http://time.com/3834365/map-topless-laws/
http://www.npr.org/sections/thetwo-way/2015/08/24/434315957/topless-in-new-york-the-legal-case-that-makes-going-top-free-legal-ish
@busdriver11 - I think there are large gray areas in interpretation. The outfits I was biting my lip about were “going out” clothes, not work outfits. There was nothing about them that was lacking in self respect on the part of my daughters - it was really about my comfort level and me just coming from a different place. And me choosing not to insult them.
@romanigypsyeyes - there are things you can wear for coverage that are not religiously mandated and might be more comfortable. I have a “rash guard” - something that arose from surfers wanting to cover their chests and upper torsos (male and female) while belly down and paddling about on their boards. The boards are prickly, because they are textured to give better traction to their feet.
Anyway, a whole industry of "rash guards’ evolved. Many of them are skimpier - just covering the torso but leaving the lower belly and arms bare. I did a search for one that was long sleeved and had a full zipper. What a great thing it is! I can swim around in the brutal sun of the Gulf of Mexico and peel it off at the end of the day and have no sun exposure. It keeps me warm in colder water too.
Some of the old guard “feminism” expressed here is distressing. We are not all “tainted” by what some women freely choose to wear or to do. That’s actually a very anti-woman stance. Thankfully, most people here don’t seem to be holding it, but I’m sorry to see it at all. No wonder the younger generation feels a need to redefine feminism.
@greenwitch any skin exposed can get rashes 
Even in the winter, I currently have them on my face and neck so I go outside in what essentially looks like a hijab. and even more covered if I’m going to be out for more than a short walk.
My point wasn’t specifically about a burkini but about the fact that I have to dress with most of my skin covered. I do it for health, others do it for religious purposes. What difference does it make “why” someone does something- whether it be covering everything or covering little- as long as someone is doing it freely? Imposing our own interpretations and judgments on someone else, especially when it comes to women and her dress and/or partner choices, is all generally a part of “slut shaming.” Women are damned if they do, damned if they don’t.
People can do what they freely want but they can’t control what other people’s opinions are. Whether or not someone respects themself is not relevant because well adjusted people have self respect but people differ in their feelings about how important it is that other people respect them. Some people don’t care what other people think and some do…If you don’t care what other people think then do and act as you want but don’t whine about it if you give off mixed signals. If you do care, then model your behavior after someone you admire for those traits and behavior.
This is high school stuff that most kids learn. If someone were to call me a derogatory name you better believe I would be doing some self assessment if only to determine if I needed to make a behavior adjustment or not. No name calling is not nice and never has been but sometimes it is a wake-up call for a stop and check.
Perhaps it would be more accurate to link it to common sense. Or the desire to be respected.
I have worked in an environment of 95-98% men for 33 years. I am completely aware that if I dressed too provocatively whether at work or on a layover, that I would be perceived as “looking for action”. I would certainly not get the respect that I desire, and people would most definitely talk about me in a way that I would not like. Even when I was young, single, buxom and thin, I was very careful. I did not want men looking at me in that way, hitting on me, or thinking I was “hot to trot”. Even when I was… 
@romanigypsyeyes - I agree. I only don’t like it if it seem imposed somehow, usually by religion, and it also goes against the dictates of something more practical, like climate or comfort.
I was home from college for the summer once and the weather was just sweltering. I had just mowed the lawn and needed to cool off. Sitting around in my parents’ house in my skimpiest shorts and little top, drinking ice tea, and the doorbell rings. I don’t want to answer it but I do. I didn’t know about the Mormon thing where young people go around proselytizing but here was this young man, wearing a suit, turning beet red, and telling me he wanted to talk about Jesus! Uhh, no thank you.
I think I was more horrified than he was. Not because of how I was dressed but because of his ridiculous reaction to it!
The problem, as I understand it, is no matter how a woman dresses some man somewhere will think she is “hot to trot” - I don’t think we can dress our way out of that mindset.
That doesn’t mean I don’t believe in industry norms of dress that sensible folks try to follow.
Hilarious, greenwitch! I’ll bet he didn’t come back!
Never saw him again, phew!
@busdriver11 - are you blaming women (or holding them responsible) for men’s potential bad (or inappropriate) behavior?
Alh I think men are perceptive and typically aren’t going to spend time in the absence of social signaling or reputation. Individuals control their own signals and their reputations. If someone is calling you out best to stop and figure out why especially if you feel it is unjustified.
I couldn’t disagree more strongly.
I don’t know where to start.
I thought the reputations of innocents were often destroyed, especially in high schools. It sounds to me like you are saying we need to stop and decide if bullies are saying something valid about victims?
The idea that what we think we are saying with our clothes is the same thing all observers are hearing just seems pretty clearly wrong to me.
That’s why only “slutty” women are cat-called, harassed, ogled, stalked, and raped, right?
A few days ago I got hit on by two different guys who know that I’ve been in a committed relationship for three years. I do not agree. 
I don’t think you have to think too hard about 0.1%, it’s the 99.9%. I’m not concerned about some man somewhere, but dressing for the majority of sane people.
busdriver: I’d be interested to know how you dressed as a young woman in a male dominated field to limit the idea you were available. Did you wear the same uniform as the men? Did you avoid makeup? Jewelry? Fancy hair?
And even though I’m really interested, I have to go to sleep now and will read it in the morning. Thanks.
@busdriver11 - you might want to read Rubin and Peplau on beliefs in a “just world”:
http://www.peplaulab.ucla.edu/Peplau_Lab/Publications_files/Rubin%20%26%20Peplau%201975s.pdf
It’s irrelevant who is going to get blamed, you can only control your own actions. And if you want to get taken seriously, you dress appropriately. If what is most important to you is to dress how you want, and do whatever you want, then the chips may not fall where you would like. I believe that the smartest thing is to present yourself in a way that people will respect, if that is important to you. And the way I present myself is in jeans, sweats and athletic gear, when I’m not in uniform. It works quite well for me.