<p>Hi, all. I have never been a big fan of dresses and have generally worn a nice black pantsuit for evening affairs. Nonetheless, this occasion will call for a dress.</p>
<p>The party is blacktie optional, although my H will wear a tux and all bridesmaids will be in full length dresses (black). Bride will be in beautiful, sophisticated, form fitting ivory lace.</p>
<p>I am reasonably tall (5’7") and a size 6. I have never cared much for my legs (not an issue if go long) or the skin on my arms–a bit flabby but also somewhat freckled. In other words, its just “older(er).” I will probably seek help from my #1 fashion consultant (my 20 y.o. D), but she tends to want to dress me “too young.” I am 56.</p>
<p>Any thoughts as to makes, designers, styles or anything? I am not opposed to spending for a “good dress”, whatever that is. The wedding is in the Fall in Michigan. </p>
<p>Also, should I stay in a neutral color? Should I coordinate with the other “moms” in any way? My stepson seems to think all the men should have the same ivory shirt (originally he wanted to dads all in the same tux, but I told my H that was ridiculous given they each have a perfectly good (rarely worn) tux.</p>
<p>Thanks. All suggestions appreciated; links to specifics, even more so!</p>
<p>One possibility would be something like a nice glitzy black evening jacket over an ivory silk shell and a tea length or longer black evening skirt. It would enable you to recycle the pieces with other tops and bottoms.</p>
<p>I think it would be helpful if you coordinate with the other mothers involved. Maybe by going through the bride. Ask her what she’d like you to wear, if she has a color she’d prefer or a style. So that you don’t either clash or match.</p>
<p>I see no reason why the tuxes of the fathers have to match the tuxes of the wedding party. But again, it’s their wedding.</p>
<p>Many of the weddings that I have been to have a color theme and the mothers don’t have matching dresses like the bridesmaids do, but do get their own dress in some shade of the colors. Most have been a nice long dress with a jacket–dressy, covers all the naughty bits, looks great. Good advice to ask the bride’s mom what color she would suggest.</p>
<p>Good suggestions, all. I very much liked the Tadashi dress, and like that it is Navy Blue (but that color may not be part of the “scheme.”) The style of the top is lovely and, if my arms don’t end up where I would like by October, provides good cover. I will check the dress for a black option.</p>
<p>Do you have an email address or phone number for the bride? A quick question to her along the lines of “Is there any style/color you’d prefer I wear or not wear?” will let you know which direction to go in. </p>
<p>I always have to tell this cautionary tale…we attended the wedding of a friend from college a number of years ago. His mother and stepmother showed up in the same dress in different colors. They already look very similar and it only added to the effect. Of course, no one said a word about it at the wedding but there are many photographs that capture the moment.</p>
<p>We happen to be in Michigan this weekend, with stepson, financee, etc so I got my questions answered easily. Her mom is in long black. The bride said any long dress in a dark color is fine (blue, chocolate or burgandy). I think I may have found my dress or at least a good starting place. Thank you, Consolation!</p>
<p>I haven’t been in one for about 4 yrs but you might take a trip to one of the ABS stores in Southern Ca. I know there is one in Santa Monica on Montana Ave. Also Pasadena and South Coast Plaza. He knocks off many of the designers. Not sure how much they have that will cover the arms.
Another designer my friends have worn is Kay Unger. Also look for other styles by Tadashi I think it is made for our “age” bracket.</p>
<p>Almost the same thing happened at a friend’s wedding: her mother and the groom’s mother wore the same dress in different colors. In this case, though, they were so different in physical type that most people didn’t realize. They did though! ;)</p>
<p>You and I are about the same size & age and the best shape my arms have been in was after I broke my leg about 3 years ago. I used my arms to go up and down the stairs with my leg held out. I figure if you start now, your arms could look like Michelle’s til October. A little powder bronzer and you will be good to go! :)</p>
<p>Do communicate with the bride/mother of the bride. You don’t want to be in a very sleek black outfit when everyone else is in a whole different genre especially if you are asked to be in the photos. You don’t have to match up with everyone, just make sure you don’t stand out too much.</p>
<p>I don’t like floor length gowns (Don’t dresses in the shops now remind you of the Sonny and Cher show?) but if my son’s future wife wanted “the moms” in gowns… If you decide not to go with black, there are some nice dresses on the Nordstrom site, and it is easy to order and return at Nordstrom if you want to check a few of these out.</p>
<p>If the bridesmaids are in long black and the MOB is in long black, then couldn’t you go for something else other than black? That seems like a lot of black at a wedding to me…</p>
<p>I just looked through the Mother of the Bride/Groom section on Nordstrom.com. You should check there! At the end of the section, there are some lovely dresses on sale. There is a silver two-piece dress with a long skirt and a jacket that has cool lines, sort of a wrapped effect. That color would coordinate well with the black. It’s also in teal green, and they have size 6 in both colors.</p>
<p>Is mom of the groom going to be there? I would think you want to be careful not to “compete” with her. But you know what the dynamics are and will choose accordingly</p>