<p>hey mega, didnt u also get into Harvard??</p>
<p>No, I didn’t apply to Harvard…there was no way my parents would have paid for it, since that’s where said family friend’s son had an unhappy experience.</p>
<p>Sooo, today, I had National Honor Society inductions from 6:25 to 10 P.M. Now, my school isn’t in the safest area, so an old friend of mine asked me to walk her to her car. Naturally, I acceded to her request. So we’re walking down the pavement, when who should drive by (in the area looking at apartments, of course[sarcasm]) but my beloved (more sarcasm) father. Naturally, when I get home, I get another lecture on staying away from girls, and how I don’t appreciate my parents, and I will once they’re dead.</p>
<p>At this point, no, I don’t appreciate them, and I won’t. I’ve put up with all this crap because they’re my parents, but this is ridiculous. They’re stalking me. I’m stretched between math competitions, figuring out college stuff, AP exam review, NHS on top of everything else, and now they’re stalking me. Right now, I’m not even sure I love them.</p>
<p>“appreciate my parents, and I will once they’re dead.”</p>
<p>More likely that you’ll only get away from them once they’re dead…</p>
<p>Actually, if Chicago doesn’t work out, I’m going to UGA. We won Knowledge Bowl again earlier this week, so that’s another 7500 in cash which I could use for any incidental expenses at UGA. If I’m in that position, I’m almost certainly moving out of my house once I turn 18 and in with one of my friends who graduated a couple years ago and has an apartment with a spare bedroom.</p>
<p>So hopefully I’ll get away before then…</p>
<p>“Naturally, when I get home, I get another lecture on staying away from girls”</p>
<p>I supposed you could have said they were transgender (but I suppose that would have only made it worse, lol). </p>
<p>Congratulations on Knowledge Bowl!</p>
<p>Sounds like you have a plan :). Good luck!</p>
<p>I bet when your parents will see that you are serious about moving out to live with a friend and going to UGA, they’ll back off, and you’ll end up in UChicago…</p>
<p>Maybe you should tell your parents you are gay, therefore, you couldn’t possibly like the girls or you are thinking about becoming a girl and therefore you want to hang out with girls first to get at least a partial first hand eyewitness account of life as a girl.</p>
<p>Hahahaha, bluealien, not sure how feasible it is, but that gave me a much-needed laugh.</p>
<p>I’m at Chicago right now:) I really really want to go here. Let’s see how econ goes tomorrow though…the Director of UG Econ telling the crowd that this wasn’t the best route for people who want to be in business didn’t help with the parents naturally. One step forward, two steps back describes this process.</p>
<p>Ugh, so the student I talked to was misinformed about there being econ courses on Fridays, so I didn’t get to sit in on one. Now I really don’t know…I think I like econ, but I’m not sure. I’m sure I like business, but I have so many other interests. I sat in on a Human Being and Citizen class that was pretty cool, and then a physics 3 class which was really hard, and then the legendary Honors Analysis class, which lived up to billing.</p>
<p>I also visited CAPS (Career Advising and Planning Services) and got a list of OCR companies…it’s a nice list. But the lady who deals with people who want to go into business was depressingly honest…she said UChi’s alumni network is undersized compared to my other options.</p>
<p>Also, I really liked everything else about the place. So now I’m very torn. How important is the alumni network? And how different is theoretical econ from what I would need for business?</p>
<p>If there is any way you could visit Stanford, you should check it out. It will give you the name recognition, the alumni network, and the liberal arts education.</p>
<p>Mega, you should be grateful that the U.Chicago people are being honest. Maybe its not what you want to hear, but it impresses me more about Chicago than anything else possibly could – when you are making decisions that can affect the next 4 years and possibly you future career path, you need facts and not sugar-coated answers. </p>
<p>You also are very lucky that your parents are willing to fully fund your college education, and that you have such an array of wonderful choices. </p>
<p>Here’s another truth: In the end, as far as your life and future is concerned, all of the private colleges you have listed are the same. They are all the same because they are all excellent colleges that will give you a top notch education, and after you graduate you will be able to get a well-paying job and get into an MBA program of your choice. (Its better to work for a few years before going for the MBA, if possible). It doesn’t matter what the alumni network is like --you only need one job. You will find a job, with or without connections. </p>
<p>So in the end, its not about choosing between Wharton or Chicago or Stanford-- the choice you have is choosing between your family and your independence. UGA offers you a very different future – it will give you a reasonable education, you will get a job when you get out – but the degree won’t have the same level of prestige – and it will probably end up leading to a different career path. But what it does offer is complete financial independence from your family – and for some young people, that’s a better future. But it is not the SAME future… and I have a feeling that despite their overbearing nature, you do love and respect your parents – so it is not an easy choice. </p>
<p>When you are not-quite-18 and you have controlling parents, independence looks good. For you, it may end up being the best choice you can possibly make. But it will not be the easiest choice, and you need to think long and hard about whether that is what you really want. You need to think about all your educational and career goals, and sort out what YOU want from what your parents want for you. Sometimes that’s hard because there is a lot of overlap. </p>
<p>You need to picture yourself in this situation: the year is 2012. You have a degree from U of Georgia. You are living with your girlfriend. You both have decent but not impressive jobs. You have an entry level management position with a small company based in Atlanta. It pays around $38K a year. You and your girlfriend are thinking about getting married; your job has good prospects for advancement, and you are saving for a down payment on a house. You have manage to reconcile with your parents, but it was tough – for several years you weren’t speaking, and they are still angry and disappointed that you left them, and they don’t approve of your girlfriend. Are you happy? Is this the life you wanted?</p>
<p>Of course, the other future path probably involves a prestige degree, a job with a fancier title and better pay, and your mom still trying to run your life at age 24. What your parents offer is a financial foundation for a job and future with more material trappings of success, but it may or may not be the life you want.</p>
<p>I don’t think its fair that you need to make this choice at age 18, because it is one of those “no going back” type of choices. So you really need to look deep within yourself. If you make a choice out of feelings of anger or resentment toward your parents, it is no better than doing what they want – either way, the choice is primarily governed by what they want, not what YOU want. So you need to let go of the parent-induced emotions for a time, and try to come to terms with what you want for yourself.</p>
<p>Since you are interested in studying economics, you might try to frame your choices in economic terms, and look at the choices in front of you in terms of their respective opportunity costs. By that measure, going to U.of Georgia can turn out to be a very expensive choice.</p>
<p>Good post, Calmom!</p>
<p>I have to agree with reasonabledad, that was a wonderful, heartfel post Calmom…very kind of you to put such heart into your writing. I am suspecting that megalomaniac is now at a point where he doesn’t want to give up any of the schools, because it closes a door and he wants/needs doors opening instead. I agree he will do well…and none of these schools will limit his options. </p>
<p>Megalomaniac, dig deep inside…where do you want to spend 4 yrs and then do/say whatever it takes to get there…after all, you will still be you once you arrive on campus…ready to go, learn and mature. Hang in there…enjoy the success and have confidence that you cannot make a bad choice.</p>
<p>Calmom, first let me say thank you. I really hadn’t looked at it that way, and from that point of view, I don’t think I want to go UGA. Not just the future financial issues, but also that I don’t like the prospect of being that estranged from my parents. So that reduces it a bit. And I definitely feel much better about whichever decision I make among my remaining schools. Thank you so much!</p>
<p>My two cents:</p>
<p>If your persuasions are, as you state, “very liberal,” I’d suggest Stanford, Chicago, or Yale. The fact that you are experienced in blending smoothly with southern conservatives is commendable, but you might want to consider spending four years being who you are without having to modulate. The “One of your own kind, stick to your own kind” principle.</p>
<p>S,C, and Y are also far from Memphis - so you CAN have a girlfriend, for instance. Your parents will not find it easy to impose their values from a distance. I’ve worked with many Indians for years and years - some of them who allowed their parents to choose their careers, and who are unhappy now, regretting that they didn’t explore more options and that they gave in to parental pressure to lock into a specific career early.</p>
<p>Mega - Also, you are Indian, correct? Have you visited Stanford? The Bay Area has a thriving thriving Indian community. And there is an association called TIE, The Indus Entrepreneurs that has launched untold numbers of just what it says, Indian entrepreneurs. And they take care of eachother. You want to talk an alumni network, combine Stanford with TIE and you are set.</p>
<p>If you are out here, it is also true that if and when you decide you want to reintegrate your families values to your new values (assuming of course you really throw it aside) you will be in an area where that is easily done, in the company of many many people who understand your experience.</p>
<p>Good luck.</p>
<p>Mega, I have been following this thread quietly, and paying close attention to your posts. You are articulate, a great thinker (maybe an overthinker!) and a very good writer. Your intellectual curiosity is wonderful; you are interested not only in economics and business but in psychology, art and literature. College is the place to find out what you truly love doing; it is not required that you envision a straight and narrow path when you leave home as a freshman. If you asked some of the most famous people in their fields how they got there I am sure that most of them will tell a long and crooked tale with many diversions taken. I don’t have any suggestions about where you should go–that’s your decision to make. It sounds to me that altho your parents are conflicted about your leaving home (as are all of us parents), they are not giving you ultimatums nor are they refusing to pay for any school, correct? You love them and don’t wish to alienate them, but give them credit–they are probably less fragile and more flexible than you believe. From the picture you paint of yourself it seems to me that the best thing you can do is chose a school where you have the most options w/re to majors, interdisciplinary studies and all kinds of programs/classes that will be exciting for you. What you bring to college is more important than grad school rankings or any vague promises about corner offices or where you will be in 20 years. Think about what school makes you feel comfortable, where you have the most academic flexibility and where you will enjoy yourself for the next four years.</p>