I used to tell my girl’s teacher, “I send my kid to school with her hair perfectly combed and outfit all clean. Why does she always come back look like she has been through a cyclone? Is it too much to expect to have kid returned back to me in the same condition?”
if the twins are cold, then they’ll have to learn to zip up their own jackets - the sooner the better- that is if they want to be warmer.
you can ask then if they are cold , then remind them if they want to be warmer all they have to do is zip them up, but refuse to do it yourself.
Ask them to help each other out.
Sooner or later, with your help, they will figure it out.
I teach 3 to 4 year olds. 100% of my kiddos can put on their own coat. 80% can now zip their own coat. If a 4 year old can do it, a 6 year old can certainly master this. You’ll have to decide if this is really an important battle for you to have with your twins - not with their teacher nor with your 16 year old.
I agree this isn’t feasible or desirable for a teacher to tackle. From a practical sense, try running a candle on the zipper, and tying a zipper pull on the zipper. Both make it easier to zip, Then some Saturday, have them practice beating each other – have a zip-off.
Then ask when they get home, who won the zip-off today? And perhaps their sense of competition will be your ally. Or not. No power on earth can keep a coat on a kid who just doesn’t care. Not a battle to fight.
@TexasCollegeMom, yeah they can do it themselves but their lazy and like it done for them, its the same with the hood, they like their sister to put them up for them too.
DS’s teachers used to remark that he hated to wear his coat for recess, etc. He complained to me when I made him wear his coat, too. Here’s what his pediatrician said when I mentioned the concern: “He’s not a stupid child, he will put on his coat when he is cold. Being cold isn’t going to make him sick. Don’t worry about it.” This kid will soon be 30 years old and STILL hates to wear a coat!
This reminds me of a time when my older daughter was 5 or 6 and we took her and her sister to the school playground on a fall evening. When we wanted to leave and she didn’t and we gave our reasons for wanting to leave, she said, “I like the dark. I like the cold. I like mosquitos.”
Let it go (the cold apparently doesn’t bother them anyway.). Okay, sorry. Look, it doesn’t matter if their coats are zipped or their hoods are up. Unless they have some kind of comprehension problem, they will not allow themselves to get cold or at least not more than once. Choose your battles and for goodness sake don’t put their sister in the position of having to fight with them about something so inconsequential.
@ScottishNicole Why don’t you try the carrot and stick method. If they have their coat on all week, they get to… choose a special dinner on Friday or pick a book for you to read them at bedtime. If they don’t wear a coat then they have to sit on the couch at home for five minutes and plan how they will remember tomorrow WHILE HOLDING HANDS. I don’t know if girls hate holding hands but boys do. Sounds like they just want attention and to be fussed over. Fuss over them when they get it right.
Seems like this is a pointless battle to fight. Surely the kids can tell for themselves when they feel cold enough to put on a coat. And if they are too lazy to do so when they feel cold, they themselves face the consequences.
It’s a simple request. They should do it out of respect for their mum and aunt. It would be nice if the teacher could simply remind them but if not they need to find a way to remember. Auntie could even just let them know that they are not leaving until jackets are properly on. And say nothing more. Just wait however long it takes.
My guess is that the teacher does remind them: everyone zip up those coats and put on your hats. And maybe even, for one brief moment, everyone does.
But the teachers have much bigger fish to fry at dismissal-- like making sure that none of those little kids goes home with someone NOT on the approved list. (So for example, ensuring that the non-custodial parent, against whom there may be an order of protection, doesn’t stop by “as a treat”.)
If your kids are cold, they’ll zip up or ask for help.
If they are too warm, maybe they need a lighter jacket.
If they are not putting them on because of spite, they need to learn about consequences, especially for disrespect.
Have them write “I will not forget my coat” if it is done out of spite - and for some kids at that age, they very well may be testing the boundaries.
If they are neglecting their coat because they are overstimulated, it isn’t hard to find a way to make them focus on learning something they won’t forget. By age six, they are old enough to understand a timeout, or stand in a corner, for critical thinking time.
They may be the type of kids who listen and take direction well. I told my pups plenty of times that there are kids who learn from others, and there are kids who have to learn for themselves. When some kids are told don’t touch the hot stove, they say thank you, while other kids need to smell the burning flesh.
Explain why you want them to be warm and safe, and to be respectful of big sister. As a parent, it is your responsibility to teach them to be able to face the world. Perhaps you still have a few things to teach them - like a lot of parents of six year olds
Me too! I couldn’t figure out why there wasn’t a washer and dryer at the school…and an iron…so my kids would,come home as spit polished clean as when they left my house! :))
When they are cold, they will put their coats on and zip them up. This is not worth fighting about. At six the kids can do it themselves.
My kids were like Mainelonghorn’s. I was lucky to get them to wear long pants and shoes. I was not alone, either: moms used to joke about how child services would be called on us because of our coatless kids.
https://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=5184405 may be helpful in the context of this thread.
Where experience with discomfort is not severely harmful (i.e. feeling cold is not the same as getting frostbite), it may be better to let experience, rather than helicopter parenting, be the teacher.
Still fighting this battle with the 16yo. We just had some seriously record-breaking rainy weather.
I pick D20 and three friends up from school (after about the third day of rain). All look like drowned rats.
Me: Why didn’t you wear your raincoat and take an umbrella?
D20: I guess I forgot.
Me: How did you forget? Wasn’t it raining when you left the house this morning?
D20: Yes.
I just stared, rolled my eyes, shook my head, and drove home - where I had to promptly store my car in the garage with all of the windows and sunroof open so that the interior could dry out without getting musty and/or moldy smelling.
Kids these days.
Well, I’ve been stuck at my college for half an hour because my car won’t start :(, every time I turn the key, the engine just cranks and pumping the pedal is not helping.
Anyone around to get a jumpstart from?
Do not fight a battle over zipping up coats and putting on hoods with your twins, and do NOT make your poor 16 yr old a proxy. When they are cold, they’ll put them on and zip up.
The idea of making a big deal about something so trivial, with charts and so forth…no, just no. Save that for something like practicing an instrument or doing their homework or chores.
^^^ Same @Consolation.