What did you learn from your PARENTS that you are forever grateful for?

Parent Cafe
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<p>(for fun, you can change your profile pic to a parent pic, if desired.)</p>

<p>H and I often talk about how much my parents taught my 6 sibs and me (and SILs and DILs). H’s parents literally taught their kids NOTHING (I am not kidding), which H laments).</p>

<p>from dear French mom…</p>

<p>economizing, re-purposing, saver-shopping
gardening, rose-care
sewing - hand and machine - everything from mending to sewing a complete outfit.
crocheting
cooking
baking
cleaning
baby-care and child-care (began changing diapers with PINS) at age 5…and how to dress/bathe a squirmy slippery baby! )
child-discipline with love, but firmness.
letting kids feel the minor hurts/bumps so that they learn to be careful
how to teach a child not to lie to you.
importance of education…teaching us to read, keeping our spelling lists by the sink so she could test us while working
the importance of keeping busy<br>
card-games
to be careful with our things…repair early
family is super-important.
mom would do anything for us…including getting up early to fill our gas tanks so that we could get our rest for school (this was during the crazy 70s gas crisis
our faith</p>

<p>from dear Italian dad</p>

<p>economical shopping and re-use(he and mom were a great pair)</p>

<p>electrical stuff (dad was a navy-trained electrician, but worked in engg in aerospace). I can change/fix a number of electrical things.</p>

<p>how to store cords/ropes (LOL) anyone who has a parent-vet probably has noticed how they wrap cords! </p>

<p>how to repair & refinish furniture, paint, change a faucet, pull a toilet, change door locks, </p>

<p>how to change a tire, etc. (if i had been a son, I would have been taught a lot more…lol. My brothers can tear down cars and rebuild)</p>

<p>how to use tools and how to safely use an electrical saw and other power tools.</p>

<p>how to gently use high-tech equipment. When we got our first stereo in the 60s, only the two oldest (my bro and I) were allowed to turn on/off for the other kids…but only after we had undergone “training” from dad and demonstrated that we would be very careful with the needles, the records, etc. </p>

<p>he taught us how to drive…a stick-shift. and how to drive to cause minimum impact to the car/tires/transmission/brakes…slow turns, slow stops, etc. and change your oil every 2500 miles (I know, with the new oils, that can be relaxed a bit)</p>

<p>how to think outside the box. dad was amazing at finding solutions to various problems. when he was in his late 80s, we still called him for solutions. Even now that he’s gone, I still ask him for help when faced with a new problem, and amazingly a new solution comes to my head. </p>

<p>how to draw…dad was artistic as well as being inventive.</p>

<p>our faith…and that it isnt girly to have a strong faith…which was important since he had 4 sons.</p>

<p>I am sure i am forgetting a million other things…</p>

2

<p>Mostly about money – how to save and how to invest. Oh, and to mow the lawn in long pants and closed toed shoes (Dad got a rock in his leg as a kid from a mower – but I DON’T accept his advice to wear safety glasses when I mow, that is going too far). And how to make the super-secret recipe family special chocolate dessert.</p>

3

<p>From my dad: to treat everyone with kindness and respect, including your children</p>

<p>From my mom: “this too shall pass”.</p>

<p>Among hundreds of other things, of course!</p>

4

<p>My dad’s sense of humor and ability to talk to and get along with absolutely everyone. From my mom: how to cook and shop.</p>

<p>I also learned some “things not to do” from both of them, but for the spirit of this thread, I’ll keep my mouth shut. </p>

5

<p>That the best thing you can do for your child is to know that you love them, unconditionally, no matter what choices they make. </p>

<p>That letting your children know you think they can do anything is one of the other best things you can do for them.</p>

<p>That the vacuum and broom can wait when you’re doing something fun with your siblings or parents because they may not always be there.</p>

<p>That exploring places and ideas not in your own little bubble of “home” is a good thing.</p>

<p>That adventures as a family don’t need to cost money.</p>

<p>That it’s important to help others, even of you are in need of help yourself. </p>

<p>To throw away to baby and childcare “how-to” books and trust your instincts.</p>

<p>That money truly doesn’t buy happiness. </p>

<p>To accept yourself, warts and all. A scar or a disability needed define you. </p>

<p>That it’s ok to call mom or dad even when you’re grown up with your own kids when you have a problem.</p>

<p>And what they didn’t-weren’t able to teach me-that no matter how long they’re gone you will always miss them. But you can talk to them in your head and if you listen carefully, you will hear their answer.</p>

6

<p>How to entertain myself and be alone with myself. Loving nature and tromping around outside. Accepting other cultures and beliefs and making great chocolate chip cookies. Appreciation for dogs.</p>

7

<p>Steer clear of religion and politics in conversation, correlation does not imply causation, the plural of anecdote is not data, science is about evidence not consensus.</p>

8

<p>Many of you had/have very wise parents.</p>

9

<p>From my mother:
To do things on your bucket list all along, as she never regretted anything she did, and those experiences (largely travel) were major joys for her. (This took me a long while to learn, as I considered my mother impractical and not focused enough on her long term goals and needs (too present-focused) but I did come to appreciate her approach.)</p>

<p>My mother was also an excellent mother-in-law in terms of being totally non-interfering in my marriage and family life, to the extent I wondered how much she cared! But I realized that she simply respected my husband’s and my abilities to handle things ourselves. I do not recall her every criticizing any member of my immediate family. Plus she delighted in her grandchildren.</p>

<p>To write personal notes for special occasions and for thank-yous. She was known for her gracious notes and many of them have been saved by the recipients.</p>

<p>From my father:
That every person has a story and can be appreciated. He was the rare individual who enjoyed serving jury duty because of the people from all walks of life he would get to know. He also never understood why anyone would ever want a private room in a hospital – he liked getting to know hospital roommates as well.</p>

10

<p>“H and I often talk about how much my parents taught my 6 sibs and me (and SILs and DILs). H’s parents literally taught their kids NOTHING (I am not kidding), which H laments).”</p>

<p>Mom2ck: We have a lot in common. . . :wink: Fortunately, my dad was able to teach H a thing or two when we lived near my parents during the early years of our marriage.
My dad taught us all about gardening and home/auto maintenance. Mom taught us that when the going gets tough, the tough don’t whine. They just keep going. She taught us to “do our duty.” She taught us how to be calm and act rationally during emergencies. She taught us to get out of bed in the morning–even if we were sick. She taught us self-discipline.
They taught us the difference between “wants” and “needs.” They taught us that life isn’t always fair, it isn’t always fun–Just keep working and save your money. </p>

11

<p>My Dad taught his kids to treat people with respect and to be kind. He also taught us to be proud of our heritage–my parents were immigrants to the US. My mom taught us the value of education and to love reading for pleasure.</p>

12

<p><<<
Mom taught us that when the going gets tough, the tough don’t whine. They just keep going. She taught us to “do our duty.” She taught us how to be calm and act rationally during emergencies. She taught us to get out of bed in the morning–even if we were sick. She taught us self-discipline.
<<<<</p>

<p>same here. </p>

<p>however, if we were “really sick” (fever, etc) she did believe in “nipping in the bud” by staying in bed, drinking lots of fluids (which she provided) and lots of sleep. However, life didnt stop for little colds, bumps or bruises…lol</p>

13

<p>My mom taught me a lot of other things, like cooking, but the most important thing was that I could do anything I put my mind to. She went back to college in the 70s while raising my brother and I during an era of SAHMs. She graduated a year before my brother graduated from high school and started her career then. She also taught me a lot about child rearing, but the main message was “The hardest thing about being a parent is that if you do your job right, the children leave you.” I think this is what kept me from being a really clingy mom- involved but not over involved- and able to encourage my kids to fly and pursue their dreams. </p>

14

<p>My Dad always warned me not to get into debt, a lesson H also learned from his parents. But I think that the greatest thing that I learned from my parents, and perhaps from all of my relatives from that generation,the ones that survived the Great Depression and WWII, is how to enjoy life. Sure, they were frugal, but they didn’t mind spending on things that brought them joy. And they SO enjoyed indulging in things that they had to do without, such as genuine butter, which was restricted during rationing. They saw the humor in just about everything, and it’s served me well in my own life.</p>

<p>I remember being at a wake when I was 14, and my Aunt Dolly, out of nowhere, commented, “Boy, wasn’t that Depression terrible?” like it was a bad thunderstorm that happened yesterday. My older relatives fell apart with laughter, until they cried. </p>

15

<p>to be honest, hardworking, thrifty and kind. </p>

16

<p>Even from my earliest memories, my mother would ask my opinion and listen to me. We did not believe that a child should be seen and not heard. I always felt that my thoughts and feelings were valued. It was not necessarily a common thing for a young woman to have find her voice. I continued this on with my child, and he learned to debate, to form his own opinions and to argue effectively. </p>

17

<p>I did learn alot of what I did not want to do. I did learn a good work ethic.</p>

18

<p>*When you borrow something return it.
*Save for a rainy day but enjoy some now since you don’t know when the lord is going to call you
*How to do just about anything around the house
*Don’t envy others, be grateful for what you have</p>

19

<p>Self reliance. Nobody is going to make it happen but you. No matter how difficult or impossible, if you want it, you can do it. But nobody is going to do it for you.</p>

20

<p>-How to have a positive outlook in the midst of adversity (always remember someone has it worse than you)
-Religious faith</p>