<p>In our generation, no–there was little to no art direction on the part of the bride. I had to bite my tongue when my MIL showed up in the ONLY color I didn’t want her to wear, ivory (my dress was a champagne silk shantung and my bridesmaids wore ivory). Not only that, she wore a silly hat. These days, everything has a theme and creative direction and a lot of attention to how it all looks. I blame Pinterest and social media in general. Although I do like to see invitations that use interesting graphic design elements rather than the raised Copperplate or script typefaces of our day.</p>
<p>PG, the purple Missoni dress is perfect for many reasons. I could see wearing it again with boots and a jacket or sweater in the fall.</p>
<p>I support the OP wearing her beautiful dress to the wedding.</p>
<p>It doesn’t really matter to me what others wear or what others spend on their clothes if it makes them happy. I am totally okay if you wear sweat clothes (old thread) or couture - but I, personally, only want to wear natural fibers (because they breathe and feel better to me) and since I am incredibly cold natured, I have always worn a lot of wool, including tropical weight wool in the summer. I do not want to wear a blend. At what price point is it possible to buy a 100% wool dress off the rack? Without a synthetic lining? Does anyone know? I also like to wear silk but that is a whole 'nother fabric nightmare imho lately. Things are labeled silk but I just don’t believe it. </p>
<p>It’s off topic but I already confessed to being clothing obsessed. And if gourmetmom comes round again, I’m guessing she knows the answer. Maybe bunsen does as well? I do not. The fabric itself is going to make the dress fairly expensive before you add in labor costs.</p>
<p>Silk wrinkles too much as does linen. I always feel messy in them so I tend to shy away from both. But I do have lovely silk frock with underdress that I love. Maybe I should wear that to the b’day party. </p>
<p>I’m going to go look at my LBD and see if it was a blend. BRB.</p>
<p>Ok. Dress is a blend and mostly rayon. Made in Italy. At least 5 years old. Probably in $400-$500 range. I don’t go over that for short dresses. Shoes, OTOH. </p>
<p>I was wondering whether one of the OP’s friends had suggested that it would be tacky to re-wear a dress that had been worn to a previous wedding? To me, this seems like it would be a totally off-limits suggestion. First, because it is critical of a decision that the OP might make–and that I think is the sensible one to make. Second, because in social circles with people of different income levels, in my opinion that sort of remark belongs in the category of, “What, you are having Sevruga caviar instead of Beluga caviar at the reception?” (Do I still have the price order right?) Third, because it seems to me to put the focus on one of the less important aspects of the wedding, and unless the OP is hanging out with the people for hours upon hours, there are probably more significant things about the wedding and marriage itself to talk about.</p>
<p>Beautiful dress for your son’s graduation, PG, and a lovely and appropriate color choice! Out of curiosity, I looked up the dress, and noticed that no price is shown (clever), because it is currently unavailable. I am more envious that you have already picked out the clothing for your upcoming trip. I am leaving on a week’s trip tomorrow, and will probably start gathering whatever I have around here sometime soon.</p>
<p>Your mention of silk is interesting, alh, because I also feel that there are items labeled as “silk” that don’t really seem like the silk I bought thirty years ago. Presumably they are silk, and there is just different processing.</p>
<p>I gave away a NM dress that I wore once to cousin’s son wedding, as well as others that got worn once or twice.</p>
<p>It was easier when my friends were in the Bar Mitzvah years. Dresses I bought back then got a lot of use. All my g/fs reused dresses or silk suits. </p>
<p>I do tend to want something new when going to a party with same group of friends or family.</p>
<p>Silk can be woven into various fabrics. A shantung or a dupioni won’t be as wrinkly as a charmeuse or a crepe de chine, for example. Knitted fabrics like silk jersey resist wrinkling. </p>
<p>-- Fang, who is not a fashionista at all but who knows her textiles, and who loves linen but agrees it wrinkles if you look at it</p>
<p>I think that if you wear the same dress as the MOB, it gives the message that the event wasn’t important enough to put in the effort to buy something new. So at the very least, you want to make sure that your son, daughter in law and her family don’t perceive it like that. But even if they don’t, some of your guests may. You may be stirring up gossip and second guessing behind your back at the wedding when I’m sure that is not your intention. So in the end, you might be drawing more attention to yourself than if you found a new dress. I would certainly wear an old dress as a guest, but remember you are still considered a hostess at your son’s wedding. </p>
<p>alh, it is really next to impossible to find a 100% wool dress with a silk lining on a typical store rack. Also, brands like DVF and Issa that used to make their signature dresses of silk jersey are now also use 100% synthetic fabrics, so one has to watch out and study fabric contents carefully. I wear synthetics without an issue (and also because I’m allergic to wrinkled clothing - ha-ha), but I can see that someone with a sensitive skin might have a problem. Manufacturers are supposed to disclose the fabric contents on the labeling, but there are exceptions. Here is a link that has the official disclosure information:</p>
<p>I looked up silk in my copy of Fabric Sewing Guide. It says, “Test the drape and hand of the fabric to determine if it will be suitable for the design you are planning. Crush the fabric in your hand. If it crushes and wrinkles, it is poor-quality fabric.” So I’m guessing that many garments labelled Silk nowadays are silk, but they are lower quality silk.</p>
<p>Regarding the question about wool: I assume you are talking about woven fabrics (for suits, etc), not knits. It’s a style thing, not a price point thing. Current style for women’s clothes overwhelmingly favors lightweight wools with stretch, which requires the addition of synthetic materials. So, a pair of black trousers from, say Akris, which charges $1000 for a pair of pants, will be a wool blend to get the specific look that a stretch wool blend allows in a gabardine fabric. </p>
<p>There was an article in the New Yorker a couple of years ago that credits the founder of Theory for popularizing this trend. </p>
<p>“And why should the fashionistas dictate what the OP should or shouldn’t do? Dress yourself (and your spouse if he will let you), but don’t expect everyone else to want to put the same amount of energy and money into it.”</p>
<p>The OP asked for opinions. Those of you who are unengaged in clothing said - it’s fine to re-wear the dress. Many of us on the more fashion-engaged side also said it was fine to re-wear the dress – myself included. So the unengaged are giving opinions, but the fashionistas are “dictating”? </p>
<p>Some of us who said it was fine to re-wear the dress also said WE personally would likely go buy a new dress in that situation. How is that “expecting everyone else to put the same amount of energy and money into it”? </p>
<p>And who here has said that there’s a minimum amount of money that “has to” be spent? No one. </p>
<p>CF - I would absolutely consider parents part of the wedding party. They’re walking down the aisle, they are in all the same pictures as the bridesmaids/groomsmen. Of course if you’re putting your bridesmaids in yellow, you don’t want your MIL showing up in teal. I agree the “rules” are less rigid than years ago, but sorry, this dress was a very deliberate look-at-me, and not because it was elegant. It was a deliberate “you said pink so I’ll go with fluorescent pink.” We all know the difference. </p>
<p>Love theory - especially their trousers. No other brand fits me as well. </p>
<p>As for the manufacturing bit, my cousin is in the business (mid priced suits and coats - say $250-$400ish) and she told me what they do is buy the very high priced designer suits and coats - the ones which cost thousands and rip them apart to see exactly how they are made and how to make similar suit/coat in cheaper fabric. They also look for other things where they can cut corners in the design. Her company also makes suits and coats for several different labels - it’s not like the designers company is manufacturing all dresses, suits, coats, etc. </p>
<p>It would only send that message to people who thought that buying something new was an appropriate effort to make. And that’s a debatable idea (that we are debating here). Compare “If you show up with uncombed hair, it gives the message that the event wasn’t important enough to comb your hair,” versus, “If you show up with gray hair, it gives the message the event wasn’t important enough to dye your hair.” </p>
<p>Most people would agree that mothers of grooms should comb their hair for the wedding. Most people would think that making the effort to dye gray hair is not in any way required, and showing up with gray hair attractively styled is no insult. And most, if not all, people here are saying that showing up in a beautiful flattering dress that was worn at another wedding is also not an insult. Some might decide to take offense, but such exigent people do not need to be coddled.</p>
<p>I really prefer natural fabrics, and I wear mostly cotton, linen, and silk. I agree that most of the dresses out there seem to be made from inferior fabrics. I’m really stunned by all of the pricey dresses I see online that are made of something fake and just look cheesy. </p>
<p>Do people really have many occasions to wear long gowns? I have actually never attended an event that required it, not in my entire life!</p>
<p>I strongly dislike most of the dresses sold as MOG/MOB. All that polyester and stiff lace, in dreary colors. I hope that if and when S gets married I can wear something like flowy silk or linen pieces…</p>
<p>“Wedding party is bride, groom, bridesmaids, groomsmen. Not parents, unless a parent is also a bridesmaid or groomsman.”</p>
<p>Not at the weddings I go to. Both sets of parents are part of the wedding party. They walk down the aisle, with the music playing, after all the guests are seated. </p>
<p>It’s a ceremony, not a magazine photo shoot. And mothers of the bride do no more than any other guest. They walk down the aisle with an usher, just like everybody else who is seated and watching the happy couple take their vows. If you get worried about a woman in yellow standing next to a woman in teal in a photo… well, that does not seem to me to be an issue to lose sleep over. </p>
<p>Then again, I don’t remember what my mother-in-law or my step-mother-in-law wore at my wedding. I don’t remember what anyone wore, except myself and the bridesmaids. I remember the food, though.</p>
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