<p>These parents definitely weren’t going to tolerate their son’s grades anymore. I wonder how their son will do after this:</p>
<p>[Chesapeake</a> parents take stand over teen’s grades | HamptonRoads.com | PilotOnline.com](<a href=“The Virginian-Pilot - Virginia News, Sports, Weather, Business & Things to Do”>The Virginian-Pilot - Virginia News, Sports, Weather, Business & Things to Do)</p>
<p>I don’t think that public humiliation is an appropriate disciplinary technique for most kids. For some personality types, it might work. But I think that for most kids, it would either generate extreme hostility toward the parent or be viewed with indifference – depending on the style of kid.</p>
<p>There has to be a better way.</p>
<p>You mentioned the most important points. “MOST KIDS” and “DEPENDING ON THE STYLE OF THE KID”. Well maybe, just maybe, the parents were EXACTLY right with their punishment/motivation for their child. Maybe for this kid it was exactly what he needed. To think there is only 1 way to raise a kid; or that there are some methods that shouldn’t be used on ANY kid; is wrong. Each child is different and needs to be raised differently.</p>
<p>I wonder whether the kid has attention and organization problems. The article says that he did not turn in homework his parents had overseen him doing. Nephew (now a college sophomore) had ADD and borderline Asperger’s. He often failed to turn in homework, forgot it at home, etc…</p>
<p>“Public humiliation of this nature should investigated by Child Protective Services.”</p>
<p>This comment was posted in reaction to the above article. Unbelievable.</p>
<p>Sounds like child abuse. I wonder how they made him to stay there? Why did he stay and did not leave? The child does not have any self respect anymore, probably has been treated in similar fashion in his entire life, which would explain his bad grades, since he does not think of himself as deserving anythink good.</p>
<p>It has happened before - I heard about it on the news a while ago. And it has apparently done wonders for the child in question.
Agree - it is not for all ;)</p>
<p>What do you mean “it has apparently done wonders”? Then why does it keep happening? Perhaps the child does try or at least wants to try initially but if there is a LD or other neurological condition involved, this might prevent him from succeeding, on his own, without other kind of intervention. I hope they HAVE ruled out any LDs because otherwise it sure sounds like abuse…or negligence.</p>
<p>“Sounds like child abuse. I wonder how they made him to stay there? Why did he stay and did not leave? The child does not have any self respect anymore, probably has been treated in similar fashion in his entire life, which would explain his bad grades, since he does not think of himself as deserving anythink good.”</p>
<p>I am assuming you are just being facetious? There’s no proof that this is “Child Abuse”. Maybe the kid stayed there because deep down he knew he screwed up, and he respects his parents. And again, no proof that he has no self respect or thinks himself undeserving. Again, I’m sure you were just being facetious. Not knowing the “Whole Story” makes it impossible to give an educated opinion negatively.</p>
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<p>In the first case I have heard about. The boy’s grades and school attendance improved greately. I will try to dig out the article.</p>
<p>The picture in the article shows two of his grades as an “E”. What the heck is an E?</p>
<p>For me, this boils down to using shaming as punishment. Has shaming gone the way of scarlet letters and public stockades or should we bring it back? Is there some value to the uncomfortable feeling of knowing you’ve screwed up? Is shame best experienced publicly or privately?</p>
<p>I know when I was younger; about 8 years old; I shoplifted some candy from the local supermarket. My parents saw me with the candy at home and knew I stole it. I confessed. They walked me back to the supermarket. Made me give the candy back. ALSO, made me pay for it. Then they had the manager of the store make me make an announcement on the store’s PA system where I had to tell everyone in the store that I shoplifted; that I was sorry; and that I wouldn’t do it again. Well; it’s been 40 years later and I NEVER shoplifted again.</p>
<p>My kids would normally try to please me by doing what I ask. I am having a hard time wrapping my mind around publicly humiliating a child. I think it is sad when parents have to resort to that.</p>
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<p>I believe an “E” is the same as an “F”.</p>
<p>But in your case afadad, it could be argued that the punishment fit the crime - ie taking responsibility for one’s action to the store that was wronged (and was somewhat anonymous/not so public if done over a PA system). How is that even accomplished here by making the kid stand on a street corner? Did he do something wrong to these people who will see him? Will this lead to teasing and bullying or social ostracizing by other kids, not because of the bad grades but solely because of his having to wear a posterboard? Certainly he is being used to set an example for OTHER students (as the comment by the dad in the car illustrates). And in your case afadad, the store had a motive for using you to set an example to deter shoplifting by others (and probably cared more about that than about you). But is it really the parents’ responsibility here to make sure that their own children must set an example for the academic performance of other children? (although the dad IS a pastor so perhaps they feel it is)</p>
<p>It’s hard to judge, because we don’t know what else the parents tried that didn’t work. Did they try having their son evaluated for depression or for a learning disability? Did they try normal disciplinary tactics, like withhold privileges? Have they tried working with the school? Did they consider sending him to a different school?
Or are the parents a couple of kooks?</p>
<p>This makes me cringe, but I don’t know enough about any of the parties involved to pass judgment.</p>
<p>In the tough love category, I had a co-worker who took her two sons to the local juvenile detention center for a scared-straight experience. I can’t recall whether she had them spend the night or not, but she was a divorced mom raising two black sons and she wanted to impress on them that this is where many black men in society end up. I wouldn’t have gone that route, but I know she loved her kids and was doing what she thought was the right thing.</p>
<p>I can’t imagine this technique being effective long term. Actually, I believe it may make the child’s performance worse. People, expecially teen boys, tend to live up to the “reputation” or expectation of who they are. Announcing to all that he is a failure is more likely to reinforce other’s perception of him as a failure (as well as his own) and therefore more likely to contribute to future failure.</p>
<p>If my child were failing several classes, I would be probably yank the child out of the school and home school and work with him until he was able to succeed in a school enviroment.</p>
<p>In my kids school, E is Exempt. Student is enrolled but need not complete the class work for some reason.</p>