<p>My daughter was wait listed at Groton, which is her First Choice school. Is it appropriate for me to call the school to ask the following question: if she is eventually invited to attend, will she receive financial aid? </p>
<p>We can simply not afford anything close to the tuition amount, so if candidates called from the wait list are not eligible for financial aid, we will need to withdraw.<br>
Do you think the school will answer me frankly? </p>
<p>Also, are any other parents w children on wait lists frustrated that they were not invited for revisit day? There is a lot of talk about ‘fit’ and truly, I don’t know how a young person could get a true feel of how they fit at a prospective school by only the 45 minute tour! I guess you are expected to just jump! If you are lucky enough to be one of the very very few called off the wait list. </p>
<p>On a separate note, she was accepted at three other great schools and was given very generous financial aid at two of them, so we are revisiting those schools with excitement!</p>
<p>As a single mother of an only child, I really would appreciate any suggestions from parents who may have been through this before! Thanks</p>
<p>Others here have said “love the school that loves you” so they would probably advise that she drop off the Groton list. But I’m also curious about that very question, in our case with Loomis Chaffee. (And my daughter wasn’t accepted anywhere, so there is no school that “loves” her enough to walk away from the wait list.</p>
<p>I can’t think of any school that will call a student off of the waitlist who needs FA without also offering the funds to make it possible. In order for your child to come off the WL at Groton, both a space and funds would have to become available at the school, then they would need to choose your child to be the one to get “the call.” As you can imagine, the odds of that happening are so low as to be not worth considering. </p>
<p>As the mother of two children who both adored Groton and were both waitlisted there in different years, my advice to you is to no longer consider it an option. Be flattered that they thought your child admissible and EMBRACE the two schools that have both admitted and funded your child. You are very lucky to have choices, congratulations!</p>
<p>I don’t think there’s any reason you shouldn’t call Groton with these questions and hear what they have to say. I think they would answer you frankly. They may not be able to tell you how much aid they would be offering but they will explain their practices.</p>
<p>I agree that the chance of her coming off the WL is low.</p>
<p>I think they might accommodate you for a revisit if you ask, though probably not on the official revist day.</p>
<p>Other threads have mentioned that you could pay a deposit at another school and forfeit the deposit if Groton comes through. Since you need FA that is probably not a realistic option for you.</p>
<p>The important thing for you and your D to remember is that if you hold out, waiting for Groton, you could end up with nothing. FWIW, the choice of which schools each of my two children attended was determined by FA awards and it worked out perfect for them.</p>
<p>Jahphotogal, people DO come off the WL. If you have questions similar to the op, I think you should talk to Loomis. I wouldn’t go into it emphasizing that LC was her only acceptance, rather how much she hopes to attend, but as you’re planning for next year, you’re wondering just what are the possibilities of her coming off the list, and is there any way to get an idea of how much FA might be forthcoming in that event blah blah blah.</p>
<p>I would be one who would say you should come of the list at Groton and go with one of the schools that wanted your daughter enough to help fund her education.</p>
<p>Not only will you be competing in a shallow pool with other WLers but also, likely, those actually admitted who are on the FA waitlist.</p>
<p>As for being invited to the revisit day, I don’t think it’s appropriate. It would be really awkward and uncomfortable since there is usually a lot of hoopla about being accepted and I would think that would make your daughter feel worse. Last year my daughter was accepted at one of her top choices but on the FA waitlist and wasn’t invited to revisit day. I thought it was strange at the time but I’m relieved now - you can’t miss what you don’t know.</p>
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<p>Clearly, the OP can do whatever she wants . . . but her question has already been answered. Groton will not invite her daughter to attend unless it is prepared to meet what it perceives as her full financial need.</p>
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<p>It is absolutely inappropriate to ask Groton (or any other school) to accommodate a student for a revisit who has not been invited to enroll! The school has its hands full dealing with the candidates who’ve been offered a spot in the school. If it were expected to extend the same courtesy to students placed on the waitlist, the burden would be overwhelming.</p>
<p>jahphotogal - The answer is the same. Loomis will NOT offer your child a place unless it is also prepared to offer financial aid.</p>
<p>If, at some point between now and next August, you come into possession of funds sufficient to pay the full cost of your child’s attendance at the school, let them know! Yes, it might make it possible for your child to attend if a spot opens up, but not additional financial aid funds come available. But unless you’ve told the school you no longer need financial aid, neither of these two schools is going to offer your child a spot unless it also has the financial aid funds available to make it a workable offer.</p>
<p>Agreed,</p>
<p>One - don’t call Groton if you’re on the waitlist and ask about financial aid at this point. It sets the wrong tone and implies more than you intend. Schools WILL NOT send and acceptance without an offer of aid to a waitlisted student if it is clear you aren’t in a financial position to attend without financial aid.</p>
<p>Just let it ride. If it’s her first choice, stay on the waitlist. If she is taken off, decide what to do then (it may mean losing your deposit at another school).</p>
<p>Some schools rarely go to their waitlist (although it happens) so don’t turn down other offers hoping for an unknonw.</p>
<p>Lastly - NO NO NO - students who are not accepted will not be accommodated for a revisit. By this time students are prepping for finals, college exams, etc. The policies are clear. No revisits if you don’t have a formal offer. </p>
<p>Just wait - but send a note saying Groton is her first choice and she’d like to stay on the list. That should suffice. And update the file with any current awards and grade reports that occurred after the application was submitted (Not a lot of extra stuff - just a file or two if warranted).</p>
<p>I have a question for experienced boarding school parents - even if my DC can come off the waiting list, do we even want to go? Don’t have much experience with private schools, but at our local magnet program admissions, it’s well understood among the parents that if a waitlisted child is finally admitted, he/she will be at the bottom of the class, which may not be the best scenario. Just curious.</p>
<p>No, Bearsgarden, WL students at BS who get off the WL are usually as qualified as other students. The ratio of applicants to available slots is just so much greater than at local day schools (in some cases as many as 8-9 applicants per slot). So perfectly suitable candidates simply don’t get in on the first round – but that doesn’t make them “bottom of the class” material.</p>
<p>I appreciate the feedback on revisit day- I get the logistical problem and the emotional toll it may take on the kid, now that you point it out. </p>
<p>I am also glad to hear that folks feel schools wouldn’t call an applicant needing financial aid from the wait list without accommodating (or trying to) their family’s needs. I think I will operate on that idea and not bother the staff of the already too busy office at the school with the same question.</p>
<p>Gentle suggestion to encourage applicants to notify the schools they have ruled out ASAP.</p>
<p>Thanks again!</p>
<p>I agree with girlgeekmom. Boarding schools also run multiple programs–academics, music, sports, arts, volunteering, etc. They do practice a form of holistic admissions. While magnet schools may admit on the basis of test scores only, boarding school admissions try to find leaders in different areas. </p>
<p>If a child is waitlisted, it does not mean he or she is not academically competitive. It may mean the school needed a bassoon player, or that the committee tried to make the entering class as geographically diverse as possible, or the school had reached the limits of the FA budget, or… many other possible reasons. It could be as simple as the top fencer chose to attend a different school, so the next fencer on the WL got the call.</p>
<p>bearsgarden,</p>
<p>What is “well understood” is often parent rumor not based in fact. Nost boarding schools are well above magnet schools in terms of resources and selectivity (there are some exceptions).</p>
<p>Waiting lists simply means they found your child to be a top performing student that had attributes they found attractive but they didn’t have enough space for everyone who was qualified.</p>
<p>Bearsgarden, </p>
<p>I have children at independent private schools here in NYC and have also heard rumors like the one you mentioned. It’s all false. Be very careful from what you hear from parents. Many times it is sour grapes speaking after their child didn’t get offered a spot, another maybe their prejudice against a school that they don’t consider top tier and they themselves are too label conscious. Volunteering for the last 10 yrs at our two different schools with their admissions depts., I can tell you a WL is just that…the schools consider your child qualified and would offer a spot if they could. It’s a numbers game…remember schools have legacies, siblings to consider…then the ratio of boys and girls…then the types of diversity to bring in, etc. Here in NYC, there isn’t enough spots. People keep moving here, having more kids but the the amount of high school spots just about stay the same. I’m just about to start the high school process for this coming fall…We will be applying broadly to both boarding and day schools because we need substantial FA…but I know it can be WL across the board. It was like that for my first child at her private for Kindergarten but we got off the WL and have loved being at our school since then and never felt that she was less qualified…if fact she’s doing and has always done great.</p>
<p>Thanks everyone for your input on the WL. I think the difference is that the magnet program selection is primarily based on grades, qualify exam scores, subject area related ECs, etc, and not much other things, so a WL child will be at the bottom of the class and possibly will struggle if he/she does enter. I have seen quite a few kids in this situation who either voluntarily or involuntarily left the magnet program and came back to the home school. The experience was so hard on the child and the family, and does carry all the way to the college application process.</p>
<p>Looks like the BS selection is different. I will call the school that WLed C and confirm the spot today)</p>
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<p>Please understand that this will make no difference. Each of the schools admits many more candidates than it can possibly accommodate, with the understanding that a certain percentage will decline the offer. So each declined offer does not open up a spot for a student from the waitlist. In fact, when the school’s enrollment director does his or her job well, all of those declined offers will open up exactly zero new spots from the waitlist.</p>
<p>A school generally has no need to go to its waitlist unless (a) it has miscalculated or (b) an enrolled family ends up having to withdraw unexpectedly. And, of course, schools miscalculate . . . but it’s certainly something they try to avoid.</p>