<p>Okay, this is a silly topic for CC, but I value the expertise and experience here on these boards. </p>
<p>My sister, her husband and their two boys will be visiting for 2 weeks. They are all lovely people, the boys (elementary age) are well behaved, and we haven’t been able to visit for the last 2 years, so this is a welcome visit. I am wondering, however, if it would be too rude to have food available and let them “do their own thing” for the most part, aside from some planned “family” type meals. </p>
<p>They have been here for 2 days and I have made 2 breakfasts and 2 dinners, feel as if I am spending all my time cooking or cleaning up, and, while they are polite, they don’t seem to really like what I make. We have been empty nesters for the last 6 years and are pretty much out of the family style meal thing, eating very lightly, while they are in the throes of cookies, crackers, fast food, etc. </p>
<p>The bowl of fruit has been somewhat successful, and the drinks in the fridge outside have been popular, too. Halibut, basically a bust. French toast, yogurt, sausage, eggs type things definitely not worth the effort. I was thinking that I would invite my sister to sit down with me and craft a list of items they enjoy so that I could stock the cupboards and then all of us might be more comfortable. Suggestions?</p>
<p>When I have my sister and family over, also usually for 2 weeks, I stock pantry with a variety of cereals, pancake mix, freezer with waffles and they are in charge of breakfast. I work so I’m not there any way. For lunch I make sure we have a variety of cheeses and cold cuts, salad stuff for sandwiches. Dinner is on me…kids are now older than elementary but fish wouldn’t be on the menu…hamburgers, pizza and pasta would be on the menu but that is my crowd…I have known elementary aged children who eat lobster so it all depends on the family… Sitting down with your sister and discussing menus would be a good idea.</p>
<p>We had two German exchange college students. Iasked them what they would like me to get for them to have for breakfast and they suggested bacon and eggs. I said that I would be happy to buy that, butthat they would need to get up early to cook it!</p>
<p>Talk to your sister. I agree that three meals a day for two weeks is too much–for you. I would definitely ask what the kids like to eat.</p>
<p>An easy, easy thing to make is to get a loaf of Italian bread and a package of ham or turkey. Cut the bread lengthwise and load it with the meat and some lettuce and then cut it into about six pieces. It looks kind of fancy when you put it on a tray. Chips and some fruit and you are set. You might also take a look at the thread about helping out a sick neighbor. There were lots of meal ideas on there. Good luck.</p>
<p>BTW–I never cook breakfast or lunch for long-term guests. “Make yourselves at home,” is what I always say.</p>
<p>All my extended family works pretty much the same way. We fend for ourselves at breakfast, but if someone is making eggs (or whatever) and others are around who haven’t eaten yet we ask if we should cook some for them too. Otherwise we tell them where the cereal is and what’s in the fridge. We eat family dinners together when we visit. Usually the visitor will pay for at least one meal out or have take out. We always ask what is likely to be eaten, but it doesn’t always work out. My oldest was horribly picky and might only eat bread at some meals. But they do grow up. Last time I visited my brother who is married to a woman who doesn’t eat meat she planned a fish meal. It ended up being sushi which he has never been willing to try with us. At the end of the meal he said to me (out of her hearing), “Well, it seems I now like sushi.” Lunch really depends on what we are up to. But mostly we do talk about it with both families trying to be helpful.</p>
<p>Why don’t you take your sister and the boys food shopping with you and let them pick out some things they like? This can be a lot of fun if you have an interesting market or store like Wegman’s nearby. My mother-in-law does this when we visit her in Florida, and it still works well now that my daughters are teenagers. Once you have things they like in the house, they can be on their own for breakfast and lunch.</p>
<p>Okay, I think I am on a good track now. I do believe my husband was “egging” a bit of this on, having not been the recipient of down home, home cooking with the frequency he would like. </p>
<p>BTW, the kids actually loved the halibut (we beer battered it and deep fried it–a rare occurance!) so it was a fish and chips meal with cole slaw, etc. DS was not happy I served fried food. I was proud of catching the 55 pound halibut, though! :)</p>
<p>I had planned on taking them on the shopping trip, and actually usually have a pretty good grasp on what little ones like (I teach primary) so the problem is not really with the kiddos. I am glad to hear that this is not too far outside of convention and that
others have been successful having guests “make themselves at home.” </p>
<p>Don’t know what Wegman’s is - we are in rural Alaska - but we can all go to the commissary together and get food everyone likes. Thanks!</p>
<p>Halibut is one of those fish that people who don’t like fish often like if it’s cooked a certain way. If it’s fresh out of the ocean, beer battered and deep fried . . . I defy anyone not to love it.</p>
<p>As for feeding the visiting masses – for breakfast I’ll put out a variety of nice breads and make sure everyone knows where the toaster is. Then butter, jams, peanut butter and maybe some sliced ham. I usually splurge and buy a ready made fresh fruit tray at the grocery. That usually handles everyone. </p>
<p>Dinners are all about big salads built around prewashed greens, grilled fish or meat, rolls, and usually a side dish bean or pasta salad from the grocery store. Dessert is usually ice cream and my daughter’s brilliant brownies.</p>
<p>I’ll often cook a big breakfast on the guests’ first morning and/or a weekend. Otherwise, people have what they like and serve themselves. Lunch during the week is the same way. On weekends, if everyone is around mid-day, I might put out a platter with breads, cold cuts, cheese, lettuce, tomatoes, condiments, etc., a bowl of cut up fruit, maybe potato salad or chips, and invite people to help themselves. I help the little kids make their sandwiches if they want me too or the parents don’t beat me to it. Tommy doesn’t like mustard, Sally doesn’t like Swiss cheese, Uncle Bob likes hot sauce…everyone gets what he/she wants.</p>
<p>In the summer, dinner is some kind of grilled protein, a salad, rolls and maybe grilled vegetables. And wine!</p>
<p>I don’t like it when my hosts feel like they have to fuss to much over me and I assume others feel much the same way.</p>
<p>We are usually the visitor at my inlaws house. The first year we visited and found no fruit in the house, we stopped at the store and bought a supply of fruit for my daughter, the fruit queen. It amazed me that my inlaws had their other granddaughter living with them and never carried fresh (or canned) fruit in the house. </p>
<p>When it came time for dinner, they would always ask what my kids wantd to eat. I would tell them whatever they were cooking, this wasn’t a restaurant. Apparently, the other granddaughter (my daughters cousin) got to pick what she ate every night because she didn’t like what they adults would eat. Her choice- fried meat, french fries. No veggies, nothing healthy.</p>
<p>The inlaws were also surprised that my kids knew how to clear the table of their dishes when they were done eating. Again, their cousin (from the age of 10 years old) didn’t know what the dishwasher was…</p>
<p>When we stay, to give us a break from all the fried food, I would make sure to cook one or two meals myself for the entire family- marinated prk chops, enchiladas, etc. That plus us staying in a hotel room kept us sane.</p>
<p>Now when we visit, MIL makes sure that they have fresh fruit for DD. It only took 5 years of visits to get them trained :)</p>
<p>If you don’t mind having people in your kitchen, why not have several people help cook? That can be great bonding time. You also could have people take turns cooking.</p>
<p>Do these boys know how to cook? If not, why not say part of their vacation is going to be learning to cook. Delegate one as “sous-chef” every day. I would think watching a cooking show together might make it more fun for everyone.</p>
<p>Agreed with everyone else that getting a variety of breakfast & lunch foods and letting them go on their own is just fine. We usually really let everyone run on their own schedule for breakfast, and just put stuff out (sandwich stuff, fruit/carrots, stuff like potato salad, cookies) for lunch and call everyone together. Dinner is “cooked”, but often crockpot, pot of chili, etc. We like to make a fire in our fire pit and let everyone toast (we have some sandwich holders that are great, or hot dogs are fine). Sometimes we grill. When I have several guests over several days, I don’t usually cook most side dishes from scratch. Sweet potato fries from Trader Joes (although our local grocery now carries them), macaroni salad from the deli, bagged salads, pre-made hamburger patties, etc. Then there is always pizza or Chinese takeout occasionally The kids might like to make brownies or something for dessert, and there is always ice cream.</p>
<p>I have to say that our meals are not as healthy when we have guests that stay for a while, but I’m not cooking meals for a whole extra family for two weeks, either… I’m going to do what keeps me sane and all of us fed :)</p>
<p>Your post resonated with me. Will never forget spending a week at my in-laws while seven months pregnant with second child. There was NOTHING to eat except instant Cream of Wheat, pop tarts and Marie Calendar frozen pot pies. Oh, and endless packages of Fig Newtons. I literally ached with hunger for real food.</p>
<p>The mention of pizza reminded me that I used to have my kid, when he was my nephew’s ages and even younger, make pizza with me. We would make the crust, spread it out, then he would do the toppings to his likings and we would cook it and he was so proud! I remember my kid calling from college and wanting to do it himself and not remembering that the dough needed to rise! </p>
<p>Perhaps, if it is okay with my sister, we could either do the homemade crust or small Boroli (sp?) crusts and have a great time! Thanks! </p>
<p>Oh, and my husband has been a great help and did do the Halibut in a turkey fryer outside. We baked the french fries. The only reason we have a turkey fryer is that we had a friend who had gotten it for Christmas many years ago, called us and a bunch of our friends and scheduled a turkey fry at our house. He brought the fryer (with faded Christmas wrap still attached to the box) and we hosted. He then left the fryer (over objections) and occasionally schedules a party at our house. Other than these parties, the halibut fry the other night was the only time we have used it. </p>
<p>I don’t want my guests to be miserable! We do have a ton of food in the house, but I didn’t want to get too much before they came because I didn’t know what they liked. Now I can’t wait for them to get back from their excursion so we can go shopping! </p>
<p>Then, on to the canoe, the bikes, the Arctic Circle…</p>
<p>"Your post resonated with me. Will never forget spending a week at my in-laws while seven months pregnant with second child. There was NOTHING to eat except instant Cream of Wheat, pop tarts and Marie Calendar frozen pot pies. Oh, and endless packages of Fig Newtons. I literally ached with hunger for real food.:</p>
<p>Curious about why you didn’t go out and buy some groceries and then offer to cook some meals.</p>
<p>Wow…two weeks!! Even for shorter visits, here’s what we do. Breakfast and lunch are “do it yourself” meals. We show everyone where the food is…they make their own (I do brew a pot of coffee for all interested for breakfast). Breakfast…cereals, breads, fruit, juices, milk, coffee are in the kitchen and they can make or choose what they want. Lunch…same thing…cold cuts, sandwich fixings, salad fixings, fruits, veggies, beverages…help yourself.</p>
<p>Dinners…we do a combination of cooking and ordering out (think pizza). Our relatives (even on short visits) offer to cook a meal here and there for dinner.</p>
<p>And most of our relatives also chip in on the grocery and order out food costs…we don’t ask, but they do. </p>
<p>None, however, have ever been here for longer than a few days.</p>
<p>OP is in Alaska and for a trip like that, it makes sense to stay longer. However, I always love company who comes for two weeks, but somewhere in the middle they take off and give me a break.</p>
The kids might like to make brownies or something for dessert, and there is always ice cream.</p>