This topic is inspired by the “What skills or knowledge do you not care about for your kids?” thread on this forum. I didn’t want to hijack the other thread because I’ve enjoyed reading it and it deserves to stay on track.
My question is what skill set, or applicable practical knowledge, does your child possess that you believe is constructive? What are kids, or people in general, lacking proficiency in that you feel could benefit them either personally or professionally?
Both of my sons are routinely complimented on their handshakes. Have handshakes deteriorated among the younger generations? I know this isn’t necessarily a skill but I believe it’s important.
S1 is a problem solver. At 13 we found him in the backyard cutting a small dead tree down with an axe because he was afraid it might fall against his treehouse. He had googled how to cut down a tree. In high school he dented his passenger side door in a parking lot. I came home to find his car in the driveway with the door wide open and the inside stripped to the metal. He had purchased a dent puller at the auto supply store and was doing the finish work, from the inside, with a mallet, or maybe it was a lacrosse stick. I just shook my head and asked him to put his car back together. He’s not afraid to research solutions and make that newfound information actionable.
For teens: Looking adults in the eye and speaking clearly. No mumbling or grunting.
For everyone: Personal Responsibility. I want my kids to acknowledge when they make mistakes and learn from them. I don’t want them to constantly be blaming everyone else for every little thing that goes wrong.
My S can navigate his way calmly in most airports and get from where he is to where he wants to be inexpensively and efficiently.
My D can readily assess people she’s just met as to their personality and things they never mention but she just knows. She’s never been wrong yet.
They are both excellent problem solvers in their own way. D is unfortunately a procrastinator and it drives me crazy. S likes to do things at the last minute as well but does give himself more time than D.
How to cook/feed themselves and how to do it well. Both my kids are excellent cooks.
How to budget and live within their means, even when their means aren’t a lot at the moment.
How to converse with anyone from the janitor to CEO of a large corporation. +1 to the good handshake and looking people in the eye. It also helps them interview well.
Critical reasoning skills, above average writing ability, and creativity.
How navigate travel on their own worldwide.
How to drive a standard transmission vehicle.
How to grow their own food and how to slaughter an animal if necessary.
How to navigate in the wilderness, camp, forage, light a fire, etc.
My daughter was always and still is excellent at interviewing. When she was in fifth grade she wanted to be a “counselor in training” at a preschool. The school requied kids to interview for this position but let parents sit in for kids under age 12 ( she was 10) So we went together. . The only thing I told my daughter was that she should listen carefully to the questions and give an answer without rambling. I sat there stunned. She was, I thought, very very articulate and gave great answers but i knojw we always can think our own kids are special.
That night the director called to offer her the position and then asked to speak to me. She told me my daughter was the most articulate kid she had ever interviewed and “ I wish some of the teacher applicants I interviewed gave such excellent answers to my questions.
My daughter told her good friend who also interviewed that for the position that the director spoke to me. The friends mom who heard said “ She didn’t ask to talk to me why did she need to talk to you” This is the kind of woman who is a bit of a busybody. I just said that I’d originally told the director that I wasn’t sure if my daughter should take the position and she wanted to see if I was ok with it. That wasn’t true. But If I’d told the friends mom the truth she’s the kind of person that would have pestered me endlessly ‘ What exactky did your kid say” “ Why didnt she tell me how my Sarah did, she was excellent” etc etc…
Anyway… daughter has been very successful in interviewing for competitive clubs that required interviews as well as for jobs.
Oh my @maya54 what a great story. That’s awesome. Reminded me of a similar situation with my son.
He came home in first grade and showed me a paper he had gotten marked down on. There were pictures relating to simple questions in a book they were reading.
In the page he complained on there was a picture of a dog but the question used the name of the boy. He answered the question as if it was the dog.
He showed it to me and explained his thought process very clearly, then asked if he could talk to his teacher.
I told him he could but don’t expect any changes (who cares in first grade anyway).
The next night I got a call from his first grade teacher. She said “I just had to call to tell you how remarkable he was.” She said he very clearly presented his thought process and reasoned with her why was the picture of the dog when they were talking about the boy.
She said that in 25 years of teaching she had never had a first grader so articulately explain his position. She followed with I can’t Change his Mark because if he had been paying attention he would have known the name of the boy.
She followed with “I make so many calls for children having problems that I like to call to talk about the good things. I think he may be a lawyer some day”
She still was one of my favorite teachers throughout his education.
He’s not going to be a lawyer but he has been very successful in Interviews.
How about a thread about the skills our kids had or have that we parents don’t have… (along with how it impacted our own ability to function when kids grew up and left the nest).
I’m showing my age here… but I never did figure out how to program a VCR. My son had the thing mastered from the time he was a preschooler. He was the older kid, and I don’t think his younger sister knew either – so basically the kid went off to college in the year 2001, the VCR sat unused, flashing the numbers 12:00, for a number of years after that… until I finally just disconnected and recycled all the electronics. (I was able to figure out how to disconnect the cords from the back of the t.v.).
My daughter was the one with legible handwriting who could actually fill out a form or address an envelope in a way that others could read it, from age 7. So she was designated form-filler for many years. That is also why she had a credit card in her own name at age 8 – without my knowledge, she had filled out and returned a credit card solicitation on her own, and actually was approved for credit.
Math. I have discalcula. I truly have trouble adding even simple two digit numbers because I often reverse numbers. One of my daughters is good with math. She tutored algreba in college. The other is well pretty phenomenal with math and has a double engineering degree. Side note to the teacher who told me I shouldn’t tell my kids that I hate math: lol. Kids are not as silly as you seem to think. As I told you, I explained why I hated math and why I thought they might feel differently.
Drawing a straight line, cutting a straight line. I have zero ability to do these things. Kids have no issue
Learning a foreign language. Like many discalculates learning a foreign language is very difficult for me. Both my kids had no issue.
As for how it was for me as an adult with these deficits, it taught me to focus on strong points and not spend time worrying about things I wasn’t good at.
My daughter can drive a manual car, or in her case, mostly a 1975 VW bus. She’s taught many a 17 year old boy to do it, and it’s quite hysterical to watch as they are all about a foot taller than her and think they know everything.
My guys, having grown up on a farm, know how to do a lot of things from growing things to fixing things to breeding critters or dispatching varmints. Fortunately our travels have also taught them to navigate cities/airports. Their youth has made them useful for when I need smart phone help, but they learned those skills elsewhere.
@doschicos wrote out a good list, so I’m just going to latch on to it for some more specifics.