a precious bit of family time with ds home from college and husband home from work travel. </p>
<p>And next year, I look forward to quitting the family gift exchanges… I mean, the oldest grandchild is 24 for Pete’s sake! Do we wait until she’s married to stop? It’s silly.</p>
<p>Lights on the house -check (we never take them down, actually - they are rope lights and are hardly noticeable when not lit; every December, H connects them with power cords and voila - our house is bright and festive!)
Gift shopping - check (almost; just need to order a few more things - we don’t go overboard in this department since we are all adults now; we did “adopt a family” at work, and it was fun shopping for the little kiddos).
Tree - check (it grew to the prefect size this year, and the next year’s tree is coming up nicely. When DD gets here for her winter break, we will cut it down and decorate with my cat&dog ornaments, but I have to think about putting the Radko ones on the tree, because one of our cats has never seen a Christmas tree).
Decorating - check (I spend minimal time here; snowflake towels in the powder room, poinsettia rugs in the kitchen, fresh carnations in the vases on every table, and icicle lights on the stairs and above the fireplace. Definitely no Martha Stewarts here).
Food and wine - check (the freezer is loaded with goodies, the wine shelf is stocked. We will make steaks and salads for Christmas, and DD will help out with the New Year’s dumplings).
Company holiday party - check (the place was good, the food was top-notch, only a few meateaters whined about the appetizers, H and I got to sit at the table with no VPs, and my LBD from Saks was stellar).</p>
<p>And kudos to WA State for opening the Holiday Spirits store at the mall. That made in Oregon cranberry liqueur is delicious. Did someone mention stress?</p>
You go, Helenback! We’ve been evolving into a more manageable Christmas ever since I decided that I didn’t want to spend 3 weeks creating a Christmas for husband and kids in our home, then use Christmas afternoon to pack up for a week-long trip the next day to visit grandparents, aunts/uncles, and every living relative 300 miles away. It just hit me one year as I was roasting a turkey, cleaning up the gift-opening mess, and trying to cram a million gifts into the car that I didn’t want to do it anymore. (That Oprah is one smart lady.) Ever since I’ve concentrated our holiday efforts on the people who actually live in our house, I’ve been able to enjoy them more - the holidays and the people who live in our house.</p>
<p>Another thing that’s helped is farming a lot of holiday chores out to the kids. Our oldest d won’t be home for Christmas (for the first time ever ), so when she was here for Thanksgiving she and her sisters decorated the house. Big relief not to have that nagging at me. This year might work out all right if I can force myself to stay on track this week. Of course I’ve left all the things I find the most difficult to do for last, and it would probably help if I wasn’t typing this post instead of being more productive …</p>
I just can’t get into it this year.</p>
It’s okay, the Christmas Police won’t catch up with you if you tell us how you really feel (or feel every now and then, at least!)</p>