<p>The extroverter, open, non intuitive mom!
We are hitting an all time low… </p>
<p>His new idea is that we are only allowed to talk if there is matter of life or death. Even then I should only use a word or two… ha ha ha</p>
<p>Anyone else with similar experience?</p>
<p>Just asked my introverted daughter, she says use written notes, emails, and texts. 
She actually is not kidding…</p>
<p>Text, text, text!</p>
<p>Been there, done that, with DS in HS.
Heard that it is very common with young men…and usually changes with time.
(doesn’t everything?)
Our DS is still busy, self absorbed and quiet, though at 26 he will come up with some startling ‘I love you’ s once in a while.</p>
<p>DD on the other hand could use some lessons in introversion (is that a word?).
Weird to have two children so polar opposite in this respect.</p>
<p>best of luck! You are not alone.</p>
<p>Yes, that would be me and my son. Just about drove me crazy senior year. Many stress filled days in our house. We both survived, and he just arrived home from his first year of college. Still not an extrovert, but he is interested in some things other than computer games. While I’m on a roll, let me share that he has his first job interview EVER tomorrow.
Next week the novelt will probably have worn off, but I’m celebrating the small successes.</p>
<p>Oh, I forgot the “independent” from the title…</p>
<p>The only thing that worked so far is that he has some very talkative friends. </p>
<p>I am going to cling to the hope that when he becomes an adult he will find it in his heart to tolerate me… Perhaps we will have some nice Thanksgiving dinners when he knows it is only for one day… Hey, I can only hope.</p>
<p>When it comes to school he is actually very active and involved. I guess that makes him even more desperate to be “let alone” at home.</p>
<p>I do not know, I was always thought that I would be having all those great discussion with my son and he resists them like the plague…</p>
<p>1214mom, I can not even think of senior year, or end of junior year either…</p>
<p>I bribe my sons with food. They open up at their favorite pizza place.</p>
<p>
</p>
<p>My D is willing to tutor on this subject. :)</p>
<p>I did this to my parents in my Junior year at HS. I was awful to them. I just honestly had nothing to say to them. They were thrilled that I graduated early, heading off to college my Senior year.</p>
<p>We still laugh about it (thank God).</p>
<p>My S was the same way. I’m on the introverted side so I can appreciate his style. I realized long ago that being with his outgoing friends and being busy at school was exhausting for him and home was the place he needed to recharge. We were his safe zone.</p>
<p>You are definitely not alone, I have 2 of those…I second oldmom’s “text, text,text”.
Before they started driving, the car was the best place for meaningful conversation…
Thank you rom828, that is something I had not considered and I suspect is very true.</p>
<p>If he is serious that conversation should be limited to life or death situations I think that merits psychological evaluation. I don’t think that’s okay in a family. Has he reached this conclusion after a lot of strife within the family? He may have his reasons for not wanting to talk with you but I wouldn’t just put it on being quiet or introverted.</p>
<p>^your point is a very good one if OP literally meant “matter of life or death”… I did not take it literally but maybe OP could clarify if she meant it literally</p>
<p>am, just let him come to you. It drives me crazy when people ask questions all the time… oh, and text, text, text…</p>
<p>I was exaggerating a bit to show how much different we are in personality.</p>
<p>I also come from a southern country of extreme socialization while apparently my son got all his genes from my northwestern husband…</p>
<p>My sons are 22 and 24. They still don’t talk much and don’t appreciate too much talk or too many questions. Just last night I was appreciating the fact that at least they now compose full sentences rather than the multi-syllabic (on a good day) grunts during the middle years of HS.</p>
<p>My answer is for them to get a really outgoing gf. S1’s is great. I text them, maybe get a “y” or “n” back. Her, I get multi-part ongoing text conversation for 10 minutes. Ahhh, so nice :)</p>
<p>ha ha ha </p>
<p>My son’s gf right now is an ultra nerd INTJ, so zero luck. </p>
<p>Food does not work with him but rides do. Actually, I had a complete melt the other day when DH offered a ride and son said oh, I d prefer if my mom drives me. Wow!!! Can not describe the feeling!</p>
<p>I walk with mine, or shoot baskets (we play Horse, or sometimes Capybara, or another odd animal). I’ve made it about me – I need the exercise – and I try to not talk. At all. A companionable silence. Over time, he decided it wasn’t an evil plan to talk to him and is less cranky about it. Sometimes he even offers up a conversation. </p>
<p>It’s not personal. He doesn’t hate you. It sure feels like it, though!! I have sat through entire meals, whole car rides, with my guys and NOBODY talks. Yeesh. (We don’t allow cell phones at the table, or for the entire duration of a car ride. Introverts especially need to practice making small talk, it’s a handy life-skill)</p>
<p>^^^^^
small talk: in his english class this year they had to write a poem and his poem’s title was “the curse of the small talk”. For the record, he got a very good grade on it.</p>
<p>Jokes apart, at times I feel paranoid that things are happening and I am the last one to find out.</p>