<p>Every year at this time, all the parents’ and students’ boards are buzzing with excitement, questions and advices for the applicants and their parents.
Now that most of the applications are done and in, perhaps it’s time for us to ponder what we really want for our children in their lives. We all want them to go to the right school. Why, to learn, make friends with the right people and grow. So they can be happy and successful.
But what does that really mean?
I’d like like to hear some of your thoughts.</p>
<p>having just had a crisis last night with my daughter- in which I prayed and even swore that I would go to church if she was ok ( I am pretty much an atheist)- I would say that I want them to value themselves- to think that they can make a difference, and to have the fortitude and knowledge to stick through the tough parts when things aren’t going so well ( and also to know when to bag it when it is wasted effort- & to write a bestselling how to book- if they actually learn how to tell the difference beforehand)</p>
<p>BTW- how does an atheist find a church to attend?</p>
<p>emeraldkity, a Unitarian Church would seem to fit the bill.</p>
<p>oh this is true- I was actually raised Unitarian- but I guess I didn’t consider that as “churchy” enough.
But that is actually a great idea- thanks :)</p>
<p>Emeraldkity4, I hope everything is okay with your daughter.</p>
<p>emeraldkity, I have prayed and promised myself. I’m a “lapsed” atheist–I’ve prayed twice in my life and my prayers were answered both times. My church of choice is the UU – or to paraphrase one of my favorite poets, I know something’s happening here but I don’t know what it is… 
I too hope that all is well with your daughter. </p>
<p>What I want for my kids… </p>
<p>I want them to value what they have in the moment, I want them to see beauty in small things, I want them to learn from the past but not dwell in it, and plan for the future but not live for it.</p>
<p>Sometimes it takes a shock for us to truely discover whats important. Emerald kitty, I am glad that your child pulled through whatever difficulty she faced </p>
<p>My health collapsed when i was 15/16 so i have taken a different route to most. When it comes down to it for me the most important thing truely is friends and family. I love education so of course its important too, but i personally dont think you realise how much you need to enjoy life until you lose the abiltiy to enjoy yourself. We take enjoyment for granted. I most likely wont be able to climb the corperate ladder (my previous dream) however in the scheme of things it seems somewhat pointless to me now. If i had children i would want them to challenge themselves and to hopefully feel like they achieved something. I would hate for them to look back at thier life at 60 and think “what a waste”. Sorry if this sounds preachy… i hate preachy comments lol</p>
<p>i want my children …
…to enjoy the good things in life (music, nature, etc)
…to have resilience when life is difficult
…to feel loved and to be loving people
…to have the independence and self-knowledge to choose their own path in life
…to be able to ask for help when they need it
…to have an active and rewarding spiritual, physical, emotional and mental life.</p>
<p>oh, and one more, to have a good and loving relationship with their mother (aka me)</p>
<p>well things arent quite out of the woods- ( it is my 15 yr old- who has depression and anxiety and is having a tough time) but I am more aware now(again) and I am keeping more on top of what is going on with her- thanks for your good wishes- she is feeling better</p>
<p>I’m sorry Emerald–I hope she is better. It’s tough to be 15 sometimes!<br>
I want my kids to find a career path that energizes them. I want them to be positive contributors to the communities of which they are a part. I want them to love and be loved. I want them to have a close relationship with their Creator and be part of a faith community. I want them to find joy in their family (immediate and extended).</p>
<p>Dear Emerald,</p>
<p>I am so sorry for the crisis time you are in. I hope the light will soon dawn brightly again!</p>
<p>I wish for my children an ability to discern and use their gifts for the good of the world, I wish for them to be loving and compassionate human beings. I pray for them peace of mind, and I pray for a peaceful world for them to live in. I pray that they will find joy in their creation and in their Creator.</p>
<p>And when the going gets tough, I pray for them the strength to hang in! I will pray the same for Emerald’s 15 yr old!</p>
<p>For my kids, I wish…</p>
<ul>
<li><p>for them to nuture and grow their current passions, to wake up excited about what they have ahead</p></li>
<li><p>for them to view themselves in the context of the bigger world, to be truly grateful for what they have and achieve, and to be willing to share those gifts</p></li>
<li><p>for good health, family and friends</p></li>
<li><p>the ability to adapt and adjust to whatever life throws at them</p></li>
<li><p>for them to finish school with a low to mederate amount of student debt</p></li>
</ul>
<p>Emerald - I’m new and have enjoyed reading all your posts. I’m sorry to hear your daughter is depressed, and wish her a speedy recovery,…</p>
<p>For my kids, I wish…</p>
<ul>
<li><p>that they are able to find something to laugh about throughout their lives ( my reasoning is that you have to be in a fairly good place to be able to laugh …really laugh)</p></li>
<li><p>be kind</p></li>
<li><p>learn something new every day</p></li>
<li><p>be open minded and able to change</p></li>
</ul>
<p>Emerald—I have prayed like crazy for 3 out of my 4 children who struggled off and on with depression and anxiety. There is hope with a good doctor and the right treatment; don’t give up. Without my Catholic faith, I don’t know how our family would have survived. I will pray for healing for your daughter, and for discernment and courage for you. It’s not easy.
What I want for my kids (ages 17-36): that they do justice, love mercy and walk humbly with the Lord. Micah 6:8</p>
<p>I love that verse, marcy.</p>
<p>I don’t think that I can add anything to the wonderful thoughts expressed here.</p>
<p>Nice question to ask. What do we want for our kids? To know love and to give love. To reach out to those in need. To find work that is fulfilling. I’ve been reading lots of posts as my S goes through the ogoing application process having been rejected from his ED school which does not defer candidates to RD. From that perspective I would add that I want both my boys, their friends and class mates to know that there is no one right school. that being turned down is not personal and is not fatal and to really believe that getting a lesser grade in a more challenging course is more rewarding then getting an A in an easier class. And more that SCHOOL IS NOT EVERYTHING! there I’ve said it. so many of these posts evidence kids are experinceing way too much anxiety and that lots of us are probably pushing too hard.</p>
<p>Sending good wishes your way EmeraldK!</p>
<p>This thread is a good reminder to me about what is important in life. It is so hard sometimes when your kids show a little interest or talent in something to not just push push push to excel and suck all the fun out of things. (That’s a quote from Freaky Friday, where the D calls the mom a “funsucker. . .” – which could have more than one meaning, now that I think about it, but in this case it is “one who sucks the fun out of life.”</p>
<p>I love the Micah verse too, even better to include the preceeding verse.</p>
<p>I’d like my kids:</p>
<p>To find something they love to do and get paid for it.</p>
<p>To fall in love with someone who is also their best friend.</p>
<p>To give back to their community by volunteering in a way that’s meaningful to them.</p>
<p>To enjoy going to Church, and to participate in keeping it strong.</p>
<p>To have children when they’re ready and we’re not too old to enjoy!</p>
<p>To dance and play and enjoy life.</p>
<p>“What I want for my kids: that they do justice, love mercy and walk humbly with the Lord. Micah 6:8”</p>
<p>Yup, that about covers it. Everything else is just gravy.</p>
<p>Amen. Thank you for the verse.</p>