Looking at your list posted below - so you have need?
If not, you have UCONN, RPI, and Purdue. Three great ones. Your list can end there - a safety, likely, and low reach.
Some of the others meet need. So if you have need-great. If not, don’t apply to but rather find subs:
UMD (need Banneker Key), UIUC, Va Tech.
If you want great schools to meet budget - especially great for aero start with UAH which is surrounded by defense companies. Strong outcomes. Bigger - Bama, Mississippi State, Kansas, Missouri Science & Tech, Texas Tech. They crush your budget. U of AZ is outstanding aero and meets your budget. Iowa State another. Buffalo too. Florida and UMN too make budget as does FSU which will best budget but like Michigan engineering is not on main campus.
These schools are loaded with kids like you- they go for the dough or other reasons.
One of my co workers kids went to W Michigan over Michigan. $$. Works at Pratt & Whitney. Was Hartford. Got a big promotion to Utah.
If the economy is good, you’ll be fine. Or if there’s war. CS a bit tougher potentially with AI.
In the end it’s Finance 101 - don’t spend more than you can afford to. I get you’d love the big name but in your family’s case, if they can’t afford it the big name is a nightmare.
You shouldn’t be asking aboit EA vs RD (go EA). You should be asking yourself - what was I thinking (even visiting - although you may not have known costs or budget at that time) ?
Good luck
Reach/Match:
MIT
CMU
Cornell
Georgia Tech
Purdue
Northeastern
UMD
CWRU
Virginia Tech
UIUC
UMass Amherst
Safety:
UConn
Rutgers
RPI (Rensellaer Medalist)