<p>Unless you have a budget that you must keep, I would go over the list of what she wants and pick out what the most important things are to her before setting a dollar limit. If this is a big deal thing in your area and it is her senior prom, it may be worth while to stretch a little. It can go a long way in making her happy. But she should be well aware what the family financial situation is. </p>
<p>My son chose NOT to go on his senior trip in part because of finances. Had he really wanted to go and if his crowd were all going, as the situation was for his brother who did go on his senior trip, we would have paid for it. But as we were going through all of the upcoming costs and things he wanted to do, it went by the wayside for my last high school graduate.</p>
<p>I’m pretty sure that I spent less than $100 on prom, total. My dress, which I picked up and for which I got many, many compliments, was about $60. I borrowed nice shoes from my mom. I was a junior and it was the senior prom, to which I’d been asked by a friend (I didn’t end up going to my own senior prom), so he bought the tickets, which were pretty cheap at my school. We split a limo with a bunch of other couples with whom we were friendly, and I don’t think we paid more than $20 each for that. We went to Steak & Shake afterward after discovering that the bowling alley was closed.</p>
<p>I did not do anything weird with my hair. I just timed the application of conditioner such that my hair was tamer during the evening than it would normally be at that time of day. Not that the tameness stayed after an evening of dancing. I wore minimal makeup - had my mom not insisted, I would have worn <em>no</em> makeup.</p>
<p>I’m not a big fan of the paying-megabucks-for-prom thing. I knew people who spent $300 on a dress, and at least $100 more on hairstyles. What on earth is the point? But then, I’m kind of butch and kind of frugal.</p>
<p>When proms don’t include dinner, do kids go dutch? Where I grew up, kids went for expensive multi-course dinners before prom and girls chipped in for their own meals. Actually, the girls’ dads gave the dates the cash directly. Is that still done?</p>
<p>At my D’s senior prom, the girls who spent the most on hair and makeup looked the worst - especially the orange ones. I have never seen anyone look good in an updo with tendrils. I think setting a budget and letting the kids decide on the priorities is a good idea.</p>
I’d feel exactly the same way for the same reasons. Nix on tans too, having had a big chunk of my arm removed for a melanoma. However it’s moot, since I have boys and the older one didn’t even want to go to the prom. The younger one, we’ll see…</p>
<p>“When proms don’t include dinner, do kids go dutch? Where I grew up, kids went for expensive multi-course dinners before prom and girls chipped in for their own meals.”</p>
<p>S went dutch to a reasonably priced restaurant - Chili’s or something similar.</p>
<p>It so depends on the school, the kids, the proms. Most of the proms here are a pretty big deal in that they are held at very nice places, include meals and are definitely formal dress affairs. But the after prom seems to be a biggie here that used to simply be hanging out at a friend’s house or going to the school to hang out. Here with NYC in our backyard, kids will go there after the prom; that’s why the expensive limo for the night. A lot of clubs cater to this crowd, and there are private and open after prom parties. Sometimes they go to the Hamptons or other beach house that someone in the crowd owns. It can get really elaborate. </p>
<p>On the other hand, the girls at the last prom I saw did not seem to be that made up. The clothing was simple, the makeup was not thick and the hair looked pretty natural. Nothing like some things I had seen. The boys were more formally dressed as they all wore tuxes whereas many of the girls wore short, pretty but not fancy frocks. A club was reserved in the city for after prom, but my son and his friends elected to go to a house where parents had things set up for them. The girls left around 3Am and they all met up at a Brunch about 11 Am the next day. They did regret scheduling that brunch, my son said.</p>
<p>The party for a Hispanic girl is traditionally at 15 not, 16. It is a quinceanera. These parties are almost like a wedding and a great deal of money is generally spent, often with the parents borrowing money to have the event. To me, this is different from a prom in many ways.
It has both a religious significance and a significance for the entire Hispanic family.</p>
<p>Geez I don’t even remember where D’s prom was and it was just a year ago. Maybe at a vintage hotel?</p>
<p>I did buy her dress at a designer outlet mall, ( but if you count the blood I lost taking her around to & we ended up at the first place- it wasn’t so much a bargain)
It was pretty, she even wanted my opinion which was a shocker- I may have bought the shoes too, or she wore someone elses.</p>
<p>That was it, she paid for a manicure and all that stuff that she and her friends had done. She also had a group dinner at a friends, and stayed overnight after. ( some girls stayed at a hotel, she chose to stay at a friends, where she was more comfortable) Some girls had dates, some didn’t. She also paid for the pictures, cause I have seen them & I didn’t give her any money. ;)</p>
<p>Parent group does keep cost down by subsidizing it.</p>
<p>My mom actually had to prod me to spend money!</p>
<p>I spent maybe 200 on the dress, wore shoes that I already had (they were flats…I do believe I was the most comfortable girl at the prom :)). I had a close friend and her mother do my make-up, got my hair done the morning of at the local salon. I had my nails done, but not my toes as my dress was floor-length and I was wearing flats. I did have to spend about 40 dollars on a crinoline because of the way the dress was made. We went to the actual prom in the guy’s mom’s convertible. Mom found some gorgeous costume jewelry online that I still have for formal occasions. My wallet was big enough that I just took that as a “clutch”.</p>
<p>Then I spent about $60 on pictures (per mom’s request). I think mom was more amenable because I’d never been to a school dance before and she wanted me to have the full experience. Prom wasn’t super important to me, I went mostly to spend time with my friends as much as possible before graduation as I knew I was leaving in the fall.</p>
<p>My HS freshman daughter was asked to the Junior/Senior Prom yesterday by a Jr friend. She doesn’t know if she will go yet. Her friends were way more excited about the invite than she was (the boy is just a friend). The prom will be in the school gym. My daughter, being sensible and frugal, wants to wear the spaghetti strapped, red glittery, mid-calf length, semi-formal she wore to Winter Ball, but friends are already planning what kind of dress and shoes she just has to get, and what to do with her hair, etc. My question is does semi formal work for prom? Oh, and she looked absolutely gorgeous in it.</p>
<p>since shorter dresses are more popular now ( as my D said, she doesn’t want to trip when going up and down the stairs) , but mid calf sounds like an awkward length, can it be hemmed?</p>
<p>A tip for girls trying to save $$ on manicure/hairstyles: check if you have a beauty school nearby that offers these services at reduced rates. D got her hair done at a local Gene Juarez Academy for a fraction of what it usually costs at one of their salons, and her hair looked fabulous. Her trainee stylist was supervised by a professional instructor. The academy loves prom time :)</p>
<p>After re-reading the mid calf thing, the dress sounds kind of Amish, but it’s not. It’s not all that length, just some triangular sections which come down to a point. (I have no idea what they’re called). The dress is definitely stylish. Since shorter dresses are ok, I guess if she wants to go and wear that one, I’m ok with it. And my wallet appreciates it, too.</p>
<p>We paid $300 for D’s dress, but it was truly amazing. It fit her personality to perfection, nobody had ever seen anything like it, and she looked ridiculously good. I didn’t mean to spend that much, but when I saw the dress on her, I was … done for.</p>
<p>We still have the dress and would never give it away. Hopefully something will come up that she can wear it to.</p>
<p>Good thing that was last year. This year hubby is facing a lay off and I wouldn’t have done it.</p>
<p>For D, it was pretty easy, since she only fit ONE dress in the entire store both times we shopped for her prom gowns–junior & next year senior. She actually has since worn one of the dresses for a wedding and looked stunning. She may wear the other one as well. She also has two dresses she bought for winter ball, tho she only wore one of them.</p>
<p>So much depends on the family financial picture, what the event & trappings means to the particular kid, what the other kids are doing (especially the friends) & all of that. D gathered at friends houses for these events & then had an after prom party & slumber party at a friends’ home with the other gals in her group. </p>
<p>Her friends ran the gamut between buying a $300 gown to buying a vintage thrift $25ish dress to a borrowed gown and everything in between. Some of the girls did their own hair & makeup while other had it done professionally. They also got bouquets, leis, corsages, or whatever the couple had agreed upon, with the boys getting leis or boutinnaires that were mostly purchased but some were lovingly made. The meal was included in the price of the ticket. They took a group picture of the girls & couples photo.</p>
<p>My S did NOT attend any of his proms or balls. He kind of wanted to attend his senior prom, but by the time he asked the girl he wanted, it was too late (I believe she had already accepted someone else’s invitation). It turned out for the best tho, since S was ill for the week prior to through the week following the prom anyway. I am encouraging him to consider attending at least one formal dance in college (his engineering school has one every year), but don’t know that he will, especially as he & GF broke up recently.</p>
I wore minimal makeup - had my mom not insisted, I would have worn <em>no</em> makeup.</p>