Im a guy. Second semester. And college sucks. I can tell this will be the worst 4 years of my life. Everyday its always something that ruins the day no matter what. The basic classes seem useless and just a way to drain money from people. I hate dealing with most people on campus. Somebody stole my keys to everything. My car,dorm,house, ect. When classes end Thursday i go immediately home because i live 40 minutes away so i can get away from college because its like a high school that i hate but instead im forced to stay here 24/7 and this is the second college i been to already. Im not into drinking and partying or getting laid I just dislike college in general. I just want to graduate and be done. I know alot of people somehow enjoy college. I don’t know how people enjoy college.
Change your perspective (and attitude), and if that doesn’t work, change the environment. But something’s gotta give.
Preamble hit the nail on the head. That’s exactly what I was thinking when I read your post.
Have you considered seeing a school counselor?
A few thoughts:
- Maybe college is just not for you. Either at all or perhaps not just at this point in your life. College is not for everybody and ages 18-21 is not the optimal college age for everybody.
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Im not into drinking and partying or getting laid
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It’s fine not to be into the first two (preferable even). But frankly for a guy your age not to be interested in the third is a bit concerning. I think you might want to try looking into some counseling as there may be other issue(s) at work here.
If you don’t want to do college, there are great vocational paths in the military or trade school options. A motivated plumber will probably out earn the majority of his peers that go to college, over a lifetime.
If you are committed to a career that requires a college education, and if you are successful in the schoolwork but lacking social success, consider changing something about the way you are approaching this.
I remember your posts last fall, when you were feeling out of place at the conservative school.
This is your second college this year, so I presume you started with the beginning of spring semester (a couple weeks ago?). It seems awfully early to be rolling out on Thursday night and heading back home. You won’t have the opportunity to make connections and find a group of life minded folks if you take off for the weekend. Join some clubs, find a job, try to make connections and see how you feel at the end of the semester.
I kind of feel the same way this year. My very first semester I absolutely hated it. I was in a very bad major I had no business being in so it was probably my fault. 2nd semester I loved and also 2nd and 3rd years loved. However I’m in a completely different environment this year.
My first 3 years I was basically at a regional campus that wasn’t actually the main campus. Loved those environments, I related great to all the people there because they were just like me and I got along with pretty much everyone I worked with there. Main campus this year is a completely different story. Not only is it like 3 times more expensive, but the whole campus is just full of snobby out of state rich kids that I absolutely can’t stand. I hate being on campus and as soon as class is over I have no reason to be there and I just go home. I commute back and forth, I live about 20 minutes away from the main campus so I’m thankful I don’t have spend even more money and stay up there. This is my last semester, it just started 2 days ago and I already want it to be over. I’ve always been a private person naturally, I’m like you and I don’t like to go out and get drunk and party I think it’s just a waste of time and money. That’s all I hear people do on weekends up on the main campus and I’m just not into that I’m sorry. My whole thing with college is that I wanted to go and get the hell out. I badly wish I could go back to the regional campus I went to the first three years, that was the best educational experience I’ve ever had so not all my college experience has been bad just this year I’ve really loathed. I hate being in this environment that I’m in now thankfully it will be over in about 4 months.
Yeah I’ll try to stay a week considering that my car keys are gone anyway. Its at the point where i don’t eat dinner really because i don’t feel like going to the cafe wheres there sooo many people at. There’s also no food places besides one which i never been to and i don’t want to seem stupid in front of people so i just ate an apple for dinner last night.
@soze “It’s fine not to be into the first two (preferable even). But frankly for a guy your age not to be interested in the third is a bit concerning. I think you might want to try looking into some counseling as there may be other issue(s) at work here.”
- he's a college student, what do you mean it is "a bit concerning" if he's not into getting laid while being in college...People go to college to get their degree and make a living in the long run, im a college student and all i want is a good gpa and a degree, not getting laid, and im a 20 year old guy, im assuming that makes me a bit concerning as well? Your comment was kind of pervy to be honest, just saying.
@Redthunder Im thinking you’re going thru social anxiety or something, just be yourself and try to make yourself be happy more, that’s fine having a good time in college is only .0005% of the experience, just work hard and get your degree, what else is college for anyways…?
I know. I can’t help it. I can’t even order food for dinner. I’ll probably just eat an apple for tonight again.
@RedTunder - I do not understand why you can’t eat food with others, or go to a new cafe. You need to make a visit to the school counseling center ASAP.
Its because i never ate there before and I don’t want to look like an idiot because i also have a speech problem.
So you guys are telling me your in college but dont want any of that 3rd thing? And @Shipsarecool, college does not only have to be about the degree. You can still have an enjoyable 4 years where you will make many memories while still getting great grades. By negating the entire social aspect of college for grades (which isn’t mutually exclusive by the way), your just making excuses as to why you arent socializing. And as you said it is a bit concerning about you.
first off, @redthunder hugs to you. This sounds like a tough time…I am really sorry about the keys. Things sound very hard right now. My recommendation is that you just kind of take it one step at a time…sign up to talk with a school counselor (you’re paying a lot of tuition and you deserve it! don’t feel bad about asking for this) and then just sort of take one day at a time. Things are going to work out for you…you are just in a rough spot right now.
@ooohcollege so you’re telling me since im not looking in to get laid, I lack a social aspect of college…? I said all I care about is getting good grades, that means I don’t mind or not whether I have a social life or not… That should be everyone’s #1 priority when entering colelge it’s called RESPONSIBILITY… #Justsaying
@RedThunder I’m so sorry you’re down. I understand the useless classes thing - as an elementary education major, a lot of my classes are over things I learned in high school, which is silly. I figure that it’s what I’ve got to do to become a teacher (which I DO want to be!) so I do it. Don’t drop out - keep on persevering until you have that degree (unless you really don’t want/need the degree).
College is definitely a hard place for people that dislike having to meet new people or constantly be around people. I definitely like my alone time! Are there any really quiet places on campus? When you get your car keys again, are there any places off campus that would be enjoyable to spend time at? Try going to the cafe again. You don’t have to try and meet anyone new, but it’s important to keep eating. 
If that’s too much, is there a kitchen in your dorm building somewhere? Try buying a few basic things that you can make or TV dinners to heat up (especially if you have a microwave in your room), etc.
When you say you can’t order food, do you mean over the phone? You mention a speech problem, and I don’t know what kind you have or how it works, but try writing a script before calling. That’s what I do to talk on the phone (I’m terrified of it). I write out all the things I need to remember to say and sometimes responses to possible questions. I can write less now than I used to (just bullet points now) but there was a time I wrote it all out. I don’t know if that would help you, but it’s worth a shot. That way you’re just reading words off a page instead of having a conversation.
You might want to go see a counselor on campus, as everyone else recommended. It will be scary, but they want to help you and won’t judge you. You seem very intelligent - not stupid, and you’ll be respected by the staff. Their goal is to see you succeed. Obviously this isn’t a happy time you’re going through, and it always helps to have someone come alongside of you to show you a way out.
As far as something ruining everyday, try thinking of good things that happen. Today I forgot about a take-home quiz in one of my classes (so I got a zero) and I almost let it ruin the day. I was so upset with myself about it, but the reality is that there are lots of quizzes in that class, and things happen. No need to beat myself up about it. Besides, it was beautiful weather today and I left for class on time (a rare thing for me) and my breakfast this morning was delicious. See? I had three positives for one negative! Try hanging on to good things to break out of the sadness.
Good luck, and I hope things start looking up for you.
@Shipsarecool grades are not always the #1 priority. You ever hear of the old adage that A students work for C students. Mind you not the typical C students, but the ones who spend their time networking and other professional endeavors. It usually cant hurt to get good grades but you need to budget your time accordingly.
@ooohcollege Networking and professional endeavors definitely need to be weighed in importance along with grades. I don’t think that someone who’s not interested in getting laid really needs to include that in their priority list, though. Future employers aren’t going to look at your history of sex when you apply for a job, lol.
I mean they can spend their time however they like but whats life without a little fun.
I get you, bro.
Yea well i got over my anxiety and ate but i just dont like going to large crowds especially by myself cuz i feel like loner. I still haven’t found my keys yet.