@abasket , great tip! Years ago, when I was working with a youth program, I would ask more ambiguous questions, like “do you have anything exciting coming up?” or “what are you up to these days?” to give some space to those who might feel less thrilled about their plans (especially the non-college bound). It sort of overflowed to asking adults as well. My own little rebellion against letting your job define you!
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I really like that. I’m going to try it!
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The other thought is :
“I used to work in _______ (education, finance, whatever), now I spend my time _________ (gardening, volunteering)
Doesn’t matter if your job experience was 2 years ago or 20 or 30 years ago.
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I’ve heard some people suggest instead of “what do you do for a living” or “what do you do,” a better question is “what do you do for fun?”
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20 posts were split to a new thread: Things That Annoy Me!
It’s funny—H & I thank each other when one if us pays the bill. When we treat others, the other couple generally thanks both of us. If one of us is away from the table and misses the thanks, we just assume everyone is happy and good. I guess since H & I merge our finances and tend to agree about almost everything we spend on, we have never had this issue be something we particularly notice.
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I’m Bay Area… not much different to NYC from a COL perspective.
This is @conmama’s thread.
I’ve probably been so long-winded in it you thought it was mine! 
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Oh, I love it. I’m just thinking how funny it would be if my husband asked, “So, what’s the latest in the CC thread about thanking people when picking up the check?” (Because I told him about it). And then I replied, “How much poll workers are paid.”
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H is a check grabber. He also loves theatre and concerts, and buys tickets in fours to share with our friends. It isn’t a financial issue for us, but most of our friends are in the same situation and it does get awkward. He’s finally accepted letting friends pick up the dinner or happy hour tab before the show.
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I’ve started asking people “what keeps you busy?”
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I sometimes ask, “What do you do to stay out of trouble?”
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When I get asked that, I usually say “I don’t stay out of trouble!”
My husband is retired. I have a part-time job. When asked he always says we are retired. No, not me!
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I retired from my career in finance decades ago; DH is now doing part time consulting. When some one asks what I do with all my free time I shamelessly say, “as little as possible”.
I no longer have anything to prove to anyone; especially myself 
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I say “whatever I want to” and feel no guilt.
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Holding a knock down drag out on my front lawn (well, not “mine” literally") but my taxes pay for it! I wonder if admission will bring in BBB revenue?