It feels so good to be in a FU position! Happy retirement, showdad!
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Amazed that the others didn’t “ get it” but hooray for your H for taking a stand and sticking to it.
Wishing your H a happy retirement.
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Too bad the management/HR is so clueless. If they really depend on him that much, they could have designed an interim position reporting to somebody else .
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I’ll just say that the last 4 managers that have been running H’s group are all Danish and they are a very certain type of manager.
The only thing H wants to still ask his HR friend about is the fact that in the meeting H had today they said the ***hole had applied to the manager position. H did not know there was an open rec for that position.
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Even worse! He should have been aware of an opening that might affect his dept and makes you wonder if the a—hole was the only one privy to this opening…. 
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This definitely sounds like a situation where moving on without looking back is the best option. The company may well rue the day they let him leave, but that’s not your H’s problem. I really respect him for standing up for himself. I kept my mouth shut about why I really left - I gave part of the reason, but not the underlying issue that caused the part I shared - and TBH, I kind of wish that I had given the whole truth. It would have changed nothing, but dang, when the stuff hit the fan (which it did), they might have been haunted by my truth.
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Agree. I requested an exit interview when I retired and I spilled the tea on how I had been treated by my previous manager and how I had very good reason to believe I was blatantly discriminated against as a woman over a certain age. The HR person was pretty horrified and I named names.
I absolutely have no regrets. I knew it would not help me but it felt good to say it and hopefully it helped someone else.
( note: that was the manager I worked for the first 9 years there. I worked the last 3.5 years in a different department under a different manager who was a super nice guy).
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My retirement date had been set in stone due to the vagaries of the teacher retirement system in my state. However, it was cemented in carbonite after I met the new asst principal at the start of my last year—-the ***hole boss type referred to upthread. He was 10000% by the book, which meant I had to set both long-term and short-term goals, sit through never-ending review meetings, etc., etc., etc. I had been at this school for 31 years, chaired my department, and had no blemishes in my personnel file.
Example: he asked me what my short-term goals for the school year was. I very clearly joked when I said “to keep from being fired!” I smiled and waited for him to laugh with me—he just stared at me stone-faced for what seemed like forever–finally I added “Um Dave, that was a joke…..”. He just said “OK, then, let’s start over: what are your short-term……”
A year after I retired, I heard from my former colleagues that he resigned and went back to teaching history, totally disillusioned with administration. He could not believe why everone else was not as gung-ho about being totally by-the-book as he was.
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Congrats to showdad for leaving on his own terms. 
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My last year at my full time job, I was also asked to complete long and short term goals…which was ridiculous because I knew I was retiring. So…I wrote them, but then never did anything to complete the plan. I resigned in January, and basically told my admin she could spend her time evaluating the rest of her staff…and funny…she agreed.
My only long term goal was to clean out my room. Short term goals were distributing materials to my colleagues.
Those weren’t what I put in my plan…to my admin. But those were my real goals.
And re: my building admin…he and I had butted heads about union issues for over six years. He met me on my way out with my last load of stuff and said “I’m really going to miss you.” My reply…”no you aren’t”.
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Fortunately, my boss knew I was going to retire long before I retired and knew the date something like 7 months before I retired, and she and I were on the same page regarding what I will call “management exercises.” She HAD to do them or get “dinged” herself, and I cooperated - so for example when asked about my short term goals I put “prepare for retirement,” and things like that. Long term goal - “travel.” We had to do quarterly check-ins. She would do something like send me an e-mail saying “This is our check-in. Let me know if you want to talk.” She’d press the buttons saying it was done, and I’d press the button saying I agreed, etc. Life went on… This was during a period with a lot of work from home, thus e-mail as opposed to face to face.
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My dad’s 89 and STILL keeps his nursing license active (and does the CLUs!). He retired in 1997-ish. It made sense to keep it active when he was caring for my mom, aunt and grandmother, but those responsibilities ended when my mom passed away 13 years ago. It’s hard to drop the rope…
H said a couple weeks ago that “when he retires from federal service…” he’s going to look for other opportunities. Has had some folks approach him. He’s overseas this week and I said, “Maybe they’ll want to hire you when you retire!” and he said, ‘Don’t laugh. I’ve thought about that.”
So maybe instead of traveling overseas, we’ll live there?!?!?! (or he commutes and I stay here?) It would get us closer to S2…
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I had lunch with a former coworker yesterday. The organization is chronically short staffed, but right now they are in a real bind for certain tasks that must be done. These tasks used to be a small part of my job, and while the student information system has changed since I left, I could easily figure it out. My friend jokingly asked if I was interested in the ten hour per week position that they are trying to hire for. I didn’t even hesitate to say no!
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@showmom858 – did today turn out to be the last? Enjoying vicariously your H getting the upper hand here…
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@gardenstategal Thank you for asking. Today is his last day. We are on the west coast so he is meeting a coworker at his office at 9 am to give them his laptop and phone. H said he will be there a couple of hours as he needs to upload some stuff to the server that was not uploading for him yesterday. The HR person is for his division is in Florida and there is no formal exit interview. H already said everything he wanted to in the second meeting on Wednesday morning. He has handed off everything to the 3 coworkers who will take on his work for now. Yesterday he received a couple of really nice messages from coworkers in Europe saying how they could not have gotten through some recent system changes without H’s help. H has no regrets and is looking forward to whatever comes next.
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My hunch is that he will feel far less stressed and far more liberated than he can anticipate. It is remarkable what we tolerate and tune out as we march through the days.
Congratulations to him!
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