This is years old, but it still makes me laugh. https://www.mblazoned.com/the-hair-pulling-madness-of-the-campus-tour/
3 Likes
I once bonded with a tour guide because we had gone to the same high school (just a few years apart, of course). I should not have done that, apparently.
8 Likes
This thread is hilarious. Reminds me of those Progressive commercials!
5 Likes
While touring Stanford with my two high schoolers, a pair of students cheerfully called out to our guide and announced to our group that it was her birthday. I promptly (and loudly) responded, “for realsies?!”. 1) In hindsight, I’m sure this is a running joke students play on their tour guide friends, 2) I have never said “for realsies” in my life until that moment. Why it came out of my mouth in front of 20 people while touring one of the world’s premiere institutes of learning, I will never know. My kids gracefully pretended the moment never happened. My youngest had the good sense that day to walk at the front of the group, 10 feet away from us, and was able to claim no relation.
I still internally cringe when I think about that moment nearly two years later.
21 Likes
I became obsessed with tracking down the college mascot to get a picture with it. Then commented on the size of his testicles. (The mascot, not my son). They were ENOMOROUS. It probably would have gone unnoticed, but we were touring with his girlfriend and I felt compelled to point this out to her.
13 Likes
When I was touring UW, someone else’s parent asked if there was housekeeping avaliable in the dorms for his “messy son”. The tour guide was on the verge of laughing and the poor kid looked so embarassed. I felt bad for him.
One time in middle school, my family and I toured UIUC since we were in the area and my dad made a champagne joke by asking if it was a popular on campus. He thought it was funny but it wasn’t. It was so bad. Ever since, I have gone on all the tours by myself. No problems!!
5 Likes
this is amazing. It reminds me when I was on a ghost tour in Williamsburg and they were telling a story of how they could tell who was a witch in the old coutrhouse and i blurted out in a horrible British accent " see if they float" - my family was appalled. not one person got the joke
16 Likes
On one tour, we were told that the dorms had bathtubs. On the next college tour, we went on I asked the guide if they had a bathtub, and this just mortified her.
I also embarrass her any time I compare how things were when I was in school.
7 Likes
My backpack is bright purple, and it had too much stuff in it. It was a bad look, she said. A neutral color cross-body bag would have been a better choice.
(But there wouldn’t have been room for all of my stuff! I need my stuff!!!)
5 Likes
Were you looking for Scrotie at RISD? (Think twice about a google image search if you’re at work). I’m having trouble thinking of who else you could mean 
6 Likes
First, everything I did was correct.
Second, when the BU AO showed us the campus map, he pointed out it was a grid. He told my son and I to head from B2 to C3. Instinctively, I made a very pleasant sound and enthusiastically told him he had sunk my ship.
My son was not amused.
I stand by my behavior.
23 Likes
We parents are so witty. It’s just going to take time for the kids to catch up.
15 Likes
We were on the tour at William & Mary. The guide mentioned she did tours for both prospective students AND for tourists interested in the campus history. We got to the Wren Building, which is purportedly “the oldest college building still standing” in the US. In the lobby, there were memorials to W&M war veterans, including from the American Revolution. But the Revolutionary War list was topped by “James Madison, president”. I raised my hand and pointed out that James Madison went to Princeton, not W&M. The tour guide looked at the carving, thought about it for a while, and then turned to me and replied: “Must have been a different James Madison.” I then turned to my S24 to tell him how ridiculous that answer was. But he had disappeared, and pretended he didn’t know me for the rest of the tour. Oh well.
9 Likes
Like @ProudDadandProf, my mere existence --like breathing within a ten foot radius was too much for the first kid. The next kid was fine and didn’t care what I did. But I have two more so plenty of time to screw up in the years ahead. I am sure that I will.
7 Likes
Wait until you kid IS the tour guide and then sign up for one of their tours over parent’s weekend - so much fun for 1 of us 
22 Likes
She was correct, but she didn’t know why. It was James Madison, the eighth president of WM. The cousin of James Madison, Jr. who was the fourth US President.
11 Likes
Come for the Michigan RD release date, stay for the obscure colonial American history. Thank you for clarifying that!
10 Likes
We have already been notified that this will not be acceptable
10 Likes
What if you sign up with your sister and pretend to be the nice lesbian couple he apparently wishes had been his parents? 
5 Likes