<p>Ok tonight between my dh and childrens report cards I became a raving banshee (3 hrs later and I am still ticked) AM I the only one ready to go and kill them, and if anyone else feels that way, will you volunteer to be on my jury :rolleyes:</p>
<p>As a teenager, I find it very sad that you acted like a “raving banshee”.</p>
<p>Seriously, you should stand behind your kids 100%, and if they are doing badly in school, try and help them out. If they aren’t trying, help them figure out a solution.</p>
<p>Parents should be the ones who stay strong in such situations, not the ones who freak out.</p>
<p>Parents are only human. We freak out sometimes. </p>
<p>And nobody can stay strong all the time. </p>
<p>I wish we could.</p>
<p>Yes, but you should try to refrain from screaming at your kids.</p>
<p>Are your kids not trying, or are they trying and getting low grades? There’s a huge difference between the two. I can understand getting angry if your kids aren’t trying and/or lied to you about their grades, but I can’t imagine getting angry at someone who’s putting in a lot of effort.</p>
<p>I’ve never been yelled at for grades. If they were on the low side, my dad would talk to me and remind me to try my best. My mom normally knew about what my grades would be before they came out since I’d talk to her about individual grades throughout the year as well as my guessing for my final grades.</p>
<p>Halie,</p>
<p>I respect your opinion as a teenager, but you need some background from a parents standpoint. We worry about you more than you could ever believe, we worry that you have enough sleep, we worry about the bullies, we worry about your self esteem, we worry about your heart being broken, we worry about the internet, we worry about sexual activity,we worry about getting good enough grades to get into your dream school. In other words I worry about everything multiply that by 3(# of kids). My DH and I have groundrules…our job is to give them a home and a soft place to land, their job is to go to school and get good grades. I am not a parent that expects 100’s, I ask my kids to look me in the eye and say they gave their best. I am perfectly fine with the occassional C, I am honest Geometry and Physics almost killed me, I can deal with it. If they study and bust their hump no problem, If they didn’t than they failed their job…no if and or buts period dot!</p>
<p>I will say thank you for your opinion, but honestly we are also human, how many times do you scream you just don’t get it to us, and we listen to doors slamming and shouting at siblings. I love my children and would be lost without them, but they are in h.s. and approaching college age and want me to treat them like adults…with that background please help me out.</p>
<p>I didn’t lose it on a 14 yr old, we are talking about 16+</p>
<p>This is now being taken way out of context.</p>
<p>Did I lose it…yes!
Why…b/c the grade dropped due to the fact that they hid it and I was blind sided. My kids know tell me upfront…everyday I ask them 4 ?'s…how was your day, what did you learn, what made you happy, and what did you learn you shouldn’t do?</p>
<p>I ask everyday how was school, do you have homework? It is not that I am not involved, so to be hit upside my head when we could have helped earlier made me lose it.</p>
<p>I totally understand your frustration. Hope that posting here has helped & your finding a way to work things out and get the kid(s) back on track.</p>
<p>I am back on track, just don’t know how many times I will have to hear… I don’t know why… I was lazy…I forgot it was due.</p>
<p>My frustration was and is, how do we get it across that this is THEIR LIFE…if anybody can show me how I am all ears (eyes)…It is my fault according to society for not paying more attention if they are not good students and it is my fault for being the hammer …can we all say rock and hard place::(</p>
<p>I understand a little better now.</p>
<p>I’m just sick of hearing about kids whose parents are constantly pressuring them, and assumed you were one of them. I have so many friends whose parents punish/yell at them for say, a C on a test when it’s an off day and they’re normally a straight-A student.</p>
<p>Never have been one of them, I didn’t give birth to g*ds and don’t expect them to be one either…do the same for me, parents are human too and we get hurt also</p>
<p>bullet - dont take this the wrong way…but if you ask them the same 4?'s everyday…maybe change the questions??
Trust me, I’ve been through it too and some days you can take it better than others.</p>
<p>and here when I saw the question, my answer was going to be: The first time I rode the Tower of Terror at DW…I couldn’t help but scream!! ;)</p>
<p>I don’t back my kid 100%…I once threw my kids mathbook across the driveway…she got a 40% on a math homework quiz…what is a mathhomework quiz? its where all you have to do is go to your notebook and COPY the homework- it was the teachers way of giving kids a chance go to bring up their grade while seeing if they are doing the homework- which the CHECK everyday…,</p>
<p>yeah, the book tossing freaked D out…better than making her eat the pages I suppose</p>
<p>why don’t I back them 100%? because they mess up, and sometimes they aren’t deserving to be “backed up”- sometimes they need to deal with me being super crabby because of their mess ups</p>
<p>such is life</p>
<p>Lax… try dropzone at Pamount, you will scream</p>
<p>citygirl… you are on the same page, but that is not politcally correct now. I would not mind an F on a quiz if they studied, but getting an F because of being lazy is just arrogance and disrespect to your teacher and me…at this age they know the rules, not following them is like spitting in my face…sorry kids, but as a parent that’s how I feel.</p>
<p>I wish they would understand we give them more free passes than any boss would ever give…such is life and love</p>
<p>I gave my oldest a matchbook from the Compton Union Building at Wazzu (saved from the early 70s) that had a list of “30 occupations without a college degree” and a note including the local phone number of the lawn mower repair school… She got the hint.</p>
<p>Sorry you went through this, though. Remember, they are invincible and nothing can touch them…</p>
<p>Let’s move from this point what ride actually made you scream the most…</p>
<p>DropZone…IT is a 272 foot free fall…You get strapped into something similiar to a swing and pulled straight up to the top so you can see as far as your eye can see, then they drop you, start to finish 1 minute…30 secs to get to the top, 20 sec at the top and 10 to get back down</p>
<p>This will now become the funniest thread kids making you scream and the scariest rides</p>
<p>2cakes 
to cool for words</p>
<p>bulletandpima, I concur,a ride like DropZone in Las Vegas made me scream the most. Its on the top of one of the hotels in Vegas, in Vegas you drop and quickly bounce up to drop again. DS was only about 7 when we went on it and I truly thought I was going to die. I remember screaming on the way down and on the short trips back up reaching over to DS and asking if he was ok. (of course he was fine, enjoying the ride while I was terrified). After we got off the ride I needed to get down off the top of the building. When I think about the trip to Vegas its one of the best of our lives(right up there with the Drop off day story) - we’d had a garage sale and DS had come to me with the money he’d earned and asked how he could divide it in two - he wanted to give half to his school “to make it a better place” and the other half was so we could go to Vegas and see the white tigers. While his contribution of less than $25. didn’t pay for much - we had to make that trip and see the white tigers(Siegfried & Roy’s magic show).</p>
<p>Back to the OP’s original question/intent: :)</p>
<p>My oldest did exactly these sorts of things as a middle school and high school student. He is gifted, creative and yet would do boneheaded things like just not do homework OR do it and not turn it in, and receive numerous zeros accordingly. Then ace tests and get overal “C” grades when capable of excellence. He HATED what he considered to be “busy work” (and it often was for him!!), so he just often did not do it. I did scream…quite often. </p>
<p>Fast forward a bit. My son is an excellent HS teacher (British Lit). He does NOT give busy work to his students and is that teacher who finds amazing ways to inspire and motivate them. He found his passion…that’s what it takes!</p>
<p>Perhaps you could talk to your child about the reasons for not doing the work (not saying they should be allowed to not do it…). Maybe also see if your child might be a bit bored with some of it, and find ways to motivate them that would stimulate them academically…</p>
<p>Best to you! This for me was just about the hardest thing ever!!!</p>