<p>^^^ And the OP above mentioned a “barbeque”.</p>
<p>As for inexpensive wedding appetizers…</p>
<p>Any of the “pinwheel” sandwiches - stuffed with just seasoned cream cheese and herbs or meat/cheese</p>
<p>A mini caprese - thread a grape tomato, mini fresh mozzerella ball and a basil leaf on a toothpick - drizzle with olive oil vinegarette. </p>
<p>Meatballs</p>
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<p>You just made me so hungry…</p>
<p>I have priced out for various venus. It is actually less expensive to provide a buffet meal than finger food. A caterer told me that it was more manually intensive to make hors d’oeuvres than a regular meal.</p>
<p>“Okay, Julie, I need a few bits of information before making suggestions: what is the physical venue like, is there refrigeration and an oven there, are you able to make and freeze things ahead, are there any dietary restrictions, are there going to be friends and family available to help with last minute prep and service, who is cooking and serving the barbeque and what is it going to consist of, and lastly what is the season and do you have any kind of a theme at all?”</p>
<p>The venue is a museum, and while they have somewhat of a staging room set aside, I don’t know that they have refrigeration, and if they do there’s not a lot. I’m guessing no oven either, so it will probably have to be cold or room temperature stuff. </p>
<p>My mother has a large freezer in her basement so making and freezing ahead may be an option, if we had time to plan and make sure that there is space. </p>
<p>There are probably 2-3 vegetarians in attendance, but other than that, no major dietary restrictions that I know of. </p>
<p>Friends and family have volunteered to help but because it is a museum open to the public, we only have a couple of hours of turnaround time so extra hands may be needed for that purpose specifically. Something that does not need a lot of attending to and can ideally be set out on platters or chafing dishes would be a good idea. </p>
<p>The barbeque is being catered by a relatively famous barbeque place (which has surprisingly reasonable catering given their reputation). If you think upstate New York and barbeque and a restaurant comes to mind, odds are you’ve guessed it. The barbeque will be pulled pork, chicken quarters, and three sides, plus cornbread. These are undecided as there is contention between my fiance and I on these. I want salt potatoes, he wants Harlem potato salad, we will not have two of the three sides be potatoes. </p>
<p>The season is summer, colors are black, white, and teal, and there really is no theme other than “stuff we like.”</p>
<p>Julie - I think it maybe worth while for you to check out few caterers. I have found that sometimes it costs more to do it yourself. Caterers often have better access to whole sale food and they also have servers to help out. What you could save money on is to get your own wine and beer for the wedding. I would also advise you not to worry too much about people’s dietary needs. They could take care of themselves.</p>
<p>I did an NY Upstate graduation party for D1 for 100+ people. I priced it out doing ourselves vs having a caterer, they were very compatible, but a lot less work to have someone else do it. You could have your relatives/friends help out with flower arrangements. For my parents’ birthday party, I did all the center piece with roses from Costco.</p>
<p>Sounds like she has a caterer. No?</p>
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<p>I don’t see what’s so “close-minded” about a church only allowing a wedding if one of the couple is a member in good standing. I don’t think I’d like it much if I were a minister / rabbi trying to run a congregation and people who never darkened my door wanted to use my facility. They can go use a hotel or other public venue.</p>
<p>I don’t think appetizers really fit with a casual meal of pulled pork, chicken quarters, cornbread, fries and the like. Why even bother? I think of appetizers as fitting more with a more “formal” type of meal. Anyway, I’m of the school that if you have a sufficiently filling meal, you can just serve drinks first.</p>
<p>Yes, I have a caterer. They have packages with appetizers but it substantially increases the cost to something we are not comfortable paying. The price per plate for what we’re getting is less than $15, but the appetizers are 2-3 dollars per app a la carte, which is outrageous. </p>
<p>We won’t be doing floral centerpieces. I’m thinking reasonable sized vases with floral beads and a floating candle. We may spring for a few flowers for bouquets but I’m torn on that. My favorite flower is calla lillies but those run $5-10 dollars a stem from what I’ve seen. </p>
<p>We’ve really tried to cut the fat wherever possible but it’s insane how much it still costs even without the extras. No fancy lighting, basic DJ, tables, chairs, and linens, centerpieces, food, and officiant. I have shopped around too! </p>
<p>I was planning on doing wine and beer, for those interested. That’s another logistical piece I’m not looking forward to. My fiance and I do not drink so we’re have no idea how much alcohol to provide and what kinds. We have no basis for what is good and what is not.</p>
<p>Pizzagirl - That’s what I was really thinking too, but in particular my mother balked at this. Our ceremony will be short and we can have the buffet prepping while it goes on. Dinner can easily be served with a half hour to forty five minutes of the ceremony ending. I’m starting to think if she is going to be so dead set on appetizers she can plan and pay for them.</p>
<p>If you’ve got wine - have you considered a cheese and fruit table? Several blocks of artisan cheeses and some berries?</p>
<p>The other suggestions that folks had sound yummy too.</p>
<p>What is your budget for appetizers total? And how many guests again? Sorry, I know you’ve answered that one already.</p>
<p>Cromette - Budget for appetizers can best be summed as “as low as possible.” As I echoed above, I may not even do them because the wedding budget is so astronomical to me at this point. I considered the cheese spread idea but I am definitely concerned about it getting pricy. Good cheeses are expensive. That being said, it does appeal to set out some pretty low maintenance platters that people can enjoy. On the other hand, it seems too formal for barbeque. </p>
<p>Guests are probably around 80-90. We are inviting around 110 people and expect that some won’t be able to make it. </p>
<p>Oh, here is another question I was thinking people may be able to answer. I was contemplating whether I should invite my graduate mentor and his wife. We have a pretty professional relationship and I don’t share most/any details of my private life with him. He knows that I am getting married and that I grew up in the area, and that’s probably pretty much everything he knows. He is a very pleasant person however and we have a good relationship. I don’t know whether it is more awkward to invite him or not to invite him. Plus, I feel weird about serving barbeque to my successful and sophisticated graduate mentor. </p>
<p>Also, I was planning on inviting a professor from undergraduate with whom I was more personally close. I believe he is divorced and not currently in a relationship of any sort, so I was not sure if I should extend a plus one just in case, or if it would be more awkward to do so. I also have a pretty rowdy, crazy family so I am not sure with whom I should seat him.</p>
<p>We just self-catered a milestone birthday party for my H last summer for 50+ people. I used a guide I found on a website that broke down many dishes from appetizers to desserts into how much to buy, how to serve it, and offered menus by type, number of guests, and so on. Sadly, the computer where I saved it has since died, but it was very accurate. </p>
<p>We also had BBQ at our party and since potato salad is pretty traditional, we added mac and cheese, which I must tell you, was hands-down the favorite dish of the day. It’s also a staple at most every BBQ place I’ve ever seen. We did not do appetizers but did offer veggie and dip trays and cheese and crackers. We saved a ton by shopping at the Grocery Outlet-a chain-which features a lot of Trader Joe’s type food at bargain prices. Lots of organic, natural, etc. </p>
<p>The mac and cheese I made was Patti Labelle’s recipe-uses a TON of different kinds of cheese (but remember I got it cheap), and was easily made the day before and stored in the fridge. My kids begged me to make more the next day because there was none left.</p>
<p>I would invite both of the additional guests (with the plus one) - but that’s just me.</p>
<p>I also think it’s fine to forego the appetizers. Wine and beer for 30 minutes is fine if there’s a meal coming. Gives people a chance to mingle and talk.</p>
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<p>They will probably earn more money after they graduate. I’ve known plenty of young couples who got married while still in college or grad/med/law school and not yet earning any money to speak of. And I’m sure none of the guests attending their weddings and receptions were expecting to be wined and dined.</p>
<p>I’d invite both. My husband goes to the weddings of all his grad students, and some of the ones in his department that he’s collaborated with on projects. I’d go ahead an put plus one. I don’t think you need appetizers, or it could be super simple like some cheese and crackers. Caterers in your area probably have a good idea how much your crowd is likely to drink. Part of it depends on how long the party lasts. Around here, I think you can assume two drinks per hour for men and one and a half for women. Having plenty of nice bottled water including seltzer and there may be less serious drinking.</p>
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<p>We found that is the case in our area. Plated sit-down was cheaper than buffet or just heavy hors d’ouevres.</p>
<p>I’d invite your graduate mentor as well as your undergraduate prof. It’s a very nice gesture and they can decline the invitation if they don’t want to attend. My brother invited his thesis advisor and advisor’s wife to his wedding. The advisor was really excited. I remember him telling my mother that none of his grad students had ever invited him to their weddings.</p>
<p>Love the caprese. </p>
<p>Costco has good spanakopita (spinach and feta in phyllo wrap). Put in the oven, bake 20-25 minutes, done. </p>
<p>We will probably make fruit skewers in rainbow colors.</p>
<p>Deviled eggs are another possibility (not my thing, but when people bring them to potlucks, they disappear pretty fast). If we have cheese, it will probably be cubed and on toothpicks vs. a big display, which always seems to be a big waste to me at the end of the evening. Also like stuffed mushrooms.</p>
<p>Look on pinterest – there are lots of ideas. I would keep it to stuff that is simple to make, <em>neat</em> to eat. </p>
<p>Table flowers will be from Costco or TJ’s, if at all. Floating candles in mason jars and ivy are also under consideration.</p>
<p>Also considering a pastry table, though must evaluate the amount of work involved. (Pi for these two math majors is too good an inside joke to pass up.) They are getting a cake, but it will be small and not a big deal. </p>
<p>S and DIL have some friends who have food allergies, are vegetarian or vegan, so we are working on stuff that will be good for them.</p>
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<p>My point was that the wedding couple had to find another venue if ONE of them isn’t a member of the church in question or another church of the same faith/denomination. </p>
<p>In short, at the churches I was talking about, BOTH the bride and groom had to be members with documented proof or they’ll have to find another venue. Even if one of the has been a lifelong member of said church/denomination/faith.</p>
<p>I usually figure half a bottle/person, but less if you are also serving beer. You can work out something with a liquor store where they would allow you to return unopened bottles. For D1’s graduation, it was from 6-10 (some stayed later), and we didn’t have much wine left.</p>