<p>I think the suspension of car privileges can be explained in a way that it is a “natural” consequence of the infraction. You chose to front the money for the fine. That means money is not available for car insurance. When your son has paid you back, you can pay for the insurance.</p>
<p>edit: checked the date and this probably moot by now</p>
<p>I think what you asked about I can relate to. Your disapointment is natural – you are transitioning from being the parent of a child (albeit teenager) to that of an almost adult. It’s hard, parenting a child whose behavior is mostly innocent and childlike and very forgivable, and then almost overnight it seems, their behavior can sometimes shock us. It’s so NOT what we taught them, what we are used to seeing, what is fairly predictable. And it’s not that innocent behavior that was pretty much without significant hurt, great disappointment, or stinging regret. As we continue to transition, the sting becomes easier to take, and we garner more strength to handle what comes. Our fantasy of our children disappears, and the reality of who they begin to become creeps in. But hang on, as it changes frequently, has a lot of ups and downs, but eventually becomes a pretty good place to be.</p>
<p>My daughter (HS Freshman) disappointed us also by “sneaking out” with a boy and once with a female friend. Nothing harmful happened, she mainly wanted to see a female friend. This is a sheltered A student etc. etc. and of course, because she was sneaking out with the elementary school principal’s daughter, the whole town found out about it. What a way to start HS. We live in a small town (which I dislike and am not used to) and I am having a hard time too.</p>